Clementine
- Date posted
- 2y
Compulsions
I keep finding myself almost automatically checking or trying to disprove my intrusive thoughts before I even get chance to agree or ignore them. Does anyone have an advice on this?
Galaxy17Galaxy17
- Date posted
- 2y
I don’t know how great it is if your trying to long term help but sometimes I get stuck on a thought or worry so I give in and search stuff up so that way I can sleep in as much peace as possible. It’s usually about life threatening diseases and illnesses which isn’t good to always worry about but I don’t know how to not worry.
ocdallthewayocdalltheway
- Date posted
- 2y
I've had, or still have to an extent, the same problem. It seemed like I'm too fast for myself, even while talking to other people as soon as an intrusive thought pops up I would engage with it (and inevitably miss a part of the conversation). For me it seemed so automatic that the "neutralizing thought" became the intrusive one as they usually came in a package. What helped me? Well I started treating the whole "package" of thoughts as intrusive (if it becomes automatic as you say you could say it's intrusive, same thing as the original obsession) as in I would endure the thought and refocus on the conversation or the thing I was doing (the four R thing). You should watch out for one thing, are you trying to do it the "right way"? Or are you setting yourself the goal of having an almost perfect score of "I need to stop answering to any of my thoughts"? Intrusive thoughts are just thoughts, and any thought can become one so trying to always to de right thing is just impossible and counterproductive. If you didn't manage to do it "right" today (atleast to your expectations which might be high), no biggie, let's try to do it better next time. Also, one thing that always screwed me up. I'm prone to rumination and trying to think things through. When I got even a glimpse of thoughts which I knew was somehow connected to an obsession or part of this unwanted train of thoughts (be it the compulsion or obsession), I would push it down or try to force it away mentally. That would often happen in social situations due to the added pressure of having to stay present all the time (pressure which I put on myself and still sometimes do). In effect it was really hard for me to differentiate what was my obsession, intrusive thought or compulsion which didn't help when talking to therapist and them asking "so what are your intrusive thoughts?". So if your compulsions do include neutralizing or pushing down thoughts and then trying to figure out the "right" way to deal with them, you might be in a similar boat. So if the thoughts come in a package deal and you seem unable to uncouple them, treat them all as intrusive. That means enduring the thought/s (letting them be there but trying not to give them to much attention), accepting the negative feelings and refocusing on what you were doing. If you notice yourself engaging in them automatically, relax, you didn't fail anything. You can always try to refocus after catching yourself, there is no right way to do it. Treat it as a skill, due to the imperfect nature of thoughts and OCD, of course it's gonna take some time (and setback which are normal). Through time it will become much easier and you will start to do it automatically.
Clementine Clementine
- Date posted
- 2y
@ocdalltheway I can’t thank you enough for this!! Wow, I relate so much to your struggles and you phrased it all perfectly. I really appreciate the advice as I was really struggling to come up with a solution for avoiding all this checking I seem to automatically be doing. I’m going to try out your suggestions but also be kinder to myself if it doesn’t go to plan the first few tries. Thank you again!!
ocdallthewayocdalltheway
- Date posted
- 2y
@Clementine Happy to help! Keep at it and you got it, be kind to yourself. If you haven't already you can check out jon hershfields article series "Harm OCD" (just type in jon hershfield harm ocd, it's on the sheppard pratt website). He's got I think 4 articles in the series. To me, he has some of the best OCD insight and a great approach in dealing with it, it's a good read.
KillianKillian
- User type
- NOCD Alumni
- Date posted
- 2y
Yes! These mental compulsions are very common. My advice based on my own experience with them is to practice being mindful of your thoughts as a first step. That could be saying to yourself, “I’m having the thought that ___.” This helps us generate some awareness of the thought so that we don’t automatically go into checking or self-reassuring, etc. and give meaning to it. In other words it can help interrupt the OCD cycle that feeds us more and more doubt the more we engage. This article talks more about what mental compulsions are, how to identify them, and respond to them effectively: https://www.treatmyocd.com/blog/mental-compulsions-the-unseen-battle?utm_source=google_ads&utm_campaign=Search_Nonbrand_DSA_US&utm_content=All_Website_visitors&utm_term=&gclid=Cj0KCQiAg_KbBhDLARIsANx7wAwBycsGu5bbZTk_BLqaL7R5e789CjIWmGrY9tPFn7FbX_dqmVPeQK4aArenEALw_wcB
Clementine Clementine
- Date posted
- 2y
@Killian Thank you so much this is really helpful!
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OrMsB
- Date posted
- 25w
Compulsion
I did some gross compulsions, i do them because i think that if i do them i get rid of thoughts ( cause i don’t want them) that’s why I do compulsions but people do them to check am I a p? I’m terrified I can’t do it. What if im different I don’t think I heard about someone that did compulsions to get rid of thoughts that’s why but to check omg im terrified
Wed_Wheel
- Date posted
- 21w
My SO OCD
I have just recently realized that I had SO OCD. This began whenever I was watching porn and had an intrusive thought about the guy in the porn. It was more minor at first, it was a majority of what I was thinking about throughout the day but it didn’t feel as distressing at first. If I had downtime to think about it, it would affect me but if I was just going about my day I wouldn’t notice it. I began going through the compulsions of checking myself. This lasted for a while until another obsession occurred. Then it seemed as if my SO OCD took a step back. I would have flare ups but they would seem to pass. Recently, I had a very bad night of constant compulsions and looking at pictures and imagining things to check myself. After that night it was very distressing, it affected me to the point where people around me began to notice and ask me if I was okay. One of the big reasons I was so upset was my girlfriend, we have been together for over 3 years and I want to spend the rest of my life with her. I was thinking “Oh my god, if I am gay I can never be with her.” I would sit and cry about it thinking I would lose her and that might life would change because I was gay. I finally had enough and talked to her and my parents. We did some research and I was so shocked to find out that I had a form of OCD, it was like a weight being lifted off my shoulders just knowing that other people have been where I am and that I’m not gay. However, I may have naively expected the compulsions and obsessive thoughts to go away now that I knew I had an actual problem. But I found that the compulsions and thoughts were still there and I was going to put some effort into getting better. I have researched and now know what to do when experiencing intrusive thoughts, yet I still have been performing the compulsions which is just feeding into the OCD. I find myself having intrusive thoughts and then start performing compulsions to see if they are true. What really bothers me is when I have an intrusive thought that tells me that I do like something. But when I think about it I have no desire to pursue those thoughts. However when I feed into the compulsions they just seem to feed into each other. It is like my OCD ignores all the things that I know I like and goes straight to panic mode. I am also trying to do ERP and am going to start doing my best to get better. Does anyone have any tips for not performing the compulsions no matter how anxious you are feeling and no matter how real the intrusive thoughts seem to feel?
Anonymous
- Date posted
- 19w
Irrational Fears
Usually my compulsions are always motivated by fear. I feel like a child when I have compulsions. Like for example, my brain convinces me that someone is in my house and I need to open every cabinet and all the shower curtains, and do tons of other crazy things like march instead of walking so that if someone where to shoot at my legs they'd have less of a chance of hitting me. How do I stop it? I am just going about my day and I can see in my head, myself getting attacked or something and so my only option to calm myself down is to do a bunch of random actions that will keep me "safe". Does anyone else experience this? Or convince themselves that they are under Milo Murphys law? That anything bad that can happen to them will, so they need to never do anything that could result in anything bad, and avoid everything? And how do you convince yourself you're not in danger?
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