- Date posted
- 3y
- User type
- NOCD Alumni
- Date posted
- 3y
Hi Nothingtosay, my false memories are mostly tied to real events, but sometimes they may of an event that I’m not really sure if it truly happened or not. The ones tied to real events, have been either where I’m not exactly sure of the details, outcomes, individuals involved, etc…but I pretty much know the overall gist, or like you said it may be that there’s a hazy or missing part of the memory. The latter are usually the worst for me, because my mind can come up with some doozies and I have no foundation to keep it grounded. I have found that with either case for me, real or possibly never happened at all event, that the more I think about or try to revisit the event, the more distorted and foggy it becomes as my OCD keeps adding more and more lenses of doubt over the original memory. The best way I deal with it is ERP and remembering that no amount of dwelling on these events will change them, whether they happened or not, and continue to dwell only feeds the OCD bully the doubt it wants. Try to hang in there, stay strong and best wishes.
- Date posted
- 3y
Physical symptoms or mental symptoms?
- Date posted
- 3y
Mental symptoms
- Date posted
- 3y
@Nothingtosay My major fear is inflicting harm on my mother. I love her so it's pretty sad to think I could harm her. It makes me cry over and over again. My head hurts, it's like a worm moving all over my brain. Today for example my anxiety has decreased a lot using a little bit of mindfulness.
- Date posted
- 3y
When I have dealt with fears of false memory, its when I imagine a very distressing scenario of something bad I may have done. I then get confused over whether I just made the bad memory up or if it's actually real and I'd just been ignoring it. It wouldn't make much sense for me to act in a way that would really go against my values, but I still worry that I may have done the bad actions. It's all kind of confusing really. To get over it I try to not excessively ruminate over the question, and just go with the memory that I actually believe is real rather than the one I'm afraid is real.
- Date posted
- 3y
It's really sad. When I finally ignore the thoughts my OCD is sneaky and tells me: "so you're ok thinking that? You're evil."
- Date posted
- 3y
@elkis503 - I can feel gulity too when I trying to avoid compulsions. It feels like I'm ignoring something that I shouldn't be avoiding.
- Date posted
- 3y
@Wes8 Any tips that worked for you?
- Date posted
- 3y
@elkis503 - I resending my reply, didn't work right the first time: Hmm....over time many of my specific false memory fears decreased in intensity, which I'm sure was due to the fact that I tried to not interact with the thoughts with rumination or mental checking. I'm affected by a couple different subtypes of ocd, but they all are usually involved with mental ocd compulsions. Once I figured out I had ocd and learned about erp, I tried to stop ruminating with any of my ocd fears. I still definitely fall in some of the compulsive behavior but others have gotten easier to resist over time. So yeah, my tip would be to use erp strategies like resisting rumination. It's hard, but it does help.
Related posts
- Date posted
- 23w
I got pure o. I don't think that's really the correct term but you get what i'm talking about. I would say that i have it because my ocd just picks and chooses what subtype it wants to bother with me today. Right now, i'm suffering with real event ocd and, hopefully, false memories. But i think i might have cracked the code on it. So my real events and false memories are pretty much private related, which makes it worse because there's no evidence or proof. There are some memories (real events) i can think about and accept that they happened. I still feel guilt and shame but i have closure from it. And there's the other memories (hopefully false memories) that i look at and just cannot wrap my head around. They feel so real like they actually happened and it gives me so much stress, but i sit there and think and think and think on it to see if it actually happened. Btw, these false memories come from my real events but in different situations and times. Like if it was true, i would accept it. Whether or not it made me feel guilt or shame, i would still accept it happened. This is what i think i figured out. I can look at a memory and know for certain it happened. I don't need evidence or nothing. The false memories make me question myself if it did happen. It's still very vivid and looks so real like a real memory, but i just can't be for certain if i did that. It makes me feel like i'm in denial of my past. Sometimes they both work together. A real event can happen but false memories can use its work to detail out the event, tryna make it much worse than it was. Or you can be thinking of a false memory but real events can try linking with that false memory to making you think you did do that. If this makes any sense or if what i’m saying is correct or i’m just crazy, please tell me. All advice is welcome. Thank you
- Date posted
- 22w
Has false memory OCD affected you so badly that you feel that a lot of your memories period are unclear, vague, fuzzy and can’t recall correctly?
- Date posted
- 18w
I experience crippling, debilitating false memory OCD. It started with a “what if” thought 6 days ago and has spiraled into a never ending loop. My mind is telling me that “maybe you did this terrible, awful, unforgivable thing years ago and you don’t remember it and it’s only a matter of time before it catches up to you and your life is over” I’m really needing some coping mechanisms and support. I’m really scared and my body is exhausted. I just want it to stop. It is full panic attack all day, every day. Please if anyone can relate or help me.
Be a part of the largest OCD Community
Share your thoughts so the Community can respond