- Date posted
- 6y
- Date posted
- 6y
Guys.. this is all reassurance. You don't have to accept what your intrusive thoughts said, just accept they are intrusive. "I'm this now." This is only another way of seeing how dissapointed you are with the thought. This is only going to hurt you
- Date posted
- 6y
and also, I totally understand. The anxiety aspect of my OCD used to be way worse and now I often feel nothing when they occur, and I was wondering why too. Completely normal, your mind has just gotten used to the feeling.
- Date posted
- 6y
@lann with me, my naturally strong sex drive goes way down during OCD flare ups. All the mental testing, review etc added in with intrusive thoughts is a poor aphrodisiac ?Though sometimes I do appreciate being less attracted to women just for the sake of it not weighing on my interactions with them as not to over or under value people for a superficial thing.
- Date posted
- 6y
I imagine it with the same sex.there is this pain in my chest.sometimes it gives me anxiety.but sometimes it feel like yes i am gay and this is what i wanted.and that all the attraction that i had till now for the opposite sex was fake.sometimes it does feel that i have accepted the truth and am happy with it but it again gives me anxiety.i am reassuring about it all day long. Previously i mean as a girl i felt good if a boy had crush on me but now it will make me feel uncomfortable thinking that this is not who i am.i should not entertain the idea of a boy having a crush on me!
- Date posted
- 6y
Im in the exact same spot. I feel anxiety and displeasure when i think about women, and my brain is still telling me im repressing it. When i think about being sexual with them i just get so anxious and upset i could cry. I feel nothing towards them and when i look at pictures of women i cant even place what id say was attractive at all. My attraction to men comes and goes. Like a wave. For a long time though it was totally gone. I felt so awful. It just doesnt make any sense to me. I know the anxiety and the pre-occupation with the ocd thoughts put attraction into standby, it just sucks when i try and think about men and it just tells me "no you cant do that anymore."
- Date posted
- 6y
Yes its still OCD. Youre self testing without knowing it by trying to see how you feel when you accept what your thoughts are telling you is the truth. This can actually be used as ERP though. Just like straight people enjoy thinking about being with the opposite sex, gay people enjoy thinking about the same sex. Hope this helped:)
Related posts
- Date posted
- 24w
I’ve tried accepting the uncertainty, I’ve accepted I may be gay, bi or still straight. I’ve tried doing ERP myself to the best I can. When I accept that I’m gay or bi why doesn’t my head agree and move on? Why does it still question it? I know I don’t want to be at all. I love my family. But I just want this to move on. I want to enjoy life. Why can’t I find women attractive again? (Brief moments I do). I seriously don’t understand the false attraction? I’ve tried agreeing with it but it won’t let this drop. Why am I attracted to the same sex? Why am I attracted to people I would never thought of looking at? Why does it give me such grief about this? I know I shouldn’t look at adult content but why can I only feel good watching either lesbian or females? I tried to agree with the gay but it makes me sick and horrendous I even considered this? I just want my life back.
- Date posted
- 13w
Hey everyone, I’m reaching out because I’ve been going through one of the hardest mental spirals of my life, and I’m hoping someone can relate or shed light on what’s happening to me. About 4 months ago, I accidentally came across a trans porn scene. It didn’t do much at the time, but later it triggered this overwhelming intrusive thought: “What if I’m gay?” Since then, it’s been absolute hell. I’ve always been into women—emotionally, sexually, everything. I’ve been in a long-term relationship with a girl I love deeply. But after that moment, my brain started spiraling into nonstop analysis. I began checking how I felt around men, whether I felt attraction, whether I was in denial, whether I was lying to myself. Literally everything became a test. I got stuck in this loop: • A thought pops in → panic • Try to solve it → brief relief • Another thought → worse panic • Repeat. At times, it got so bad I couldn’t feel anything at all—toward my girlfriend, toward women, toward myself. I started doubting everything. Some days, I feel emotionally flat, like I’ve lost my personality. Other days, I wake up with a full-body jolt of “truth” like “I’m definitely gay”—only for it to fade into numbness again. I’ve also noticed that I get short bursts of peace when I stop reacting, but then the fear comes back louder, like “See? Now you’re accepting it. That means it’s true.” Therapy hasn’t helped much so far—it felt more like general counseling. They told me to sit with the thoughts, but didn’t clarify if this was OCD, identity questioning, or trauma. That just made it worse because now I’m back to thinking “What if I’m just rejecting my truth?” I’m exhausted. I’ve lost connection to everything I used to love. • I want to love my girl again the way I used to • I want to feel desire without overthinking • I want to trust myself again I’m not looking for reassurance—I just want to know if anyone else has gone through something like this, and if this sounds like HOCD or identity OCD. Thanks for reading.
- Date posted
- 12w
I really need help understanding what I’m going through. For a long time now, I’ve been struggling with thoughts and feelings about women that confuse and scare me. Sometimes I feel this strange emotional or mental ‘pull’ toward certain women — it’s not exactly sexual, and not clearly romantic either, but it feels like something, and it triggers deep anxiety. When I see a beautiful woman or a WLW (woman-loving-woman) couple, I feel something that I can’t explain — sometimes I think it’s just admiration or aesthetic appreciation, but OCD keeps telling me: “You felt something, so you must be gay,” or “You’re hiding something.” I get stuck in endless loops, trying to analyze these moments and label them. Even when I feel physical or emotional reactions, they don’t feel natural or aligned with who I am. They feel like a reaction to the idea of women, not real attraction. I try to be honest with myself — I even told a friend I might be bisexual at some point, just to test if that felt more comfortable. But it didn’t. It made things worse, and I felt like I lost touch with who I am. I don’t want to lie to myself or live in denial, but I’m exhausted. It feels like I’m being mentally forced to feel something that isn’t mine. I’m 14, and I understand that things might still be developing, but I can’t help feeling like I’ve always been drawn to men, and never naturally wanted women that way. Still, I keep doubting everything. Is this real attraction or OCD feeding false feelings and thoughts? Can OCD create emotional or mental sensations that feel like desire? I’m so scared that I’ll lose myself, or find out something I never wanted. I just want peace and to feel like myself again.
Be a part of the largest OCD Community
Share your thoughts so the Community can respond