- Date posted
- 4y
- Date posted
- 4y
Could it be backdoor spike?
- Date posted
- 4y
not to reassure, but those silly reels/videos/etc. of people answering your question mean absolutely nothing. they’re literally just people flipping random pages/whatever without any deeper meaning or accuracy whatsoever. don’t let your ocd feed off of these silly things! :) <3 at one point i got really scared about these fortune/answer readings whatever and i’d really panic when i didn’t panic, too — but i think it’s because deep down i knew they were meaningless, you know? some stranger over the internet “answering” a question by randomly flipping a page can’t predict/know whoever it is you are. i hope this helps :)
- Date posted
- 4y
i know and it's like now i can reason with logic? why am i not panicking? i am not even panicking about not panicking
- Date posted
- 4y
It is okay to not panic. Your brain isn’t reacting the way you thought it would, but that is okay. On the other side, would you rather panic? Maybe it is a good thing you are not. I sounds like you are better dealing with thoughts now than what you are expecting, which is progress. I also think it is important to know that even if you are gay or not, there is no reason to worry about that. Now it is much more accepting in society and there are lots of people who you can meet who you will connect with. Overtime I think accepting who you are is a big step. It is very difficult sometimes, but it will give you great comfort in the long run.
- Date posted
- 4y
do you think i am?????
- Date posted
- 4y
@Lilyrosalynd Unfortunately I can’t tell you, but I can tell you that many people worry at some point about being gay. People who are actually gay AND people who are not. I think it is something everyone thinks about it from time to time. But your OCD seems to be triggering it more than others. I would say at some point in your life, it will be very obvious if you are gay or not. It is good that you are trying to learn more about yourself. If I had to give advice, I think the best thing to do would be watch/read other people’s stories about how they knew they were gay. If you can connect with them, it might give some answers. Also think about who you have crushes on (men or women or both). The LGBTQ community is MASSIVE and there are tons of people to listen to on their experiences. It can also offer support if you do decide to “come out”. There is nothing to be scared about either way. Both people who identify as straight and gay find good relationships and happy lives. Just being yourself will give you the most happiness.
- Date posted
- 4y
@hgreen2017 but the thing is i don't want to, that's literally my theme and you're kind of triggering me
Related posts
- Date posted
- 23w
I watched the trailer for the movie “Am I Ok?” and got completely triggered. Basically a 32 yo woman discovers she’s a lesbian seemingly out of nowhere. I was triggers and did some research (bad idea) and apparently some people who are gay have never had romantic or sexual interest in people of the same sex until one spontaneous moment of discovery. Now I’m worried that this could be me!! I’ve never had a long term relationship, have had crushes and fantasies but back out when things get too close for me. I do prefer my little fantasy world guy but now I’m wondering if maybe I missed something and am in denial, even if I didn’t know it.
- Date posted
- 16w
Hey guys, this last week has been pretty rough for me mentally for some reason. Today in particular I’m having a pretty bad episode. For some reason about 30 minutes ago, I randomly started remembering watching the Step Up movies growing up. I remember seeing Channing Tatum in that movie and think he’s attractive, along with some other men I think. Then I started to wonder if that means that I’m into men, because I somewhat remember getting a negative feeling about it from that young age. I looked up on Google if it’s possible to not realize your gay, and the ai thing said yes and started talking about something called latent homosexuality. It also so said that some people start sleeping with a particular before ever actually discovering their sexuality. This makes me want to take a panted homosexual test, or something. Lately I’ve also been wanting to dive into my past with my therapist to try to see where my “ocd” stems from (if I even have it) or if I’m truly gay and have just be conditioned to be straight. I’ve been spiralling guys and I need was honesty and wisdom. Can anybody help me ?
- Date posted
- 15w
Hey everyone, I’m reaching out because I’ve been going through one of the hardest mental spirals of my life, and I’m hoping someone can relate or shed light on what’s happening to me. About 4 months ago, I accidentally came across a trans porn scene. It didn’t do much at the time, but later it triggered this overwhelming intrusive thought: “What if I’m gay?” Since then, it’s been absolute hell. I’ve always been into women—emotionally, sexually, everything. I’ve been in a long-term relationship with a girl I love deeply. But after that moment, my brain started spiraling into nonstop analysis. I began checking how I felt around men, whether I felt attraction, whether I was in denial, whether I was lying to myself. Literally everything became a test. I got stuck in this loop: • A thought pops in → panic • Try to solve it → brief relief • Another thought → worse panic • Repeat. At times, it got so bad I couldn’t feel anything at all—toward my girlfriend, toward women, toward myself. I started doubting everything. Some days, I feel emotionally flat, like I’ve lost my personality. Other days, I wake up with a full-body jolt of “truth” like “I’m definitely gay”—only for it to fade into numbness again. I’ve also noticed that I get short bursts of peace when I stop reacting, but then the fear comes back louder, like “See? Now you’re accepting it. That means it’s true.” Therapy hasn’t helped much so far—it felt more like general counseling. They told me to sit with the thoughts, but didn’t clarify if this was OCD, identity questioning, or trauma. That just made it worse because now I’m back to thinking “What if I’m just rejecting my truth?” I’m exhausted. I’ve lost connection to everything I used to love. • I want to love my girl again the way I used to • I want to feel desire without overthinking • I want to trust myself again I’m not looking for reassurance—I just want to know if anyone else has gone through something like this, and if this sounds like HOCD or identity OCD. Thanks for reading.
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