- Username
- shirekat
- Date posted
- 5y ago
I'm scared of going outside, too. I gave myself homework to go and take a walk every day. My grandparents always insisted on me not talking about my mental health (Ocd and depressive episodes) but I just recently started to question them making decisions over my head. Fuck that. A lot of people that I don't know very well but still trust them, know about my disorders. I think it's key to not talk about it as if it's something you need to be ashamed of. If you do that, people might really continue to think that it's shameful. But it's not. Even mentally healthy people have their traumata whether they realise that or not. So if you decide to be more open about yourself, give a fuck about yourself and don't give a fuck about their opinion about your mental health, in case it would only consist of destructive criticism and prejudice.
I'm not sure if you're asking shirekat or me. My obsession when I go for a walk is, that I might release my thoughts into my surroundings and become vulnerable to people who could read them. My compulsion to this was to control the ground whether I could see thoughts that I might have dropped. It shares similarities to symptoms that occur with psychosis but it is part of my Ocd. I talked about it with my psychiatrist and he explained that this is a fairly rare symptom but it exists.
People will judge you know matter what. I think as long as your happy who cares
Unfortunately, I'm not happy. I panic outside but I'm unhappy inside. I miss seeing people. ?
Can you do it gradually? Face your fears
I was starting to but my safe person just recently gave up on me. I feel like I'm back at square one.
What happens when you try to go outside? What makes you panic
Therapist, meds and goals, even if baby steps,to habituated to the anxiety of getting out.
Habituate
My OCD has been attacking my Dad lately. For whatever reason my ODC says “what if u r face gets red around him or while you’re talking to him and ppl think u like him or what if I have a panic attack around him and ppl think that he must’ve done something to me to make me afraid of him and HE DIDNT! He’s never been anything but a loving great Dad. It makes me feel like such a horrible person. It causes me at times to avoid him and I don’t want to. I just want these horrible thoughts about my Dad to go away. Has anyone else experienced this? And if so how did you cope? I HATE myself for this😭
Im scared being near people because I’m worried i might sexually assault them or even bump in to them I’ll start overthinking like idek it just worries me a lot and I have spent a lot less time with my family it makes me sad to pull away from them and I’d rather just be asleep all day to avoid the thoughts sometimes I just cry it gets so hard and I feel horrible
I can tell I'm avoiding my triggers. Im isolating myself from my friends, I'm only watching specific shows, I dont want to go outside, I dont want to see anyone. Its gotten to the point where I've asked for no intimacy with my boyfriend. We were getting intimate a few nights ago and I had an intense intrusive thought paste itself to my awareness and nothing I could do would make it stop and I had to ask him for space. My heart started pounding and my breathing got quicker. And now I'm afraid it will happen again. I can't stand the idea that I'd have these thoughts while being intimate with my boyfriend, it makes me feel disgusting and I feel bad that he has to date somene like me. I dont know how to face this. I just want to hide. I want to curl up and sleep for the rest of my life. I feel like its over for me idk
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