- Date posted
- 3y
- Date posted
- 3y
Hi! I have rocd, but I want to share this anyway! I'm not completely out of rocd; to be honest. But oh boy if it is SUPER BETTER NOW! I passed 2 months where I keep having thoughts, guilt, anxiety all over my head and me. I literally couldnt feel nothing else. Than I find out about rocd, & started to see a psychologist. Two more months passed, and they were very hard. But here I am now. I can feel everything again! I learned how to treat ocd doubts; they don't scare me anymore!! Sometimes I still struggle to recognise them, that's true! But I assure you, give yourself more time, keep trying, and you will see that things can get really better!! Everyone is different and everyone has their time. But don't lose hope!! I know you can learn to control all of this, it is possible and you will achieve that!!
- Date posted
- 3y
Thank you <3
- Date posted
- 3y
You're not ruining anything. You have a condition that you never asked for and that us affecting you negatively. Your boyfriend deserves someone strong enough to battle their own brain and someone that cares enough about them to worry about them despite the mental struggle their partner is going through. That someone is you. You care about him to worry about him and how this is affecting him when he's not going through it directly unlike yourself. You're not a fraud, even though it may feel like it because ocd is a liar and cos it's a mental condition in your brain, it feels so real. I can't say if it will last forever, but if you hold on to how strong you are and that you never asked for ocd which is lying to you, it should help you keep your strength up :)
- Date posted
- 3y
Thank you so much for saying all these things.my ocd has been at an all time high lately and it has felt like I'm bottling it all up with no one to talk to about it, there's only so much I can tell my bf without confessing compulsively etc, so your comment just means a lot to me. <3
- Date posted
- 3y
It hasn’t been letting up for me since may of 2020... I just hope I have OCD... I don’t ever wanna be my intrusive thoughts...
- Date posted
- 3y
I understand how you feel. Have you tried erp?
- Date posted
- 3y
Yeah, I did nocd several months ago and went through the whole program
- Date posted
- 3y
@Whatabtme Can you try erp again? You mention intrusive thoughts. I found this book helpful with regard to that. Overcoming Unwanted Intrusive Thoughts: A CBT-Based Guide to Getting Over Frightening, Obsessive, or Disturbing Thoughts https://www.amazon.com/dp/1626254346/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_glt_fabc_VTGZAVERHSXRHJ7RVF33?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 3y
you for sure need to lean away from those compulsions! don't get trapped inside of them. ruminating will not rationalize the thoughts, it will only send you further down the rabbit hole. try to take a few extra minutes a day to prevent those ruminations. instead of rationalizing the anxiety, sit with it. learn to write down the one thing in these thoughts that bother you and say "ok this is it" and don't push yourself further for answers! let it go. you got this!
Related posts
- Date posted
- 25w
Idk if this post is even worth it but it seemed like a normal day for me, called off work due to the weather so I get to just stay home and play games all day. Easy day besides dealing with the constant and unbearable battle with my intrusive thoughts/feelings. Took a shower and I just had constant thoughts, (heart palpitations are pretty constant) ended up breaking down and bawling my eyes out. I was diagnosed with HOCD and ROCD about 2 months ago and since it's just gotten worse. It feels as real as it can get and after talking to my girlfriend about the anxiety attack, it feels even more real. I have no desire or enjoyment from what comes from my brain, and at this point I'm on my knees begging the big man upstairs for my old life back, how do I go from being obsessed with women (sexually and emotionally) to pretty much doing a 180 overnight (with the obvious anxiety and worry behind it. No real desire obviously). I'm just at a loss, I've done a little ERP and it seemed to help with the brain fog but besides that, everything that it does to someone, I have. And again there's the doubt I even have OCD and I'm in straight denial. It just sucks.
- Date posted
- 20w
I’ve completely lost myself. I can’t focus on my studies, I can’t go to the gym. Dang it I can’t even be around my male friends normally anymore. I got no idea why or how this happened but the only thing I know for sure is that I never questioned my sexuality neither doubted it. I never cared in general. I just liked girls. I keep testing and keep testing and keep testing my arousal but no matter how many times I see but I don’t feel the same way for guys that I do with girls my mind will always try to make me believe that I am gay. It’s like it’s forcing me into an identity I never asked for. But at the end of the day like my psychologist told me. Sexuality doesn’t change. So since I never felt anything for guys in my life it’s ocd. I’ve been up and down for 5 months now and while the last week I was feeling way better. Monday now and I’m back to zero. I just want to go back when everything was normal. I can’t keep living with this.
- Date posted
- 13w
So my OCD has been bad lately. I’ve been ruminating and obsessing over my sexuality again. And it just keeps getting worse. I hate it so much. I try to sit with the discomfort but then my ocd does the backdoor spike. And the groinal response is what keeps me looped. It SUCKS. I am not attracted to men, but my OCD is trying SO hard to convince me that I am. There have been days where I’m just so mentally exhausted that I “accept” what my ocd tells me and I just walk around a hollow, lethargic shell. But then I rethink it and I feel better. It feels like I can only find my TRUE self when I tire my nervous system out enough that it literally breaks down and has me suicidal and hopeless. And then accepting my OCD’s “truth” (that I’m attracted to men) feels like a burden and a chore. I woke up today from an OCD dream, tried to go back to sleep, and my stomach kept cramping bc I was so anxious and ruminating over my intrusive thoughts. I’m starting to doubt it being OCD anymore. My brain is too tired to fight and cry about it anymore.
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