FUCK i really REALLYneed help. Been overthinking. My fucking cousins have lice and they’re contagious right? Well I contracted and I’ve been doing everything to get them out but my cousins are lazy and won’t exert the same effort. I thought I was free from if, turns out I still have it bc I found a big one. I’m FREAKING out. My friends and I are close and I just worry I might have given it to them too and I’m gonna cause an outbreak. I feel so guilty and like i have to confess to them incase they do have it so they can take precautionary measures so we wont be passing lice to each othef but at the same time i kind of dont want to because im so scared they’ll avoid me or not be as close much I’m 19, lices are for kids. I feel so ashamed and embarrassed i dont know what to do

This is a long one lol but basically, a couple of weeks ago I went to the toilet (#2, sorry for the tmi). Let's just say it was messy. I remember that a speck of.. #2.. Fell off the piece of toilet paper. This was probably the worst thing that could ever happen. I can't remember clearly but I'm pretty sure my jeans were on the floor underneath near where the speck could have fallen. There was also a towel. I don't know exactly where it fell as it was so small, but I made sure both the towel and the jeans went in the laundry basket and I cleaned the floor near there. Fast forward to like the next day. My mum does most of the laundry, so she will have picked up all the towels and clothes from the laundry basket and taken them to the wash. The problem is the speck. I don't know where it went but if it was on the towel and she picked it up.... Thus, contaminated mum. And she also puts clothes away that are dry. I remember that day she put my hoodie in my wardrobe, and I haven't worn it since because I feel it is contaminated. I haven't worn the clothes that have touched the hoodie. This leaves me with not a lot of clothes. And today I finally snapped and picked up a sweatshirt that had maybe touched the hoodie. And now I'm just sat here spiralling, wearing it. What if it touched the speck? What if the speck touched my mum and then touched the hoodie which then touched the sweatshirt I'm wearing? Please I'm so scared.

My ocd has been at an extreme all time high the past 2 weeks and I am in dire need of some relief. I’m not sleeping right anymore. for context: I live in the south and found a springtail on my sheets about 2 weeks ago. This was like 2 days before our bug guy came and sprayed (it’s a normal maintenance thing here) so it’s a common bug down here and I’ve found them all over different areas of the house before. Finding it in my bed sent me on a bit of a spiral bc I started to doubt if it even was a springtail and that i was wrong and that it was a bed bug, not trusting my brain. It was a bad, sleepless night and carried over continuing feelings. Typical ocd stuff. Well two days later, I’m a nurse and I had a patient that actually had bed bugs. This wasn’t the first day they were here and I did not see any myself but it still freaked me out. There had one 2 founds after visitors came the day before. Of course I wore PPE in the room (coveralls shoe covers and hair net) going in and took everything off before exiting the room. When I came home I stripped in my garage and bagged everything down to my shoes. Threw everything in the wash and did multiple cycles. There were no other steps I could take but I still had a terrible night. Hours of ruminating and going back and forth about tracing my tracks, thinking of new ways I could’ve taken one home with me. Just checking everything. I was already on a spiral from the springtail. Having two such back to back triggering events for me so closely related has made me deteriorate significantly. I was already doing bad with my normal OCD and starting therapy here. I obsess over the thought of having bedbugs constantly and haven’t been able to sleep. I am constantly checking my bed while in it and can’t settle down. My bed is heavy too and I keep hurting myself lifting my mattress to check. But I need to check. I’ve become obsessed. I check everything and go down Reddit rabbit holes looking for new things. And of course, I talk myself into it every time. I can’t take it anymore, it’s bleeding off into other parts of my life like friendship and marriage because I am so high anxiety right now. I need relief so bad. I’ve never felt this unstable to be honest. I feel like even someone without ocd would be really struggling with this topic, nevermind me, with ocd to a point where I just started treatment. These aren’t even my normal intrusive thoughts and compulsive acts. It’s just taken on a life in the last week and I can’t find any sign that it’s going to slow down. when I think rationally I know I did everything right to prevent but I can’t shake it. 💔

So Im staying at my uncles house until Saturday or Sunday and I feel like I’m filthy and making his house infected and idk what to do so when I first got here his house had grass I walked through to get to the door so I made sure to wipe my feet at the door and leave my shoes close to the door but I still feel,like I’m infecting his house he gave me and my little brother a room to sleep in and the first think I think of is how I need to wash the sheets when I leave. The first day was hard because I couldn’t shower and I felt so dirty because we had to go on a walk and I was sweating and we also had to water the grass outside and I had the same socks on as I did yesterday and I just felt like they were filthy and I was walking with those socks around the house so now his carpet is filthy and the bed I was laying in is now filthy. And I couldn’t shower because I didn’t have any cleaning supplies to clean it after I was done because I didn’t want to wash in their shower and now clean it afterwards. But I got someone at the store and took a shower and changed clothes and I felt weird about where to put my dirty clothes I hung them on the shower curtain rod but I feel like I just infected the rod. And afterwards I tried to spray off the shower with some Clorox foam cleaner but I feel like I didn’t clean it good and even feel bad about cleaning it because I was afraid the chemicals I tried rinsing off the shower and the bottles I was using in the shower but still feel like it’s infected. And don’t get me started on how I feel about the bags I’m keeping my clean clothes in and also the other bag I’m keeping my dirty clothes the bags are laying on the floor and I feel like my clean clothes are getting dirty from the floor and my dirty clothes are dirtying the floor and the towel I was using I used to dry the bathroom floor and asked where to put my towel he said on the dryer but there was stuff on it so I put it on a box above the dryer but I feel like I just infected everything and also Ik he touched the towel WHST if he gets THISE germs on his kids . Also the covers me and my little brother were using fell on the ground and his kids were playing in them and stuff like that but my little brother said it was fine and still used them but idk and his cover he brought touched my dirty clothes and the floor and he still used them and I just feel kinda ill about that. And today me feeling filthy just multiplied because I can’t SHOWER again today because someone’s toys are in the shower and idk how to get clean becuase we leave soon and idk what to do do I just change clothes? Idk about wipes because I can’t just ask for baby wipes and now I’m walking around with no socks because I only brought one pair and my others ones were put in my dirty clothes bag and now I have to go places no socks just in my flip flops. And last night I went to the restroom because I didn’t want to have an accident in the night because I’m always anxious about that stuff and I went but I feel like I just infected their toilet and I washed my hands after but I went back into bed but my feet touched the bathroom floor so now the bed is hay I feel actually infected and since I’m laying in it I’m infected too. Idk why I woke up so depressed and feel so filthy and guilty idk if it was the pose I was sleeping in or if I think I had an accident idk but we a lot of places to go today and idk what to do I was going to get Lysol at the store today to spray stuff but I don’t think I can get everything and I feel so sick he has kids what if I give them bad germs I can’t live with that