I‘ve had relationship OCD before, but mostly just in very short episodes. However it has been very present in the past weeks and it’s been very hard to deal with since my boyfriend is kind of my safe space and helps me calm down, but now I feel like OCD is pushing me away even from him

Relationship OCD

hiitsemmy

Date posted: 4y

You could explain to him the issue if you’re comfortable. OCD makes it feel like it’s something wrong with him but it’s not.

hiitsemmy

Date posted: 4y

I’ve been there. I couldn’t tell whether it was my relationship OCD or whether he actually wasn’t “the one.” I still don’t know. Loosing your libido is very normal after awhile but if that frightens you, you could talk to him about it. I suggest talking out of any other option. He can get to know you and how your brain is working so he can recognize when something is wrong. It’s extremely difficult and scary but it’s something you’re strong enough to do.

Anonymous

Date posted: 4y

I fear that he will misunderstand my OCD for doubting the relationship

Anonymous

Date posted: 4y

Thanks for making me feel understood

hiitsemmy

Date posted: 4y

@Anonymous I was scared of that too. I didnt tell him the most gruesome parts of my OCD. For example, I wouldn’t tell him how I always questioned if the relationship was wrong, or how I could never stop questioning if I actually liked him. You do want to spare them in some way so that you don’t hurt them. Unless there is a fundamental issue, don’t tell them about the doubts that OCD feeds you. Explain to him how OCD makes you feel, and don’t over load. Give him a chance to ask questions if he wants

Anonymous

Date posted: 4y

I just watched a video on how to tell whether something is relationship OCD or wisdom, and it named traits that show you it’s wisdom (e.g. that it will always be a quiet voice in the back of your mind) and now I’m spiraling and convincing myself that it really is wisdom and not OCD. It’s the same pattern with every episode: I tell myself that THIS TIME it’s real, because some part feels different than last time and thus is not OCD.

Anonymous

Date posted: 4y

I needed to get this off my chest. Glad if anyone can help.

vegasgirl

Date posted: 4y

You could show him a video. Awaken into love on YouTube has a video for the partners so someone with ROCD

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