- Date posted
- 6y
- Date posted
- 6y
Hi, Katee ? I know you feel panicked right now, but take some time to take a deep breathe and find your ground. You say that you can’t stop thinking about all of the germs correct? Do you think you can try and give yourself this little opportunity to not do your daily compulsions and just let those “germ” feelings sit there? I know it might feel dangerous, but eventually, the anxiety will subside and you will feel better in the long run. Take care of yourself, wish you and your kid love ❤️
- Date posted
- 6y
Beautiful advice! ?
- Date posted
- 6y
I have similar issues re: germs and washing...that panicky feeling is so awful, but keep trying to fight those compulsions! It’s like working out a muscle - you’ll get stronger over time. I agree 100% w uglyjd’s advice above. And to be honest, your experience is inspiring me to try some erp re: cleanliness tomorrow...if you can sit with this anxiety, I should be brave enough to do so too! I’ll try anyway :)
- Date posted
- 6y
Congrats on making it through the day katee!! It sounds like you did some difficult work today - I’m genuinely impressed. Ok, definitely gonna push myself to rise to challenges tomorrow. And yes, I think it’s great to share our journeys! Other (non-ocd) ppl don’t really realize the effort that goes into fighting these compulsions & obsessions...sometimes I feel like I’m running a marathon! One step in front of the other....
- Date posted
- 6y
You got this marathon !! You might fail like me every other day or every day. We’re only human.
- Date posted
- 6y
Good job avoiding the compulsion re: your shoe, Lark!! I would have similar anxiety in that situation. Good luck at your work today, and yes, let’s continue fighting! I’m setting a small goal for myself today regarding food & hygiene - it’ll definitely make me stressed out, but I’m steeling myself to follow through. Even if it’s two steps forward, one step back - that’s still one step in the right direction
- Date posted
- 6y
Lark we are sooo similar haha id be wanting ALL of the Lysol wipes.
- Date posted
- 6y
Great job!! I cried last time I got blood drawn - it’s really hard! But it sounds like you handled it like a champ - and I bet next time will be even better. You’re strengthening that anti-ocd muscle!
- Date posted
- 6y
Aww :( sorry u cried that sucks !
- Date posted
- 6y
I’ll be tougher next time :) it’s a journey! (Plus it helps that the nurse was really nice about it)
- Date posted
- 6y
I realize that even without a trigger ocd will find a way. It’s up to us to fight and quiet it
- Date posted
- 6y
Uglyjd I like to explore this given my unfortunate exposure today. Still reallyyy tough to do as I got very close to blood which is my major trigger. I can’t stop thinking over and over did I step on it for hours now it’s almost easier for me to just wipe my shoe but I’m really trying
- Date posted
- 6y
Too bad we couldn’t make group chats and add each other. That would be a great feedback to give this app. So that way we can keep in touch and share our similarities in this journey. So I made it through the day. I even had two wash my hands in two public bathrooms with very dry cracked skin. Also emptying my own bathroom garbages into my larger kitchen garbage. To say today was easy I’d be lying to myself.
- Date posted
- 6y
L_ark , i too have been in your situation. I actually am even afraid of my own blood sometimes! Lol fun times
- Date posted
- 6y
I didn’t rise axolotl. I washed my hands numerous times and ordered takeout lol. I was defeated it my own ways.
- Date posted
- 6y
Guys we are in this together. I’m avoiding wiping my shoe with Lysol wipes but it’s really making me uncomfortable....same with the floor that it has stepped on. Tomorrow is another day at my job and who knows what “pleasant” stuff I’ll see again. My hands are very dry.
- Date posted
- 6y
Let’s set another goal for Wednesday to continue fighting ocd
- Date posted
- 6y
Update. Went for bloodwork today didn’t pass out. From the sight of the needle box that is lol. Hands were so dry they were bleeding and I didn’t run out of the room like I wanted to. The lady was very nice and accommodating. However her lab coat touched my hand and I didn’t faint lol. I will survive I keep singing to myself hahs
- Date posted
- 6y
Great job everyone! Sounds like you did well with the bloodwork katee. I was lucky today to not see anything gross or triggering but even here ocd finds a way to latch on any possible contaminant around me and setting doubts as usual.
- Date posted
- 6y
Same here l_ark. If there’s a will there’s a way lol
Related posts
- Date posted
- 21w
I obsess constantly about my hands being dirty and feel like I can actually see the germs and bacteria crawling all over my hands if I can’t wash them as soon as I touch something. It’s really embarrassing since people in my life have noticed this “weird” behavior but it’s a huge problem for me and I don’t know how to make the obsessive thoughts stop.
- Date posted
- 21w
(long read ahead, sorry lol) I’ve struggled with ocd for as far back as I can remember. I find that it gets worse with stress, and recently I’ve really been struggling with the contamination aspect of my ocd. I’m worried about it becoming unmanageable and negatively affecting my relationship with my partner. I’ve been living with my boyfriend since January (got kicked out of my house a week after I turned 18, it’s for the better though my house is toxic as hell) and I love living with him, but him and his family aren’t as concerned with cleaning as I am used to. My boyfriend and I have been together going on 2 years and there’s been many times throughout our relationship that his struggle with depression severely impacted his ability to keep up with cleaning his room. This is something I completely understand because I’ve struggled with it too so i’ve often helped him clean, and since i’ve moved in he’s done so much better at keeping up with cleaning (especially because he knows about my issues with clutter, mess, germs, etc.) He is really good at being accommodating towards my needs (not overly so, i’m aware that recovering includes accepting being uncomfortable), but it’s so hard for me to differentiate between what is the normal standard for cleanliness and hygiene and what’s excessive and unhealthy. I get so stressed out every single day over the thought of how dirty everything is. He has 3 cats that mainly stay in his room (he has a catio attached to his window/side of the house) and dogs which stay on the opposite side of the house and backyard, so there is fur everywhere constantly (i’m also allergic to cats but it’s not severe). I can’t stop thinking about how they are getting germs from their litter box all over everything. They also used to piss under his bed and in his closet when his room used to be a mess and it’s soaked into the floor so no matter what it stinks. It’s so hard to bring myself to walk around the house without slippers because my feet will get visibly dirty and my socks would get covered in hair. I always think about how my boyfriend sometimes walks on the rugs in the bathroom in shoes and all the germs that spreads. There’s so many more things but this is already getting long and I am shaking just thinking about how unclean everything is. I want to deep clean the entire house myself so I can get it to where It’s not like psychological torture everyday and it’s easier to maintain but I have been so busy I don’t have the time. I am worried about my boyfriend thinking I don’t like living with him or that I think that’s he’s dirty but i don’t. We have had several conversations about this and he’s reassured me that he knows none of my obsessive thoughts are personal but I still feel so bad about it. I would like to get therapy to help work through this but currently that is not an option for me. I know things will get better once I get through the main things in my life that are causing a lot of stress and therefore making my ocd flair up, but I need advice on what to do in the mean time. I keep having moments where all I can do is shake and cry and clean and I feel bad for my poor boyfriend who can only sit next to me and try to comfort me or help me clean. I also don’t want to make him worried that nothing he does is enough for me (i’ve also already talked to him about this and told him about how I can never even be clean enough for myself and that I don’t think he’s dirty). There’s been many times where I want to tell him to do things that I think might be my own unhealthy compulsions (ex. not wearing shoes in the house or in our room, not getting into bed with socks on, making sure to completely dry off before getting out the shower, put makeup and jewelry back where they belong right after using them, etc.) but i can’t tell if they’re reasonable or not and i try to not tell him unless it’s something that severely distresses me. I’m aware that everything is going to have germs no matter what and have been using NER’s to help manage my thought spirals/rumination. I know that I shouldn’t keep doing compulsions because it just offers temporary relief and makes the problem worse because nothing will ever be enough. I just feeling so overwhelmed and hopeless and exhausted and want some feedback.
- Date posted
- 18w
sorry this is super long i just wanna know if anyone else has been thru something similar bc i feel super alone 🩷 i have super bad contamination ocd. it was bad already but my house was like my safe space until a few months ago someone brought something into my house that i considered ‘contaminated’. and so then i felt like that part of the house was contaminated, then it spread to everything outside my room (since family is moving around touching stuff) and then somehow i got convinced everything in my room except my bed is contaminated and i need to wash my hands after touching it. in my mind its like the contamination just infinitely spreads to things after the tiniest bit of touch. idek what im afraid of anymore or even what the original thing was but i can’t let it go. when i have to wash off contamination i have to wash at least 4 times or until it feels right, or sometimes take rlly long showers and wipe down all my stuff. i even throw away food and clothes or just whole items sometimes because they feel so contaminated i don’t want them in my space. i can’t be super near people or have anyone touch me, and i also can’t bring anything new into my room since it had to go through the entry of my house which feels contaminated. i feel like all i do is lay in bed and then wash my hands and do compulsions so i can go eat or do other stuff around the house. also i never go out because i’m bc people outside make me feel dirty, and i hate thinking about how many people have touched stuff in stores or in public and stuff. so im just in my room worrying all day. i feel so trapped and the contamination/avoiding it is all i think about anymore i barely have time for anything else and im never present when i talk to people because im worrying about if i accidentally got contaminated. im starting erp next week and knowing that im going to have to expose myself to things is really freaking me out. does anyone else have this kind of ocd ? im exhaustedddd 🥲🥲💔
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