- Date posted
- 6y
- Date posted
- 6y
She’s trying to get you to accept the thoughts. It is the uncertainty of this obsession that makes all of us obsess so much. It is the possibility that one could be gay, she cannot tell you what you are. She is just saying you will never truly know, and that is okay. the more you tell your brain “who knows” the less the thoughts have value. Ik that it can be tough and words can be triggers but try to look at this with a new perspective and also inform her that saying things like that can trigger you. And maybe she’ll word them differently. Don’t let it get to your head!!
- Date posted
- 6y
Maybe what she dood was cracked OCD head on and your OCD is so not used to it. In the beginning when u start cutting out cumpolsion the thoughts fly by so quickly . The more insexure / confused you are now the better. Eventually the brain will get so confused that it will lose track of what's important and what's not and life will just take over. I swear
- Date posted
- 6y
I'll tell her in the next session. Thank you both ♡ you help me to see it with another perspective.
- Date posted
- 6y
I feel the same way. Today my therapist told me a story of a man that wasn’t gay but was super attracted to muscles that he started having sex with men. It wasn’t for the men but the muscles. He was a happily married straight man. I wanted to be like why the hell are you telling me this!!!!
- Date posted
- 6y
I can relate to all of you. I have an appt tomorrow and already worried. Let’s stay strong.
- Date posted
- 6y
Thanks. Good luck!
- Date posted
- 6y
One of the cornerstones of OCD is the need to be 100% certain about things. When we can't be, we break down. But we can't be 100% certain about anything really, so the only way to cope long term is to learn to accept that there will always be uncertainty. That is what your therapist is trying to do here. We all go into therapy wanting to be fine - and we know that being certain about things would make us feel fine, so the natural response to sexual orientation OCD, which is rooted in your own head, is to try and get the professional analyser of how your head works to confirm that your thoughts don't mean anything and provide certainty that all is well. Which is giving in to OCD, not treating it. In reality, we have to learn to live with uncertainty - it's an exposure, just like touching something dirty is with contamination OCD. That means you have to make yourself feel uncertain (and really crappy) so that, over time, that experience gets less difficult with familiarity. This is horrible, but the research is there to show that, like other types of exposure, things will get better.
- Date posted
- 6y
Good luck everyone! We can do this!
- Date posted
- 6y
Thank you for the information ♡
Related posts
- Date posted
- 23w
I had a very bad session with a therapist today (NOT FROM NOCD). She basically told me I can’t be helped without medication, said I am too needy and if I keep being needy, people will continue to leave me, and my past trauma from relationships is my fault. I then had a second session with my old therapist who helped process and explain that OCD is lifelong and some people manage it but others have flare ups and I think I’m having a bad flare up (a month long basically) and that I may need medication which I’m terrified to go back on. Does it get better? Will I need meds? I’m scared. I don’t want to get worse and I don’t want these thoughts to scare me.
- Date posted
- 20w
I am very depressed right now. I really feel like maybe I’ve always been a lesbian and never knew. I never questioned my sexuality when I was young, never wanted to explore, I just was straight and didn’t think anything about it, that’s just what it was. I had my first soocd spiral in late high school but didn’t have a name for it, just that I was having intrusive thoughts and it was killing me that maybe I was gay. I can’t exactly remember how I got out of that but I continued to have crushes, talking stages, and dated. It went away and that was that I guess. Looking back now I definitely was still avoiding content and certain people, and still had intrusive thoughts but didn’t think I was gay. I guess they were less sticky. Something about me is that I’ve never had a boyfriend and I’m a virgin. I’m very shy and romanticize things like I love the relationships and scenarios I read about or that I see in movies or the thirst traps online haha. So I want that irl but am disappointed when that doesn’t happen. I have a very interactive daydream (started when I was 13 and still continued that fantasy world now too) with a boyfriend, friends, and a prettier version of me. I enjoyed making up scenarios about sex or romance in those daydreams and fantasies, but when it came to real life, I would get shy or scared when things were starting to get serious with men. I thought maybe this was an avoidant attachment style but now I’m not sure. I never considered female fantasies and I still don’t want to right now. I want to test and see which one I like better, but I’m afraid I’ll find that I’m a lesbian and I really don’t want that. Ive always imagined myself with a man but now I’m worried about comphet. I’m really depressed and I can’t tell because yes, I find some women attractive whether it’s their makeup, face, body, aesthetic, but I never thought that meant I was attracted to them in a sexual or romantic way until this spiral. Now I’m afraid of masc lesbians and pretty women because it triggers me. But I’m also afraid because I feel like I can look at attractive men, but I don’t feel the same way anymore. I can’t even daydream about them bc then my brain inserts a woman. I’m really scared that I’ve lost myself, because I truly feel like I have, but I don’t want to explore with women, I just want to like men, I’ve always liked that idea. But so many lesbians talk about liking celebrities, fantasy men, or just attractive men. Sorry for the rant but I’m struggling a lot right now. I feel like all my memories, even the ones that directly contradict being a lesbian, can be explained away by comphet, internal homophobia, denial, suppression, etc. When I do try and accept uncertainty, sometimes it feels ok, but then something will trigger me and I’m back at square one. I’m afraid if I take my meds I’ll discover something about myself that I don’t want to because I’ve always been depressed and avoidant of life because it never lives up to my expectations. My sexuality is on my mind 24/7! I can’t take it!
- Date posted
- 15w
Hey everyone I am new here. I had my third session here and I am quite confused — one of my therapist told me that what I was talking about was not about ocd and quickly shut me down. I am not going to lie when he said that I felt really bad and was too embarrassed to ask him if our conversations are exclusively about ocd. Are they? Thx guys 💕💕💕
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