- Date posted
- 6y
- Date posted
- 6y
Trying to rationalise them is basically asking for reassurance and feeding it in my unprofessional opinion. You don’t ignore the thought, just don’t react to it. They will come back, but you just don’t react with fear and your brain will send less of them?
- Date posted
- 6y
I wish that too, but last Thursday I had my biggest meltdown yet. Was self harming, screaming into a pillow, I wanted to die. Every single day this happened Then I listened to Ali Greymonds methods of dealing with the thoughts and I’ve been ‘stable’ ever since. Thoughts don’t get to me as much, I don’t ruminate as much. Went from 10/10 to about 7/10 (which is a big leap from no hope to 30% of my life back)
- Date posted
- 6y
Ugh, I can only imagine how that must feel? Yeah, I have discovered her recently and I have been listening to her but I was conflicted about what to do since my latest therapy with my therapist. It’s like I don’t know who should I listen to you know ? Great job on your progress and overcoming your fears? it takes a lot to go from zero to 30% I hope you continue your progress and find a relief, I wish that to all of us struggling...
- Date posted
- 6y
I hope things get better for you too! I’d maybe get a second opinion? Because not all therapists are good. Everywhere says don’t look for reassurance. I tried rationalising my thoughts for a month and it made me worse (don’t want to advise in case it’s wrong) I’d just make sure the therapist knows about OCD :) It feels better to go from 0 hope to 30% hope haha! Keep updated on this post!
- Date posted
- 6y
I also went to a therapist for a little bit that advised rationalizing my thoughts and labeling them as OCD thoughts (writing down the ‘OCD’ thought and then writing down a rational thought beside it) but I agree with Lewis in that I found it made me ruminate more and perform a checking compulsion constantly. Also, separating ‘OCD thoughts’ from ‘regular thoughts’ made me label the thoughts as not necessarily my own and led to some intense depersonalization and pushed me more into black and white thinking:( Now i’m finding that I just write down my most repetitive/intrusive thoughts at the end of each day and just leave it at that: eventually I’m able to see that regardless of whether they are ‘rational’ or not, they are repetitive and therefore intrusive so I shouldn’t give too much meaning to them. I hope that makes sense!
- Date posted
- 6y
What do you mean rationalize them? Like try to think rationally about them?
- Date posted
- 6y
I’m not an expert, and don’t really know what helps in the long term. But as m.a.d said, say if your thought is “what if I did this 4 years ago” Then the rational thought would be “Well it happened so long ago, what’s the point in worrying” To everyone who doesn’t have OCD that’s enough...but to us we are like “BUT what if it does?!” If you have the thought you can label it in your head as an OCD thought, or say “Yeah sure, whatever I’m this horrible person” then get on with your day. The compulsion would to be to get reassurance and try convince yourself you’re not a bad person. Sorry for the long paragraph, hope it makes sense haha!
- Date posted
- 6y
No worries! Keep us updated!
- Date posted
- 6y
Well yeah that’s exactly my thinking, too. I just wish there was some sort of magic pill taking it all away in a day ?
- Date posted
- 6y
@Lewis will do, thanks for the support. I’m going to talk to her next time I see her. She’s definitely one of the best I can find in my city and she suffered from ocd too so I think I just have to explain it a bit better to her my questioning? @m.a.d. Yes, that’s exactly it, like keeping some sort of journal and writing down why those thoughts(ocd thoughts) aren’t real. Thanks for your response it’s been really helpful ? @pluto yes, like trying to see a rational picture beyond the ocd thought, and also everything i just wrote in response to @m.a.d. up here ?
- Date posted
- 6y
@Lewis yeah, it totally makes sense and thank you so much for engaging in a conversation with me ?
Related posts
- Date posted
- 25w
I’m new to the app and wanting to know who else experiences this form of ocd. Some background I was a therapist for over 10 years now I am out of the clinical space. So I have background knowledge of ocd but never knew much about relationship ocd. I realized over the last several years with my now fiancé, that I have a hard time just letting go in general, whether that’s an argument or statement or feeling. I want to be able to just accept things at face value and move on (and talk later if my partner is ready as needed). But when conflict arises I can’t disengage till there is a clear resolution. It’s causing serious strife as he can feel trapped and it escalates the argument. I am reading more and this sounds like relationship OCD. Anyone else experience this? Curious on what others have done to work on this for themselves. I do have a therapist but we are not doing work in this area yet as I am realizing this is an actual concern.
- Date posted
- 15w
Hello, so I’m in therapy for ROCD but my therapist says she doesn’t think/feels that I have ROCD. Her reasoning is because “compulsions don’t provide any sense of relief for someone with OCD, they are constant even after compulsions” but i’ve read online that they do provide relief until a new intrusive thought restarts the cycle. She also said I can’t have ROCD if I don’t show signs of regular OCD, because ROCD is only a subtype and I must have OCD to have ROCD. I’ve read otherwise online though so all therapist on here is she correct? (She also mention she only has 2 years experience and has a supervisor she reports to)
- Date posted
- 8w
I wanted to talk about my experiences with rOCD since I currently do still suffer from it but I know if I talked about them. My thoughts are just gonna get stronger, but I’ll do it for the sake of talking about my experiences to others who feel like they’re alone. I have a very loving relationship actually my first healthy relationship we are currently still dating one year and six months. I would say these intrusive thoughts started to happen once I hit the one year mark with him. Nothing in the relationship has made me think these thoughts, but it just came. Like when my mind tried to make me think I liked another guy other than my boyfriend and that I was losing feelings for him. I started to panic because I knew that my heart belonged to my boyfriend and having thoughts that were against that belief it made me really anxious cause I never had those thoughts before. I was in and out of the care center at my school constantly having anxiety attacks, and it was affecting me day by day. I talk to my boyfriend about it because my mind can never keep secrets from him because then I would feel like that I’m lying to him… my mind just kinda works that way and I believe it’s due to the situation I have with rOCD. Luckily, he was really supportive.. in thoughts I’ve had was what if I don’t like him anymore or if he doesn’t do this does that mean he likes me or if he’s even the one just a lot of doubts about me and him in the relationship. And for anyone who’s experiencing stuff familiar to this you are not alone invalid only what you believe is what is true. And I know it’s gonna be hard to know what’s true or not because these thoughts that you have versus what’s in your heart you get confused but if you know that you love that person then that’s what true. Also, the only reason why it affected me a lot was because I kept trying to solve it and the only solution is to let those thoughts in and accept that you have those thoughts. I don’t mean as an accept that these thoughts are true, but accepts that those are the thoughts that you’re thinking because if you keep on trying to find a solution to remove them, it only just get worse.
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