Magzzz
- Date posted
- 4y
ttheafterprtyttheafterprty
- Date posted
- 4y
My advice is take a break for you know what and stop completely if you can. You are not a pedophile for having these thoughts, pedophiles relish these things and love them you don’t. Root yourself in love and not lust. Love God and others. Draw near to Him and He will draw near to you.
MagzzzMagzzz
- Date posted
- 4y
Thank you so much. I’ve tried praying and listening to music and it just makes it worse. I feel so guilty
ttheafterprtyttheafterprty
- Date posted
- 4y
@Just Breathe ❤️ Do not worry ok? I’ve been there, you are not a monster. We are just humans with a sinful nature. As St. Paul said ““I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do. And if I do what I do not want to do, I agree that the law is good. As it is, it is no longer I myself who do it, but it is sin living in me.” Romans 7:15-17 and that’s St. Paul the man who visited the 3rd Heaven! Love you man, God bless :)
MagzzzMagzzz
- Date posted
- 4y
@ttheafterprty Thank you but are the thoughts really sin though or are they of the enemy? I’ve always been confused about that. If it’s something that’s out of our control does God forgive us for something we can’t control?
ttheafterprtyttheafterprty
- Date posted
- 4y
@Just Breathe ❤️ Both are out of our control. To be honest, we can never really know if one is from us (OCD brain that is) or the enemy but God will forgive no less. God is merciful to the OCD sufferer. He knows how much love and compassion we need. OCD is not unforgivable, you did not ask for it! Do not worry. ❤️
MagzzzMagzzz
- Date posted
- 4y
@ttheafterprty Thank you friend God bless
PinkRose1111PinkRose1111
- Date posted
- 4y
I have had a similar experience at a bad time with my intrusive thoughts, my partner and I were getting intimate and I was trying not to think of this guy who I had a crush on and trying not to think his name when I had an intrusive thought of ‘wouldnt it be awful if you said your kids name’ and it has totally fucked up my sex life. I am terrified incase I have another intrusive thought during. Just another thing ocd has stolen for me. And to make it worse now whenever I am fantasising about my partner my intrusive thoughts always try to come about my kids because that thought pathway is there. I can’t even listen to some of my fave love songs because of the intrusive thoughts. Like you I am one of the most gentle, kind , good, empathic, sensitive and loving caring people I know and I am tortured with this shit every day. I’m in a spiral right now. Feeling physically sick, utterly hopeless and like I don’t want to be here anymore. To even have thoughts linked with something so abhorrent to me is soul destroying I can’t even explain.
MagzzzMagzzz
- Date posted
- 4y
I totally get how you feel and I’m so sorry you are going through this too. I’m tortured by it too. Mine come up during masturbation and scare me so much. I absolutely hate this theme it truly scares me. But yes I’m just like you too. I know what you are going through. Please know you are not alone and we can get through this.
blueoceanpearlblueoceanpearl
- Date posted
- 4y
Sadly reassurance is what we seek but also what fuels the ocd. However, you must remember that ocd preys on things we would never ever want to do. Keep reminding yourself this and force your brain to stop the loop of worrying. Mental ruminations are still fueling your ocd so you need to shut them down when they come up. Remind yourself—this is just an ocd thought, it has no power over me. You will get through this, I promise.
MagzzzMagzzz
- Date posted
- 4y
Thank you. I just feel so much guilt. How do I deal with the guilt from feeling like I’ve done something terribly wrong?
blueoceanpearlblueoceanpearl
- Date posted
- 4y
@Just Breathe ❤️ I know :( The guilt feels absolutely consuming, I know. When I went through a really bad time this guilt ate at me for months, and I genuinely didn’t know what to do. I ended up taking up running. Not only did it feel good to get exercise but it was also an exposure exercise for me because the places I would run to typically had a lot of families and kids out on walks. At first it caused more anxiety, like exposure therapy does, but it ended up helping me so much. The more I forced myself to perform exposures, the more I felt comfortable in myself and the guilt decreased bit by bit. Stop trying to ruminate on memories trying to figure out if you did something or not. They will only make the ocd worse. The more you look back on past memories the more they will change and your ocd will convince you they are real. Refuse to indulge in this mental checking and focus on reminding yourself it is just some chemical imbalances in your brain! The guilt will subside with this practice.
MagzzzMagzzz
- Date posted
- 4y
@blueoceanpearl Thank you so much. Maybe I could try exercising too and maybe doing things to keep my mind of it. The guilt just consumes me sometimes and it’s so frustrating because I know my morals but my thoughts go against that and it scares me so much. Thank you for your help I truly appreciate it
blueoceanpearlblueoceanpearl
- Date posted
- 4y
@Just Breathe ❤️ Yes, of course. I am always here if you need to talk! I have been through the exact same thing and I remember how horrible it is. Just remember that your ocd is not you...it is just a chemical imbalance in your brain. It will do anything to try and latch on to things that you enjoy doing or things that make you happy. And, people who suffer from this specific subtype of ocd love being around kids—playing with them, teaching them, helping them, raising their children, etc. and these people who suffer from these themes are some of the kindest and most gentle people out there. Don’t let this ocd convince you that you are something you are not. I am so proud of you. Just take it one day at a time, I promise it will get better.
MagzzzMagzzz
- Date posted
- 4y
@blueoceanpearl Thank you so much!
blueoceanpearlblueoceanpearl
- Date posted
- 4y
In the meantime, one of the most important things you can do is keep your body healthy to prevent your brain from becoming a breeding ground for worrying. Make sure you drink lots of water, eat good meals, and try and even get out and workout. Keep your physical body healthy and your mind will follow.
Related posts
bkelp213
- Date posted
- 25w
Can’t function for all my guilt
I’ve done things in the past few years that I’m not proud of - only a couple of things I can think of and they didn’t directly hurt anyone at least with is relieving (but maybe indirectly they sort of did or could’ve which makes me hate myself because why did I do that… *how* could I do that…) If I could back and stop those things from happening, I would. I may not have thought about what I was doing at the time, so I didn’t really recognize that they weren’t okay, but that doesn’t excuse them, and I would smack some sense into my past self if I were able. I feel like if anyone knew what I‘ve done, they wouldn’t want anything to do with me. They’d write me off as worthless. And maybe they should to be honest. Now yet another thing has come up - I haven’t done anything, but I had an intrusive thought pop up that made me *think* about doing something and this would be unforgivable in my opinion. Though, to be honest, the things I’ve done before are also somewhat unforgivable in my opinion… 😞 Regardless, I don’t want to do it because I don’t think it’s okay, but I worry deep down that I do. Or that I’m looking for an excuse to make it okay to do. I don’t know, it’s complicated. And I’m upset I even thought about it. I wish I had never seen the thing that triggered that intrusive thought. Yet another thing I would stop if I could. I’ve tried to not think about it or focus on it, but it doesn’t work. Even if it goes away, it just comes back again. I just keep thinking about it and it’s overwhelming. Anyway all of the guilt of this is killing me. I feel like an irredeemably terrible person and it makes me want to give up. I can’t get on with life because it’s paralyzing. I don’t know what’s wrong with me, and at this point, it feels like I don’t deserve to just move on. I can’t live with myself and I feel like I don’t deserve anything anymore. I know a lot of this is probably OCD, but I’m not sure all of it is and I don’t know what to do… if I spoke to a therapist about it, I don’t think I could bring myself to say what I’ve done or what thoughts I’ve had. But if I was told to move on by someone who didn’t know the truth, I would worry they wouldn’t really say that if they knew. Agh, it’s all just a mess 😞
Anonymousssssss
- Date posted
- 24w
Help
I deal pretty heavily with this. The last couple days, I’ve had what I think are urges. Something pops into my head intrusively and then what stems from that is me WANTING to just indulge in it even though it’s gross. I get worried bc I used to struggle w thoughts about my dad for a long time until eventually I just purposely thought of him while self pleasuring and got off to it. While that’s something I did, it is NOT me. It all stemmed from my mental health declining a couple years back, I was never this way before. So I get worried that it almost happened or might happen with my pocd cuz I could never live with myself if it did.
andrea_sam730
- Date posted
- 24w
Intrusive thoughts during self intimacy
Today has been really hard I feel like I can’t even breathe I feel like a pedo for real :( whenever i think during my alone time i try and coexist with it? but when i decided to think and think i panic and panic more and more i start feel more guilty guys I can’t take this anymore bc when I kinda feel certain it fades aways i think logically i know i probably am ok :( but it’s so scary for me what if i did actually act on the thought and I didn’t realize? And now reflecting it ???
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