Anonymous
- Date posted
- 5y
JamarcelineJamarceline
- Date posted
- 5y
My mother probably has OCD and I know how you feel. Her ego is gigantic and she feels like when we tell her to go to therapist to talk about her obsessive thoughts she says us out loud everyday she feels offended like she hears " you're mental " instead . To be honest I dont think she will ever go to doctor and I think you should take care of yourself first. Depression is hard and anxiety sucks. Once you get gigantic anxiety and depression you'll develop certain behaviours and thinking patterns that are difficult to stop so it will take much more time to cure your anxiety and depression than actually developing it by wanting to help your husband . I don't know how old are you and if you have children but it's a waste of time if you have to lost yourself for someone who doesnt want help
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 5y
I know I’m wasting my time... I’m 32 and I have a 2year old... I was almost out of it... but he’s manipulative... he makes me believe things will change etc... but I’m starting to realise I’m ruining my life here... more over I’m too scared because the level of his involvement in my life and the obsession is something I’m afraid to even dig deep into
Fear Strikes OutFear Strikes...
- Date posted
- 5y
Also, recommend the book "When a Family Member has OCD" by Jon Hershfield.
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 5y
Gonna try that
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 5y
Thanks
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 5y
At first it was just obsession about where what goes... everything has to be in a place or rather out of sight... and mostly that means most of my stuff goes missing and he always interferes with my belongings... even takes things out of my handbag and keeps them in places he thinks is right and then there are times I’ve gone to the supermarket and realised my purse is not in my handbag... silly things initially but they used to bug me... but I started to see more obsessive traits about me.... I strongly believe he was spying on me with his gadgets... he used to track my phone n never tell me about it until one day I did find out... and just last week I found out he hacked into my mother’s house cctv ( cuz I go there often) and he never told me about it until I caught him snooping into his phone to see a familiar view... he immediately hid it... but then the lies etc etc... and then he try’s to get away with it saying he’s only doing it cuz he cares... I’m sorry... but I only see creepy... and I’m so uncomfortable...
JamarcelineJamarceline
- Date posted
- 5y
In my opinion it doesnt sound very much like OCD but I'm not a doctor
Fear Strikes OutFear Strikes...
- Date posted
- 5y
Well, the arranging of items could be OCD related or OCPD. The distinction is that if it is OCD, he does it to get a "just right" feeling to reduce the anxiety of things "being out of place." On the other hand, if he strongly believes that there is a right or wrong way to arrange things without having an urge to reduce any underlying anxiety, then it's probably OCPD. OCPD is very difficult to successfully treat because it's a personality disorder. With respect to the spying, that is definitely not a hallmark of a healthy marital relationship. I recommend addressing your own anxiety and depression issues so that you can make good decisions about the future of your marital relationship.
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 5y
@Fear Strikes Out Yes... OCPD is what he has... you’re right...
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 5y
@Fear Strikes Out He says he wasn’t spying and that he just installed it on his phone and he meant to tell me and all that bullshit... but I’m worried... is that obsession ??? I know it’s completely unhealthy and it’s crazy... but I feel guilty to leave him... I want to help him out of it... I really do.. but at what cost ?
Fear Strikes OutFear Strikes...
- Date posted
- 5y
@OCD spouse That is not good. Insight is generally extremely poor for those with OCPD. Is he very rigid in his thinking generally?
Fear Strikes OutFear Strikes...
- Date posted
- 5y
@OCD spouse Would the two of you be open to couples therapy where these issues can be discussed between yourselves with a therapist facilitating? Also, if you search online for the Yale-Brown Obsessive Compulsion Scale (YBOCS), maybe he will take a brief 10 question assessment for OCD. Alternatively, maybe he can be diagnosed by a psychologist? Would your threat to leave with the baby motivate him to seek professional counseling?
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 5y
@Fear Strikes Out Yes I’ve threatened... and he says hel do it... but when it comes to the real deal he backs off... also.. he’s a surgeon ..... most of the psychologists are his colleagues or friend and he has a high profile in society... that stops him from going to a therapist I guess... n he thinks a psychiatrist is better than a psychologist... again... ego bullshit... and finally hel chose someone who he thinks is ok for him to go to... but I know there will be a biased opinion... and he has met my therapist once... n he said that my husband sounds like a very normal person and he’s so composed and seems so caring etc...but there are lots of layers to uncover n he needed a lot more sessions... of course he believed he was hiding it all.. because I had been in sessions with him earlier... but then my husband never followed it up I’m so tired... I’m afraid I’m losing focus over my son in the midst of all this drama
Fear Strikes OutFear Strikes...
- Date posted
- 5y
@OCD spouse When you said he's a physician, that screams OCPD to me. That doesn't make it trie, but it is true for many medical doctors. Also, going to therapy with someone you know (even if only an acquaintance) is generally frowned upon in counseling circles, at least in the States. Also, in the States, psychiatrists rarely do counseling. Their focus is medication management. It's the psychologists, counselors, and social workers who provide therapy.
Fear Strikes OutFear Strikes...
- Date posted
- 5y
@OCD spouse What country are you from?
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 5y
Hm... maybe not.. but he does have those traits... plus a lot of other traits... I’ve tried therapy for him... to talk and see what and how I can help.. my therapist says he’s way too complex to figure out through me and he needs to have a few sessions with him but it never happened
Fear Strikes OutFear Strikes...
- Date posted
- 5y
What types of behaviors does he exhibit?
ARTnotOCDARTnotOCD
- Date posted
- 5y
Feel welcome here, but know there may be other groups to seek out for more help too. Some of it sounds OCD, OCPD, narcissistic, manipulative, who knows without legitimate degrees and consultations with him. But it sounds like it’s possibly abusive. I don’t want to tell you if it is or isn’t. Just remember, the victim of abuse is the one who has the right to decide if it is. You can’t help him the best if you’re hurting too much because of him. If there’s any hotlines you want numbers for and you don’t feel comfortable looking them up, ask us, including support groups for OCD sufferers’ family members. Unfortunately with so many things, he has to want to change in order to do so. Seriously wishing the best for you all.
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- Date posted
- 22w
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- Date posted
- 19w
My partner has severe OCD
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Anonymous
- Date posted
- 15w
Willing to do anything.
What is a common family joke. OCD is hereditary on my father's side. However I also live with complex PTSD, and ADHD. I didn't learn till recently how severe my OCD is and the intensity gets amplified if the though goes to either of the other two. It's a loop I've identified recently... just little too late. I've lived with OCD for years not really addressing it till I see that's the very reason I cause damage to loved ones. I'm married, 33, a vet. My marriage is not in the best place now. I have a son who's 4 and already showing signs of OCD. Currently my marriage is at a point where we are working on ourselves. It's discovered that my wife's issues are reflections of my own. I understand fully now that I am the center of the issues but also the solution. I need help for me. What happens with my relationships depends on me showing that I am better and able to process thoughts and emotions better. Journaling helps alot. Trying to do hobbies or this that and 3rd but. I'm willing to try anything. Things are on a line. I'm open to any and all POV and ideas. I'm not out crying. I'm taking a big step for me. Something 25 years over due. Thank you for reading this. As I tell myself now. You'll best this and be better
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