Has anyone here ever told their parents about having HOCD? What was their response? I want to tell my parents that I have HOCD but I'm scared to because they might think I'm actually coming out to them as gay or bi, or that they'll think I'm in denial.

I’ve been struggling with HOCD for years, and it started with an intrusive thought about being gay when I was younger. It came up at age 12 and ever since, I’ve been trapped in a cycle of doubt and anxiety. I obsess over whether or not I’m secretly gay, even though I don’t feel that way at all. What makes it worse is the fear that I might have internalized homophobia, and that’s why I’m having these obsessive thoughts. I worry that my anxiety is a sign that I’m repressing something or rejecting part of myself. It feels like my mind keeps repeating the same question—am I gay?—and no matter how much reassurance I get, the fear doesn’t go away. I used to pray for my family members, fearing that if I didn’t, something bad would happen to them, and now it feels like I have to control these thoughts, or something will go wrong. For a while, it was quieter, but a week ago, the thoughts spiraled up again, and now the anxiety feels overwhelming again. It’s exhausting, and I don’t know how to break free from this constant loop of doubt. Has anyone dealt with the fear of internalized homophobia alongside HOCD? How do you manage the anxiety that comes with it?

Cause i feel like i am the only one with these thoughts

So since I was kid, I haven't really thought about being atracted to someone else then boys. I was soo into them. I used to dream about them(when I grew older, I had even intimate dreams), was nenrvous around them, had butterflies in my stomach etc. I have never ever thought about being with girl, it felt weird for me. The first maybe OCD I remember, was at 7-8, because I was scared of dead. I coulnd't sleep and had panic attacks, but sibce that all of it was okay. At maybe 10-12 I had HOCD(or I think it is) for the first time, because my mom kept asking me if I like boys and that made me nervous. The first time I had like real HOCD(i hope it is) was, when I was 16. I remember I watched some fireshow and there was a girl. And I watched her closely and suddenly I got this thought "Am I lesbian". I got out of it maybe after half of the year, because I didn't know anything about HOCD at that time. This year it started again out of nowhere. I even remember that the day it started I was dreaming about boys. This time it was horrible. I didn't sleep well, always getting up, couldn't eat, think properly, do anything. I found out it could be HOCD and I was happy again for maybe 4 days. Then it came back with thoughts like I am not straight and I dont have HOCD etc. Right now I don't know who I am. The things thaht really triggers me are past memories. I found out how to "pleasure" myself early and it didn't really matter what video was I watching. So of course I watched not porn, but just something that was avaible on youtube and instagram. I also remember I used to watch like gacha things about it(I was weird) and it scares me. I once or twice thought about kissing girl during it, but didn't really want to do it irl at that time. I am so sorry that it's too long, but I just want to get it out of me. I would appreciate some comments or advices..