So my most current theme has been ROCD. It’s been nagging at me for the last 4 years. OCD makes me INCREDIBLY self critical and I often turn that internal voice on to my partner and can be incredibly critical of him. In essence, I’m almost subconsciously sabotaging my relationship which is the OPPOSITE of what I want. I’m looking for people who experience this same response and patterned behaviour. Share tips, in-the-moment awareness suggestions. Words of encouragement (not reassurance). OCD is such a trip lol

To me too*

@nimziewd Have you had any CBT or therapy? Its a really tough thing to go through alone with having so many thoughts constantly crashing around your head. My therapist does say that using positive thoughts to cancel negative ones is mental neutralising and keeps the cycle going, but I haven't mastered that part myself yet either 🙃

@carvz84 I m getting therapy but she has not diagnosed me properly. I don't like my therapist much. I felt like she is telling me that m faking it. When she knows how much m struggling. M a straight A student but this thing has got me like 50 percent less concentration now. It's affecting me everywhere. She actually triggered me more. I didn't even start ERP but she triggered me with the situation that stands on 10 from 1-10 scale. She hasn't properly diagnosed me yet. She has taken a test which she says led to dangerous diagnosis which she thinks is not true. So she is gonna take a personality test tomorrow. Idk what's all this about

@nimziewd When I first went to therapy a few years ago my therapist had never heard of ROCD and right away I kinda felt like I was wasting my time. If you're still not feeling it after tomorrow I might look for another therapist, but you'll know the answer to that better than me. Has she referenced OCD at all?

@carvz84 She did agree once that my symptoms are like ocd and ask me to try to tell my boyfriend about that but when I talked to her next time that I felt rocd ish She says don't use the word lightly, you haven't been diagnosed yet. It was pretty rude for me. I was trying to describe what I felt. I couldn't tell my boyfriend as he cannot complex compound information. He just says there is nothing like that, just exercise and meditate, m with u he said. So I didn't open up to him. My therapist doesn't believe it Why would he who doesn't even know what ocd is or have different thinking altogether.

@nimziewd We are in a long distance right now and so it sucks more. I m sure he would have hugged me to sleep.

@nimziewd And it's not just rocd symptoms I get pedo, harm and SO theme as well.

@nimziewd Definitely find a therapist that works for you! Don’t give up. It can be super daunting and uncomfortable to keep explaining yourself to a new therapist, but I promise there is one who can help you!

Same :(