- Date posted
- 3y ago
- Date posted
- 3y ago
Researching the Kinsey scale just became a compulsion for me... like “what is my exact number? Did other women with this number marry men? Did they have to break up with their husbands? Etc.” A more helpful way to think of sexuality may be as a kaleidoscope than a scale. A therapist told me that and it helped. I don’t know why. But anyway, Nour you didn’t ask about that. I’ve been there panicking and crying. Try the SOS function on this app. Maybe try some Headspace short meditations, just to calm down. Then try approaching it with “so? So what?” Like “so what if you took a bunch of tests? So what if someone said you were in denial? So what if you are?” And then move on. Or maybe you brain will say something like “well then I might marry a man and dump him for a woman” and you can say to that thought “so?” As if you don’t really care. Anyway just one technique that helped me. But maybe just try those SOS audios and calm down a bit.
- Date posted
- 3y ago
you're right but it's so hard because saying so what feels like i am accepting it. to be honest, at this point i don't care what i am i just want to be sure about something, but i still freak out when i think about being with women like i just don't want it it doesn't feel like me. do you think this is still ocd or denial?
- Date posted
- 3y ago
@Nour04 You can work your way there. For now it seems like doing some calming method are what you need. Doing body scan meditation helps me when I panic... like “where do I feel the anxiety in my body? Can I let it be there and observe it just as a sensation without making it mean anything.” But there is lots of YouTube. Are you doing erp therapy? Maybe you will work up to the “maybe I am maybe I’m not” and “so what” kind of reponses. But just start by cutting our compulsions.... google, ruminating, etc. If these types of videos we always popping up on your insta reel you may be doing too much research :-) You know I can’t answer if I think you have hocd or denial (and I don’t know you. Just like the person who made that insta video doesn’t know you!) but here is a good article from John Hershfield where he talks about denial: https://www.sheppardpratt.org/news-views/story/treatment-for-hocd/
- Date posted
- 3y ago
@Susan4444 okay thank you so much! i haven't been stuck in rumination for a while and i felt like i was doing better, but then yesterday this showed up and my heart started beating super fast and i started crying and sobbing which went on for about an hour, with a ton of thoughtd racing through my head like "what if" or "imagine this" or "do you like this", and after i calmed down i had an awful headache for the rest of the day. what perplexed me was whether i cried because i got triggered and i have hocd, or if i cried because i felt "called out" for being in denial
- Date posted
- 3y ago
@Nour04 I remember I had a time like that too where I was just crying hysterically cause I tried to “stop being in denial and accept myself” whatever that means. It was so scary. You are not alone!!! The hard part now is to sit with the uncertainty and discomfort of not knowing why you were triggered and trying not to put meaning on it. Do you have ocd therapist? They can help with this.
- Date posted
- 3y ago
@Susan4444 i am not currently going to therapy no, but thank you very much for the advice!!
- Date posted
- 3y ago
Don’t try to figure out if your in denial or not. Maybe you are, maybe you arnt, trying to figure it out only causes more uncertainty, confusion, and anxiety.
- Date posted
- 3y ago
denial and ocd are can overlap but they’re not the same
- Date posted
- 3y ago
what do you mean overlap???
- Date posted
- 3y ago
@Nour04 for lack of better word its like the “symptoms”
- Date posted
- 3y ago
@nikkii ow okay
- Date posted
- 3y ago
@nikkii but then how do i know? what if i'm in denial?
- Date posted
- 3y ago
Hey, I know how immensely triggering this probably feels, and the anxiety is likely just through the roof. With this theme, anxiety around the question of ‘am I not who I think I am?’ becomes extremely, extremely high, making everything feel blurry and threatening. OCD tells us that there is no way we can be at peace, unless the question is answered in the most empirically certain way possible. That really isn’t true. The likelihood is, you were just trying to appease your OCD by taking those tests, which definitely segregates you from the hoard of people in those comments. Because of the anxiety, and your amygdala firing off, you don’t have the ability to logically and calmly think: ‘well, that was their experience, mine could be entirely different. Maybe I shouldn’t compare myself to random people on the internet when my life, my history, and my personal factors could differ drastically to those people in that comment section’ And even then, when we’ve broken down that situation in a logical way to relieve our anxiety, OCD will persist, because that’s what OCD does. Because of this, the only answer is for us to give that question NO power. OCD gets its power from compulsions, and even looking at this logically is a compulsion. On YouTube, search anxiety meditation. It really helps me when I’ve got nagging anxiety, and I really think you could benefit from giving it a try. Sending my love, you’re okay! ❤️
- Date posted
- 3y ago
thank you indefinitely for this. the only fear that is persistant is whether it's truly ocd or just deep deep denial i am trying not to give in to rumination trying to figure this out because today has been hectic, i cried for an hour and i still have a horrible headache and can't keep my eyes open. i am exhausted. thank you for the amazing advice though, very much appreciated, and if you ever need anything i am here for you xx
Related posts
- Date posted
- 24w ago
Guys it feels so real and im really scared because it feels like i dont care about the thoughts and it feels like im going to do something terrible, its horrific. I am so scared i keep getting urges and images i dont know what to do because i get a whole rush of panic. I think what’s triggered it was my for you page on tiktok, on the Mendez brothers murder cases and The prada guy and im so scared but it feels like im not worried like abt the thoughts or feeling but i am scared pls reply its literally plaguing me in my head idk what to do bc it feels like im gonna do it
- Date posted
- 23w ago
Ok so I’m a 17 year old female, and I’ve always thought I was straight. But I just really want to know how you would know the difference between so-ocd and actually questioning your sexuality. I have nothing against the LGBTQ community (in fact I am very much a token straight friend, lol) but I saw a video about comp-het recently and it sort of felt like what I was experiencing. I don’t want to be gay, I want to be with men, I want to like men, I’ve always liked men, but now I’m questioning whether or not that’s real? Because people can be gay but not want to be right? I’m single and I always have been. I think women are gorgeous, but when I try to imagine actually having any sort of romantic or sexual relationship with a woman it feels wrong, at least most of the time it does? Sometimes I’m less sure, and I’ve never been particularly boy crazy. I’ve liked maybe 2 or 3 people in my life, (not to say I’ve never found other guys attractive, but it doesn’t seem to be as often as most people) I have no particular reason to be afraid of being gay, very supportive family, safe area ect, but I don’t want to be, does that mean this is ocd, I don’t know what’s going on every time I say I’m straight I feel like I’m lying, but that might just be because I think about it so much. The idea of being with a woman doesn’t feel like something I would want, but is that just because I don’t want to want it? People online say things with so much sureness, if you feel like this it means this. Ect.
- Date posted
- 18w ago
So I was on a hat chat gpt and it said that people who are non-offenders experience distress and anxiety and disgust and depression and they feel ashamed of being a non-offender like WHAT like that's honestly terrifying and I'm so scared because that's how I've been feeling like when I'm out I get anxiety too especially when I see a younger person I always been attracted to MEN my whole life can people turn into monsters and I don't even care if they have problems if there attracted to kids then there sick in the head like don't care like this has been sharing me soo much and the worst part about it is that they said some are in denial or suppress their attractions I'm so done...... I can not do this this is too much I would rather be gone from this earth than find out that I might be one like you have to be kidding me if you're attracted to young people and desire that you're sick and dead to me you're a monster I don't care like its disgusting. for this eole some people are suffering from POCD like me are scared to think about that and I'm terrified.
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