- Date posted
- 5y
- Date posted
- 5y
Hi, I've literally just had my first phonecall with a therapist over this and other things I was terrified I was going to be reported. I know I'm not supposed to reassure but i know exactly what you are going through I have a child and i get horrible urges which make me question everything, I know I dont want to do these things but its like my OCD makes me get this horrible feeling in my hand that makes me feel like I need to do something Telling the therapist all this was scary but they told me they are going to help and they are not concerened that I am a threat so do yourself a favour and get on the phone and refer yourself. You will feel better, my mind is still trying to find ways to make me doubt things but I'm just fighting through it.
- Date posted
- 5y
thanks so much, i’ll definitely try and do the same
- Date posted
- 5y
I’m in the same situation. But I’m only at 5 weeks therapy I know I’ll have to work daily for a while to get to a place where I don’t give importance to the thoughts. We will get there :))
- Date posted
- 5y
First I’m happy you got on a phone call :))) And regarding the original author of the message if felt exactly the same. I always knew the only thing I’m going to success is being a mum and you know what this dream is accessible. Your OCD won’t stop it. Start therapy and will learn how slowly looking at child again and even more being a mum one day. Start therapy !!!
- Date posted
- 5y
Thankyou, I totally agree. Avoiding being a mum will just make you even more unhappy and just prolong your anxiety. Honestly even though I struggle sometimes with the thoughts about my son, sometimes he is my saviour when I'm feeling down, I just hold him and I know I would never hurt him They are the best thing to have ever happened to me. You know deep down past that OCD you are not capable of these things.
- Date posted
- 5y
and i don’t get as anxious as i used to so then i worry that it means that these thoughts are what i want even though i know they definitely definitely aren’t!!
- Date posted
- 5y
Be brave. Are you in therapy ?!
Related posts
- Date posted
- 18w
I hate the way ocd has completely messed up my brain, I struggle to tell the difference between an intrusive though and a regular one, I have really bad issues with morality and I feel as if my brain can no longer tell what is and isn't right and I can't tell if I'm over reacting about situations and I end up feeling stuck in a loop of wondering if I'm a bad person and trying to look at a situation rationally and not knowing if that's even possible with the state of my mind, I feel like none of my thoughts are actually mine. I hate it and I wish I could feel in control of my thoughts even for just a day, just to know what it's like. I've had ocd symptoms since I was about 9-10 so i feel like I've never really know a life without it. I just wish I could live out my teenage years like anyone else my age. I can hardly engage with my hobbies and passions and I don't know what to do about it. I can't go to therapy or get medication because I'm not even diagnosed, I just feel trapped. I'm only a teenager, like I said, I don't want to live my entire life like this.
- Date posted
- 14w
Im 16 years old and female and up until very late last year and this year I’ve been having thought almost every day that I’m a pedophile or that I’m sexually attracted to or want a romantic relationship with child. I don’t know how to explain it and I don’t want judgment because I’m genuinely so scared and disgusted, but anytime I’m around children I feel my chest tighten, my body feels warm and it feels like I don’t know how to breathe. I sometimes get a groomer response but even then I don’t know if it’s a ground response or not. Also I tend to stare at children when I’m anywhere near them, I feel like if I don’t I’m a weirdo and if I don’t look at them it means I’m attracted to them which I guess could be POCD but I feel like I stare at them inappropriately. Not too long ago maybe three weeks ago I went to the park with my family and there were two girls in their swim suits and I was looking at their backsides and I felt really anxious and scared like I usually do but I felt so upset by looking at them that way and now I’m scared to go to pools or splash pads because every time I do I feel like I stare at them gross and I just feel so disgusted with myself. When I tell myself not to look I end up looking and then I stare. I feel better when I’m not around them but even then, I look back at what I saw earlier that day and I feel anxious again and then I look up what’s been happening and then I feel more worried it’s not OCD. My friends who have OCD say I might have it but I can’t get a therapist, I can’t talk to anyone I’m scared I’ll be put in jail and that I’m not a good person. I’ve never head thoughts like this until this year and near the end of last year and they come now? I don’t know what to do.
- Date posted
- 11w
I feel like I wasted my life.I am almost 20 years old I feel like I did some mistakes that are too horrible to be forgiven.I didnt help a kid who needed help..Who was in danger ..Who was hurt.This made me think I am dangerous and can't be trusted.I started to have these terrible terrible thoughts(pocd) and I feel like I changes since then.Like I am not a ,,pure" person.That I can't be like I was before.I hope it was a compulsion..I used to also stare at kids years ago.I know is so disgusting and I will never act like that again.I feel like I did something too terrible.I am scared this is all proof I am a p..I don't wanna be that.I will never do something but I am so disgusted by my thoughts.I know I shoulf not seek reassurance and all but I don't know if anyone will want to be near me if they knew.I feel like an impostor.And I am scared to tell a therapist..what if they told me that I really am?! Ped******a is one of the things that disgust me the most ..(I think for everyone is like that).I feel like I am too terrible to do something in life.After all of this idk if I deserve anything.Maybe there was a chance if I didn't start to have these thoughts..but now..I want to became a psychologist, to travel the world.I feel like I wasted my life .And I feel like I have too many things to do and have a lot of places to go.Some people are sick and can't do the things I CAN do.And I feel guilty because of that.And I am also scared I will get sick( as I write this, I am scared I will manifest it).I am going to a therapist but idk if I have the courage to tell abt my pocd
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