Sometimes when I’m enjoying myself, my brain says “if you hadn’t made this bad decision, you would be so much happier now”. And then when I think about it, I feel regret and am unable to enjoy myself. Is this an intrusive thought? Or is it just regret?
Honestly, you can treat this as just straight uncertainty and possibly find some relief. Say something like, “I’m feeling anxious because idk if this feeling is OCD or not, I can’t be 100% sure it is, I accept that uncertainty and am willing to live with it happily.” At a certain point for me sometimes, putting a label on something and saying it’s OCD can feed the cycle a bit. It’s just trying to get 100% confirmation it’s OCD and then some relief. Most of the time, more relief comes from accepting the uncertainty that a thought or feeling may or may not be OCD. I hope that made some sense.
Ugh I’m so sorry you feel that way. I am in the same boat… I always think that. “If I didn’t do that then I wouldn’t be feeling so bad about myself and I would be happy.” It’s not a good feeling at all. I’m not sure if it’s just a thought or regret or both.
I’m sharing this bc I need advice or even support from anyone who can relate. If you can’t relate and don’t think you’ll say anything helpful or kind pls don’t comment anything… I’ve been struggling with somethings that’s making me question myself. There has been moments while self pleasuring when I get intrusive thoughts, in those moments it feels like I’m enjoying or even self pleasuring myself bc of the thought. Right after I immediately have an anxiety attack and my HEART drops bc it feels terrible I feel like a disgusting monster :( ppl have told me I haven’t done a bad bc of how intense my guilt and panic are but I keep thinking that MAYBE I made a horrible decision in the moment and the guilt is just realising that it’s just wrong this doesn’t make sense to me because I’ve always told myself that I would never act on this in 1 million years and I’ve been known that these things are wrong so I’m just like constantly questioning myself these feelings and exact same situation has happened two times already I even promised myself that I wouldn’t act on anything beforehand and yeah, I still felt like I did act on my thought during my alone time I’m genuinely convinced that I’m a horrible and it’s even got into the point where I don’t wanna be here anymore and I don’t even think this is my OCD :( tbh
I struggle so bad with intrusive thoughts. They can be so bad that I'll cry because I KNOW that's not how I feel or want to do. (Too embarrassed to say what they're about) I'll constantly try to figure out why I have them, and constantly figure out what they mean, causing me to constantly circle around and around. I had to get on anxeity meds, which helped a little but the thoughts still happen. How do you help yourself with this? How do you know that you're just not some physcopath? 😅
Is a false memory a type of intrusive thought?
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