- Username
- pavlov
- Date posted
- 5y ago
As an lgbt person with sexual orientation ocd its not based in fear of that thing. Its a lot deeper than that. The thoughts are ego dystonic, which means they go against who you are naturally. Theyre aggressive and painful and they hit you endlessly. Its not an organic transition into finding yourself but rather getting dragged into a constant debate you can never win. Its about your brain basically telling you the sky is green when you can clearly see its blue, and even distorting your memories. Everything becomes painful because youre SO wrapped up in analyzing and doubting that you dont even know what you like anymore and it just makes you feel numb. It feels very against your will, like youre being dragged. Its horrible and torturous, and its not like having a pre disposed prejudice. Some people with hocd could be homophobic, but i think on the whole most people who experience it are not, its just frightening when your identity is threatened so suddenly and seemingly with no reasoning behind it
For example I know I would never ever want to be with a woman, I love my boyfriend so much. However, because I know how much I love my boyfriend and don't want to be with a woman.. I get scared that what if I am in denial and actually like women..
That's okay, please understand that people struggling with this OCD are not homophobic. It is a serious mental illness and these people are victims! I am sure you understand if you suffer from OCD
No. You aren't scared of other gay people unless it is a trigger for your fear of being gay. It is that you know so much that you aren't gay.. that you are scared you are if that makes sense.. and you don't want to be because of how much you aren't therefore the fear arises.
But homophobia is not being afraid of gay people and being gay is not a bad thing
Yeah but that would be an obsession about cheating, not being gay.
It isn't a bad thing but it doesn't mean everyone wants to be gay. We all want to be.. us. I am straight and I want to be, I love my boyfriend I want to be with him till death do us apart.. so I fear that what if I am in denial. It's not about thinking it is wrong.. it is about being scared that you aren't you.. that you are living a lie.. that you don't know yourself.. I luckily recovered from this.. by ignoring those thoughts.. now I luckily have no doubts.. I wish you luck if you are struggling with this please seek therapy!
Nah I'm happily bi but thanks
So, I’m gay, but I have obsessive thoughts about being straight. The idea of being with a man is not something that I find appealing, but a mix of OCD and compulsory heterosexuality causes a lot of anxiety for me. Does anyone else have similar issues? If so, do you have any advice on how to cope?
I’ve never heard of HOCD. When I read about it, it says “fear of being homosexual when you are straight or vice versa,” yet it’s still called “homosexual OCD.” I’m a lesbian and I am having a hard time wrapping my head around this concept because honestly the symptoms sound kind of homophobic? Constantly FEARING you might be gay? I’m trying to think of it from other people’s perspective and trying not to be insensitive, it’s just that when I was questioning my sexuality it’s because I was actually gay, and the symptoms sound a lot like someone just discovering their sexuality but being struck with fear and hiding it. Thoughts?
hey, i have a question to people with obsessions and intrusive thoughts about sexual orientation. i too have a little tiny amount of worries about being any other sexual orientation than i think i am now, but they dont bother me that much. i see a lot of people here have these thoughts in huge portions. my question is, what is it that makes you afraid of it? i know this could seem like a really rude question, but its asked out of curiosity; does it have to do with internalised homophobia? or is it because your current sexuality is very strong and being anything else would completely change your identity? i just wonder a lot
Share your thoughts so the Community can respond