I have this image that comes to my mind without a warning. In this Image, I touch a child inappropiately to an inappropiate area. Im not afraid of doing something bad to a child, but Im afraid of this image because it brings along the high anxiety as it makes me doubt if I d i d something bad. It feels almost true. Because of this I used to avoid changing nappies, washing our baby etc. My compulsion was, and somewhat still is, avoidance of certain situations+ rumination. Have noticed counting to be one as well (almost like keeping track of time, or mind busy when being in a situation that I know the image may pop in my head) Have learned to avoid both of these but after the image Im left with anxiety, which turns to sadness, feeling very low. I used to have these daily when our child was a baby and still when she was a toddler, now the image comes may be once in two weeks. Still every time Im left with this same lowness. I had this kind of moment yesterday and again it feels almost true- what if I did touch her. Does anybody have similar situation? Also, if there is professional on the line, I would like to start Erp. I don't know how to proceed without support. Thank you beforehand for any advice.

I hope it gets better for you, I don’t have a ton of advice cause I’m still struggling myself, just wanted to let u know ur not alone

You have the same kind that the image popps in your head without warning and then as if you would not know whether it was real or unreal? In a way I know it is ocd,but the "what if" scenario starts to roll and feeds it even more. Thank you so much for replying <3

I understand, I feel sadness also after having inappropriate sexual or harm ocd thoughts. Maybe it all stems from repressed sadness... It’s just feels mean.

thank you for your words<3

You are not alone in this. I have been struggling with this SO much. I have irrational thoughts about harming children too, and I know that I don’t want to do anything like that at all, but I’ll worry and worry and obsess over things and wonder if I actually did harm a child. I worry about it when I babysit my little cousin. I know that I never actually want to do anything bad to a kid but I cannot get the worry out of my head. It’s exhausting

rasa: a big thank you for replying <3 Do you get them in certain situations or randomly? Im seeing a therapist but not ocd- specialist. Books, info has helped a lot to understand the way ocd works but have not found many that would have described their symptoms to be this kind. so thank you very much for replying!

I’m going through something similar but I wish mine were just thoughts they also come with feelings.. so I’ve always been a sexual person since a child I used to hump things etc which is natural. I’m getting these images now of me like humping children and it’s nothing ever more extreme cause I can’t deal with those images but it makes me feel like I want to do it cause of the sexual feelings even though I’m reality I would never hurt or use a child like that. I’m trying erp but these feelings are still so hard to handle

I understand. Very demanding things to go through! Have you listened to Chrissie Hodges in Ocd podcast about so called "groinal effect"? If not, I truly recommend it,it could give you understanding of what you are experiencing . thank you for replying <3

No I haven’t but I will! Thank you and thank you for letting me share

thank you! Go and listen to it, you are not alone in this one either<3

checked it, and it was called "groinal response"

Thank you!