My therapist said to be that she wasn’t sure if I have ROCD on my call to her yesterday and now I feel really anxious! I love my boyfriend I desperately want things to work out between us but my obsession is I worry that I’m not attracted to him like the spark is missing. The more I get to know him the closer I feel to him and I adore him. No he’s not my usual type and I think In the beginning this held me back getting close to him as I had a very strict idea of what I wanted and I would always discount anyone who fit didn’t fit that type without getting to know them (shallow yes)! But with him I’ve fallen in love with non superficial things but this past idea of ‘type’ is stopping me from being completely vulnerable as I think I’ve conditioned myself to believe it’s wrong as it isn’t the person I imagined myself being with in my head. Like if things are going well I tell myself ‘ don’t fool yourself you’re only going to hurt him in the long run cause he’s not your type deep down.’ I worry about what other people will think , like I worry about people making negative comments about him and I hate that I care about that. I’ve always cared what other people think of me too much and now I’ve projected this onto my boyfriend. In the past I’ve never properly loved someone as I always selfishly picked someone who I thought looked good next to me kind of thing , I haven’t had many serious relationships where I’ve shown my true self it’s been all about flirting and proving to myself that I was good enough to be with that person to be honest. With my boyfriend it’s so different we know each other so well we have so much in common and I just need some advice now :(

I was dating a girl that was absolutely perfect for me and I let thoughts that “I wasn’t attracted enough to her” ruin our relationship because I was always checking to make sure I was attracted to her all of the time. She is an absolutely beautiful girl and I regret letting my ocd ruin something so very special, because our love was one of a kind. I don’t know if this is the “type” you are talking about, but regardless, I would suggest looking at these thoughts as OCD and just trying to stay present with him and enjoy the relationship you share. There is no “perfect” person that we like to shape in our head, but it sounds like you found the person that is right for you. OCD will try to dissect any part of the relationship or our significant other to make you feel like it’s not “perfect” and therefore isn’t right. I hope this helps and I hope you can stay present and enjoy your relationship with the person that makes you happy. Don’t let OCD take it from you, you deserve happiness.

Im happily engaged to someone who I was often scared wasn’t my “type.” He is, however, the best human and partner I could imagine for myself. His smile lights up a room and his energy is so contagious. It’s natural to feel more attracted to your partner some times more than others—that’s just being human. That said, you aren’t just choosing someone for how they look. You’re choosing someone for who they are and how they complement you 💜

It could be worth your while explaining to your therapist next time how distressed you felt about the possibility of not having Rocd, and it is also an option to request a new therapist if they aren't the correct fit for you Relationship obsessions I find are extremely hard to explain, because the thoughts aren't as bizarre as other ocd themes (in my personal experience, don't want to speak for everyone) and also genuine relationship issues can get mixed in with all the ocd mess, so i would try explain how your thoughts/feelings/doubts make you feel distressed and against what you believe you want Hope this helps 😊

Yes she is a therapist from the NOCD app... and yes I understand:)