I don't know what to do

I feel like If I don't tell someone something I'll go crazy and I can't talk to to my family or friends I am to scared that they will hate me if that did happen I couldn't take it I'm so scared I just downloaded this app and I don't know much about ocd except what iv watched on YouTube and read online why am I don't even know why I'm trying this I just want to be ok the last few days have been the worst I do my best to act normal around my family but I can tell I'm not do that good of a job I can't stop crying when I'm alone i soon know what to do with my self I'm so fucked sorry for this rable Idk if this even helped I know I'm not supposed to ask for reassurance sorry

Username: HipHopAnonymous🦛 HipHopAnonym...

Date posted: 1y ago

It sucks indescribably badly not being able to choose what we think and what we feel on a day-to-day basis. If we let it, that fact can make us feel powerless. But only when we don’t realize that that’s not where our power is. Our power is in choosing how to respond and react to our thoughts and our feelings. We get to decide if a thought is significant or insignificant for us. We get to decide if a feeling is significant or insignificant for us. It’s a higher level of agency than choosing the thought/feeling itself. It gives us dominion over what the thought/feeling represents. We mostly weren’t taught that. When we are afraid it’s because we believe our thoughts are significant. We fear the potential of our thought being true more than we have faith in the experiential truth that we get to choose if the thought matters or not. We have to challenge that. The more we recognize our own significance as the “choice maker” the less we feel our thoughts to be significant, therefore the less we will notice them at all; rendering them essentially extinguished. Within the OCD community, how many themes that you don’t identify with have you had thoughts about before, but they just didn’t stick? My guess is plenty. Do you see my point? The problem is our fixation on the content and the subsequent fixation on the disturbance, not the content itself. So if we can alter those two things our experiencing of those things will seem to reduce. It’s a bit paradoxical to be able to choose the response but not the content, thus seeing the content react to the response. But such is the human experience.

Username: LizekLizek

Date posted: 1y ago

Thanks for taking the time to comment all this

Username: HipHopAnonymous🦛 HipHopAnonym...

Date posted: 1y ago

@Lizek I hope it helps you 🙏🏽

Username: multiprez101multiprez101

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 1y ago

Maybe try getting an inital assessment with a professional through the OCD app and discuss how to proceed.

Username: tintin

Date posted: 1y ago

I do the same… I just try to act normal everyday around my family. They don’t know how much I’m suffering.

Username: Maybe,MaybeNotMaybe,MaybeNot

Date posted: 1y ago

I’ve struggled with confession as a compulsion too. It’s incredibly painful to sit through the urge, but I have to say, I don’t know that confessing anything ever got me anywhere. It really never changed anything or accomplished anything, and if I thought it was going to give me relief from my guilt and anxiety something else always popped right up in its place. I do know that most of us with OCD have felt like the most horrible person on the face of the planet though. You’re not alone. Have you found a therapist specialized in OCD? Are you on meds?

Username: LizekLizek

Date posted: 1y ago

I'm not on med or seeing a therapist I want to see one but I'm scared as dumb as that is

Username: Maybe,MaybeNotMaybe,MaybeNot

Date posted: 1y ago

@Lizek I get it. I think most of us have felt that way in the beginning. But there’s nothing to worry about, they will understand. And if they don’t they aren’t the right therapist. I would look into getting a psychiatrist too

Username: LizekLizek

Date posted: 1y ago

@Maybe,MaybeNot I will thanks for the advice and taking time to comment

Username: nka

Date posted: 3y ago

so i need to vent here because i'm sick to the point of wanting to throw up. ill be talking about how my ocd started. I think my ocd is a little different as I've never seen anyone with that kind of intrusive thinking, so my ocd makes me think it's real. my intrusive thoughts are like "I wish something bad could happen to this person" and it's something really, really bad that I abhor. I just don't want it to happen to the person, it's totally automatic and makes me want to cry all the time. and it all started with a book I was reading and I didn't know it had things like pedophilia and rape. and as I'm underage these things can easily get stuck in my head, there was an explicit scene and it felt like my body was reacting to it, even I DON'T WANT TO and that made me feel really bad. I never had thoughts like that before reading that fucking book I regret so much. and then for me it's very hard to recover, because my ocd says something like i want it to happen, but definitely not. I can't access the erp because I'm not fluent in english and much less have money already converted to real is absurd. I'm afraid to go to therapy because there aren't many therapists who specialize in ocd here and I'm afraid it could get worse. I already talked about ocd with my mother but she didn't understand much, in fact I was fine and she said something that made my situation worse. so that's it, sorry for the big text, but I needed it.

Username: Nathanannon

Date posted: 1y ago

This is hell.

Ok sorry this is kinda a quick post just desperate for help. Any advice anyone who can provide some help or advice. I’m feeling pretty overwhelmed and suicidal at the moment so writing this isn’t easy, I’m struggling to find the words to describe how I’m feeling right now, so I’m just gonna lay it out as it is. Although I haven’t been formally diagnosed with ocd I have allot and I mean allot of the symptoms. My life and mental state is horrible and it’s hard. Ur I try and get get by with the good things in my life. Sorry I’m not here for a pity party or sob story. I know you all are better and have enough to worry about. Basically I had a friend who was 14 and I met when I was 17. We talked for a few months and while we where pretty chill out conversations sometimes involved more suggestive things. Talking as teenagers do. However as I was getting close to being 18 I knew I had to stop this out of morals and my own judgement. So I did. Or so I thought, I’m my opinion what i said here was wrong and my ocd if I even have it is telling me I’m a creep and some monster who deserves to die and suffer. Basically now I was at the time 18 we where playing Truth and dare. Classic party game for boring nights. And I asked what there best pickup line was. I responded to there’s with “aha that was funny” and moved on. I just feel the dare I said was sexual or inappropriate to ask them. And I feel horrible so horrible I can’t even begin to explain it. I feel hopeless and I’m slowly losing grip of myself. I don’t wanna seem like I’m begging or asking for reassurance but any semblance of hope would help. Or advice honestly I would be great full for both. Thank you for reading whoever you are and i hope ur day is going better than mine.

Username: ElChavodel275

Date posted: 35w ago

Rant

I can’t say that I have OCD but I’ve seen the various themes and I feel as I have it and well my life has been very crazy for the last 5 days. Right now I’m struggling with harm and somewhat religious ocd I’d say and becuase of the thoughts I have gotten panic/anxiety attacks and can’t keep myself from shaking and feeling very hot or cold becuase of these thoughts. I have also dealt with health, sexual orientation, etc in the past. But harm and religious ocd has really shaken me like crazy I’ve had thoughts of harming my mother and yk I don’t wanna say the word but yk it and I get really scared that maybe that my mind really wants to do it but I today I cried for the first time in such a while thinking about my mom and it kinda gave me relief because I seriously felt I have lost my emotions but I feel way more relaxed and joining this app today and seeing people’s experiences has given me hope

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