- Date posted
- 3y ago
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 3y ago
If you are going to tell your parents that you aren’t straight in hopes that it’ll take away the discomfort and provide relief, you’ll find that if there is any relief it’ll be temporary and the OCD will come back torment you. If you are thinking about telling your parents about your Sexual Orientation OCD and informing them of your mental struggles for support, by all means do so. Be careful though because your parents might provide you unintentional reassurance about sexuality and in turn make the OCD worse. Your goal should be learn to deal with the uncertainty about your sexuality and all discomfort and distress whether it be thoughts, emotions, sensations, or what have you that bothers you.
- Date posted
- 3y ago
Well said!
- Date posted
- 3y ago
I'm just not sure who I am anymore. I keep getting thoughts like I want a boyfriend etc.... 😕. Not sure if it's real or not just feels me full of anxiety
- Date posted
- 3y ago
@Ihateocd83 It’s also ok to not always be 100% sure what your sexuality is. Always checking your sexuality is a compulsion. You get to choose to sexuality. OCD makes us think we have to know what we feel and what we feel always means something when in reality it doesn’t.
- Date posted
- 3y ago
@Jon w/ OCD My gf went down my phone and found all of the messages from me and my therapist. And she said she can't continue when I have this going on and said I've ruined her life and should have told her I had this going on. I have 2 children with her but she said I've dragged them into this mess 😔
- Date posted
- 3y ago
@Ihateocd83 That’s really hard. I can’t imagine how hard that is for you. I was fortunate enough to have learned about my OCD before my marriage and my wife is supportive, but it took her sometime to really understand. We watched tons of videos, read lots of research, etc. This sounds really hard
- Date posted
- 3y ago
@Jon w/ OCD I just don't think this is ocd anymore. Before I thought I had all the symptoms but it just feels like real feelings etc. When I think of women it feels like I don't like there virginas
- Date posted
- 3y ago
This is such a hard thing to deal with. It’s also hard because most people don’t understand what the true definition of OCD is, especially what SO-OCD is. It may be helpful to sit down with your parents and watch an informational video of what SO-OCD is and explain to them how you feel. Here is an example of a great video on SO-OCD https://www.madeofmillions.com/articles/talking-sexual-orientation-ocd-with-dr-steven-phillipson
- Date posted
- 3y ago
Thanks mate 👍
- Date posted
- 3y ago
Don't tell them. Unfortunately I have been there where (before I even knew what HOCD was), I did some confessing--multiple times lmao--and it provided temporary relief...key word being temporary. It was a compulsion, I did it purely because I couldn't sit with the discomfort. Don't be like me 😂
- Date posted
- 3y ago
I also did it after I knew what HOCD was, us obsessive compulsives have to learn to deal with anxiety and discomfort
- Date posted
- 3y ago
@alexisrae1999 But it feels so real and as if I want to be with a man. It just upsets so much. Because I loved women so much. I've had this since the age of 22 of 38 now and now it's just like I'm gay
- Date posted
- 3y ago
@Ihateocd83 You don't have to prove to anyone, or even yourself that you are straight, gay, or bi. I really feel bad that you've been suffering for so long, please do not prolong your suffering by looking for answers. We all wish we could have answers, but our brains are different from neurotypicals. I am also sad about my situation, but giving in to the compulsions, confessing, reassurance asking, etc will dig us deeper into our ocd :(
- Date posted
- 3y ago
@alexisrae1999 I don't know what to do. All I do is think of this and men all the time I can't focus on anything else 😔
- Date posted
- 3y ago
@Ihateocd83 The more you analyze it the deeper it takes you into believing it.
- Date posted
- 3y ago
@lewthompson3 My mind is telling me I want to be with a man and like penises. This is something that is new to my hocd and happened last August and has ruined my life.
- Date posted
- 3y ago
@Ihateocd83 Have you talked to a therapist and learned of ways to handle OCD?
- Date posted
- 3y ago
@lt3 I just don't think it is ocd anymore maybe I used to believe that but now I don't. My mind is telling me I want to be with a man etc...
- Date posted
- 3y ago
i did this and I felt zero relief. it actually made me feel worse, and i back-tracked almost immediately and instead just told my mom i was very confused and obsessed with figuring my sexuality out.
- Date posted
- 3y ago
Read my comment above tho mate ? 😔
Related posts
- Date posted
- 19w ago
I feel so sad, alone, scared and hopeless. Until two months ago there was not even the remote possibility of being anything other than heterosexual and now the idea that I could find out that I was lesbian or bisexual terrifies me to death. Everything was born from the fact that I didn't feel sexual desire towards my ex-boyfriend and I started to be afraid that it was because I was a lesbian... how can I be a lesbian or bisexual if everything was born from this? I would like to run away from myself and my head. I would really like to go back and go back to my life before. I can't take it anymore. I just want to live my life like before
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 16w ago
I’ve had so many moments of clarity with my OCD that I love my boyfriend and I’m beyond willing to go through this to be better and be with him. in the back of mind I’ve in a way known I was at least somewhat sexually attracted to women (I’m a woman) since the start of the ocd it was always like “okay. Fine, but I don’t want to date a girl” I only just realized this after the ocd started, I never really argued with this. my ocd has always revolved around if I’m romantically interested in women and not men. I’ve done so many compulsions through this year and a half and 9 times out of 10 have come to the conclusion that I don’t want to be with a woman romantically. I always end up feeling like I know I love my boyfriend. But the doubts don’t stop about whether I want to spend my life with a woman instead, my heart literally breaks to think of not being with my bf and imagining him with someone else. I don’t want to be with a woman I know deep down somewhere underneath the anxiety that that’s not what I want. It doesn’t feel natural for me, unfulfilling. I want to tell my boyfriend about the possible sexual attraction to women (ik it’s still ocd related) but I’m scared that once I tell him, I’ll realize that I actually do want to be with women and not with him. Ugh I’ve spent hours today ruminating about this after being solid in my commitment with him for a little while, I’m stuck in this loop and idk how to get out right now
- Date posted
- 11w ago
Sorry long post. Anyone feel like now they’re just in extreme denial. Like when I was little I noticed guys more than girls in movies and was more drawn to them. I remember changing my mindset to switch that. 98%of my life has been straight until recently. I felt drawn to some guys but never thought of it sexually. Always had girl crushes dreams and porn. Now I watch porn and I feel like straight takes longer and then I go and watch gay porn and feel nothing until I tell myself it’s two attractive dudes and love is love and imagine physical sensations and then it hits like suddenly. Like I have to convince myself it’s alright. Then when I try again I can do all that but feel nothing and then straight porn works. Idk if it’s just getting a fix or the first time works with anything or what but it’s confusing. On top of that I’ve felt girl relationships including my wife maybe miss something and a guy maybe matches that feeling that but then I feel like I’d be missing something without a girl or my wife. Idk I’ve had some rough times in life with male figures in my life but idk. I feel like I have to convince myself more and more that I’m straight even more than the first time I dealt with this. Can someone relate? Please
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