Can someone answer who also has pocd ?

I know how you feel! But it will get better, I promise!

Maybe even do some exposure and make yourself look out of your window. Look at the trees, the birds, the sky etc.

No problem. It does affect me sometimes, not going to lie. I was at a point a few weeks ago where I did not want to have relations with him because I felt so shitty about myself and my thoughts. I thought I didn’t even deserve to be with him. But I have overcome that. It may come back, but that is why I am in therapy.

Sure. What is going on?

Sorry I know you’ve helped already but how do we actually know it’s just ocd

Just your last message is exactly what OCD is about.

So I probably have ocd

I’m just really worried I’m only 17 and struggling with this

I know it is scary. I had OCD since I was 7. Then it got worse when I got 16/17 and now I’m 26 and I got a severe break down... so really my advise is consult a OCD therapist. You will feeel much better. Mental heath is very important

I don’t know how long I’ve had it but looking back i think I’ve had it most my life but this is first time it’s disturbing me

And actually like disrupting my normal life

Where do you live ?

England

Must be some OCD specialist near by your home. Ask help!

Will a ocd specialist know about pocd cause it’s so hard to talk about

Of course.

Don’t want to upset you Zimmerkin but when u saw children any child did u get anxiety

Yes when you have POCD you are worried when you see children. You avoid them. You come to the point where you think I’ll never have children. You avoid your fear and look for reinsurance that you are actually not capable of that like you’re doing right now. It’s feeding your OCD. More you do that worse will be the thoughts. Therapy will learn you how to break these patterns and thoughts will slowly loose control over you.

Its even my younger brothers I don’t have intrusive thoughts about them but I get anxiety at times and avoid them as much as possible same with this is stupid but across my window is a child’s room one of my brothers mates and my Brian is telling me to look at my window but it just gives me loads of anxiety so I’m petrified to look out my window

Did you have similar to this ?

Yes, avoidance is my biggest compulsion. I avoid going to visit my nephew most of all, and it kills me. I love him so much, but I am so afraid I will hurt him :(

I can’t watch my sister change him or God forbid be the one to change him! Too scary!! That makes babysitting him impossible, and that makes me even sadder because I want to have a good relationship with him.

Yes I am like that I used to help pick my brothers up or help bath them now I can’t even look at them ?

When I was at my worst I went to Disneyland when we could obviously and now I can’t watch Disney plus because it makes me feel uneasy again

Me neither it’s so shit, how old are you if you don’t mind me asking

No problem. I’m 30.

Do you see a therapist?

Last question sorry do u have a relationship with a man or women ?

Relationship with a man.

Is that all ok does your pocd ever like disrupt anything sorry if it’s personal

Agreed x 1000 and same same same haha

I feel like that, I’ve been speaking to this girl and getting close but I am 17 and she’s 15 so I can do anything sexually I knkw it’s wrong, but with my thoughts I feel I don’t deserve her but I don’t want to push her away but I question if I like her and sometimes when I’m really down I don’t really feel anything at all just sad

Not gonna lie I ain’t sure haha she’s 2 years younger than me basically

Ah gotcha. Well, 2 years is not bad. As for the sexual part, I know the age of consent is 16 in the UK, but there is still no need to rush that part. Ask her out, and tell us on here how it goes :)

I think what I’ll do is now speak to my mum see if I can see a ocd therapist get back to myself physically with football because I’m good at football well I was and I’ll keep speaking to this girl and hopefully in time I can get better, Is that a good a plan or should I do a better one ?

Thank you for helping, worst part is at night where the thoughts come then I can’t sleep then it’s hard to get out of bed in the morning

It’s all scary I have a big nose aswell ?. Thank you for all your help

Aww I know! It will be okay though!

I hope it will

David beckham has ocd he mignt have had this aswell

He has ocd but obviously we don’t know what he’s gone through and tbh I don’t want people to know what I have

I’ve only told my mum, I haven’t told the girl but I said I might have ocd

Can you have like ocd meltdowns ?

Tbink I had one it was so scary

Does this actually get any easier

Yes, you just need to make sure you stick with your therapy. It does get easier

I’ll seek one I’ll talk to my mum

I think I’ve messed up big time

I don’t really wanna day but I will because idk what’s happening to me basically I was watching this show and he got arrested for child porn and I google why does child porn exist and now I’m panicking like why would I search that, I didn’t go on images I didn’t look for child porn but I searched why does it exist and I i don’t really know what I was looking for and now I’m panicking why did I search that what if the government is watching me and take me away for being a pedo and what if I’m actually turning into what we all fear with pocd as a pedo ? idk what to do don’t know how to feel but I feel like I don’t even deserve to live

Ok calm down, most of us with POCD have been there! You did not even actually google the porn part. You were just researching why is exists, which is actually a good question to be honest. You do deserve to live! You are just battling your thoughts and urges right now. With my POCD, I actually am scared that I will lose control and watch child porn, so this is not uncommon at all. It is just our OCD brains doing what they do best, and making us feel like shit. Don’t listen to it!

What so this is all normal well for pocd

Ok I don’t like it just wanna cry I feel so depressed I can’t sleep can’t get out of bed in morning u was training meeting that girl and all the thoughts just came now I can’t play football can’t even look at my brothers and I still meet the girl and I feel so happy but sometimes I just zone out my thoughts come feel so depressed and I don’t want to push her away but sometimes when the thoughts are present I feel nothing sexually for the girl cause I’m so depressed but I know I like it liked her cause she makes or made me happy

Aww hun I’m so sorry! You really need to to seek therapy, sweetie. This is exactly why OCD is so debilitating. It latches onto everything we care about.

I told the girl today about ocd and intrusive thoughts and she’s so caring and helpful but I’m not saying it’s pocd cause it’s just so dodgy not for us cause we’re going through it

Is it even possible for me to have a happy relationship with pocd and rocd

She doesn’t have to know the details. And it is possible, you just need to better yourself in the process. I remember when I was 17, going through Harm OCD. I thought I was so alone, and had no idea why I was getting the thoughts I was getting. Just remember you have a support system. It will all be ok. It just takes time.

Is mild ocd a thing ?

Because idrk if I have ocd at all or just not bad like I remember when I was 12 or 13 and went on holiday and had gay thoughts and loads of anxiety and kept getting reassurance from myself but after the holiday got home it didn’t bother me again and I felt back to normal but this year is when I had this pocd thing and it’s really made me down and not sure if I have depression but I got better which showed me I wasn’t actually a pedo cause when I was myself my attraction for girls came back like Normalafter 3 months of keeping it to myself but lockdown came and it all came back and now I have no sexual desire and I dktm really get thoughts just anxiety if I see a child which includes my brothers so idk if this is ocd or just being insane

Or mild Idek

Remember that OCD is the doubting disease.

Is rocd doubting ur own feeling for someone ?

How do you know you actually like them and not faking

Deep down you just know. Beneath all the worry, anxiety, and OCD you feel it. You even said she makes you smile. That’s how you know.

I feel happy with her and I think I like her like she’s on my mind but when my intrusive thoughts come I feel like I don’t like anyone like I have no sex drive

Like i knkw I like her cause she makes me smile and feel like I’ve never felt before and I wouldn’t want to lose her but my ocd just has me doubting all the time when I’m by myself

Do you google stuff ?

All the time. Don’t do it to yourself.

I saw this thing about pedos how they look have a high mouth palette or something and weird ears and I keep comparing myself and don’t even know what I’m looking for and just making me feel worse n worse

And it will make you feel worse and worse. I have been there too. Googling is a compulsion and it’s best not to feed into those compulsions

Ok I’ll try can how we look actually determine who we are ?

I spoke to a therapist she believes it’s ocd but can’t diagnose me cause someone else has to do it and now I don’t know what to do

I’m guessing this therapist does not specialize in OCD?

It was a ocd specialist but we only spoke on the phone

She said it’s sounds like ocd but she’s can’t diagnose me so now where do I go from there

I don’t know what’s wrong with me just wanna go back to last year where I felt fine I know I don’t want to do anything with a child I don’t even have thoughts anymore but I see a child and get anxiety but I don’t have any sexual desire for anyone because I feel so shit

Like I can’t even look at my brothers without getting anxiety just wanna feel myself again ? and don’t think I ever will

Like I believe I aitm actually that monster because I’ve been through it and when I got to myself didn’t notice kids at all but since lockdown I’ve had it again this is the third time and I can’t do it anymore all I wanted is to grow up and have kids and now I feel everything is against me I dktm want to think about sex cause idek what’s gonna pop into my mind I don’t even want to do more than kissing with the girl I’m seeing cause I’m so scared and I really Dk what to do anymore

That means a lot thank you but I haven’t even been diagnosed with ocd so what if it isn’t and I’m just a monster I’m questioning if I even have ocd now my brain is so annoying like I’m fighting myself

Like I think it sounds more like ocd like when I felt fine before lockdown I didn’t even notice children again like I did before And my attraction came back and I didn’t feel sad but now it’s all back again sorry to be saying all this too u I’m probably so annoying

Sorry to hear you suffered for so long and I feel like I’ve had the worst of it like I dktm get intrusive thoughts anymore but I feel anxiety if I see a child or even my brothers which is the most upsetting and it’s only really Little children when I can tell there children I just want it to go so I can have my head in a stable state like I feel I’ve always been a gd person I’d put my brothers family m friends before myself which isn’t always a gd thing but I did and now I feel like a bad keratin

Person didn’t mean to put keratin ?

Oh no, that’s not why I said that. I’m not saying my situation is worse than yours. No way! We are all in this together, and I just wanted you to know that I am proud of your progress, even if you don’t see it as progress just yet. You will one day :)

Will it ever just go ?

Yeah I hope so sometimes I don’t get the thoughts just get anxiety if I see a child or I went to Paris when I was at my worst and now when I see that it triggers anxiety

Like a picture from when I was at Paris or if a Disney film comes on I avoid it cause gives me anxiety

Is that still ocd

What’s best to do when I see the picture or the film cause I just avoid looking or stop watching the film

The best thing to do is to keep watching it. That is what exposure is all about.

Ok thank you for all your help your helping me a lot I appreciate it