- Date posted
- 3y
- Date posted
- 3y
Hi! I have rocd, but I want to share this anyway! I'm not completely out of rocd; to be honest. But oh boy if it is SUPER BETTER NOW! I passed 2 months where I keep having thoughts, guilt, anxiety all over my head and me. I literally couldnt feel nothing else. Than I find out about rocd, & started to see a psychologist. Two more months passed, and they were very hard. But here I am now. I can feel everything again! I learned how to treat ocd doubts; they don't scare me anymore!! Sometimes I still struggle to recognise them, that's true! But I assure you, give yourself more time, keep trying, and you will see that things can get really better!! Everyone is different and everyone has their time. But don't lose hope!! I know you can learn to control all of this, it is possible and you will achieve that!!
- Date posted
- 3y
Thank you <3
- Date posted
- 3y
You're not ruining anything. You have a condition that you never asked for and that us affecting you negatively. Your boyfriend deserves someone strong enough to battle their own brain and someone that cares enough about them to worry about them despite the mental struggle their partner is going through. That someone is you. You care about him to worry about him and how this is affecting him when he's not going through it directly unlike yourself. You're not a fraud, even though it may feel like it because ocd is a liar and cos it's a mental condition in your brain, it feels so real. I can't say if it will last forever, but if you hold on to how strong you are and that you never asked for ocd which is lying to you, it should help you keep your strength up :)
- Date posted
- 3y
Thank you so much for saying all these things.my ocd has been at an all time high lately and it has felt like I'm bottling it all up with no one to talk to about it, there's only so much I can tell my bf without confessing compulsively etc, so your comment just means a lot to me. <3
- Date posted
- 3y
It hasn’t been letting up for me since may of 2020... I just hope I have OCD... I don’t ever wanna be my intrusive thoughts...
- Date posted
- 3y
I understand how you feel. Have you tried erp?
- Date posted
- 3y
Yeah, I did nocd several months ago and went through the whole program
- Date posted
- 3y
@Whatabtme Can you try erp again? You mention intrusive thoughts. I found this book helpful with regard to that. Overcoming Unwanted Intrusive Thoughts: A CBT-Based Guide to Getting Over Frightening, Obsessive, or Disturbing Thoughts https://www.amazon.com/dp/1626254346/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_glt_fabc_VTGZAVERHSXRHJ7RVF33?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 3y
you for sure need to lean away from those compulsions! don't get trapped inside of them. ruminating will not rationalize the thoughts, it will only send you further down the rabbit hole. try to take a few extra minutes a day to prevent those ruminations. instead of rationalizing the anxiety, sit with it. learn to write down the one thing in these thoughts that bother you and say "ok this is it" and don't push yourself further for answers! let it go. you got this!
Related posts
- Date posted
- 20w
So my OCD has been bad lately. I’ve been ruminating and obsessing over my sexuality again. And it just keeps getting worse. I hate it so much. I try to sit with the discomfort but then my ocd does the backdoor spike. And the groinal response is what keeps me looped. It SUCKS. I am not attracted to men, but my OCD is trying SO hard to convince me that I am. There have been days where I’m just so mentally exhausted that I “accept” what my ocd tells me and I just walk around a hollow, lethargic shell. But then I rethink it and I feel better. It feels like I can only find my TRUE self when I tire my nervous system out enough that it literally breaks down and has me suicidal and hopeless. And then accepting my OCD’s “truth” (that I’m attracted to men) feels like a burden and a chore. I woke up today from an OCD dream, tried to go back to sleep, and my stomach kept cramping bc I was so anxious and ruminating over my intrusive thoughts. I’m starting to doubt it being OCD anymore. My brain is too tired to fight and cry about it anymore.
- Date posted
- 8w
I don't usually post on here because it could end up becoming a compulsion or could be seen as reassurance seeking but I think I just need a place to vent and to also get some encouragement and peer support. I am really struggling with my intrusive thoughts and feelings today. All of it feels extremely real and convincing. Right now, I feel thoroughly convinced that I have already identified as either a lesbian or bisexual. I have been diagnosed with OCD by both a psychiatrist and a psychologist years ago and I still feel convinced that it isn't OCD. I keep feeling as if I am just using OCD as a cover-up / as an excuse to deny my “actual” sexual orientation / to hide the “fact that I'm actually lesbian / bisexual”. I have been practicing ERP whenever my schedule allows but it's tough... ERP typically works for me but on days like today, it doesn't seem to be working and that makes me doubt if I have OCD or not. At the same time, I am also convinced that ERP isn't working and I am secretly in denial / struggle with comphet / have internalised homophobia (which makes it worse because my family is homophobic and most of my intrusive thoughts have been targeting that / using that as evidence). Feeling really scared and hopeless... 😞
- Date posted
- 8w
Hello, so I’ve been struggling really badly with so-ocd where I am worried that I’m not actually straight when that’s what I’ve always thought and wanted to be. I’ve been with my boyfriend for about 2.5 years now, he’s my first boyfriend and I really love him so much and want to spend the rest of my life with him. I remember one time, before I had struggles with so-ocd, I had a thought along the lines of ‘what if I’m missing out on other men by staying with him’ and it didn’t really cause any anxiety but I felt quite guilty for thinking that. But I moved on. However, right now I’m in the depths of so-ocd it started back in March I believe, and today I had a thought along the lines of ‘what if I never get the opportunity to try being with a woman because I’m in a relationship with a man’ and that has really set me off today. I’ve had a meltdown over it, my chest feels heavy and it felt so real like I actually wanted it and I had a feeling of wanting to be gay even though that’s not what I want in life. Why is this happening to me and I feel so horrible for thinking this like it felt like it was me and not the ocd and that I’m just lying to myself and my boyfriend. I’ve tried scrolling on here to see if anyone has had a similar thought or experience and I am aware that this is reassurance seeking but I just need someone to tell me that I’m okay
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