I don’t think I will for a while because I just started dating someone but how do you tell your partner about your ocd? And how did they react?
I told my fiancé pretty early on. I think i mentioned it after a few months, but maybe went into more detail when things got a little more serious between us. I explained how it first started, and what it targets, what my compulsions are, etc. He’s honestly been amazing about it, my biggest compulsion is confessing to him because I have ROCD, and he’s never once made me feel badly about it. Just encourages me and offers support when i need it.
I was honest pretty early on. I just let him know that I struggle with it and he was super understanding
@Bbqueen How did you explain it to him? If you don’t mind me asking? Because I’d want to explain erp but not make him scared or anything
@Anonymous I just explained that it is different for everyone but explained how it works for me. So I told him that it can make religion hard for me and messes with my body image. I just explained more about OCD in general too to help him understand it isn’t just cleanliness. It really helped bc know how knows how to help and can be more understanding when I’m having a hard time.
@Bbqueen Good luck!! My relationship is pretty new too. But the right one will be supportive
I told my lady every theme of ocd I get the questioning if I love her the doubting she loves me the sexual orientation theme and she is still by my side and we’re 4 months in now .. she could of left .. but she didn’t .. she’s been amazing so far ! And try’s to understand me big time
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@Smile97 For me I was the same .. I didn’t wanna do anything but play around I was too afraid of getting heart broken cause I’ve been through a lot.. so I went two years just focusing on myself and my daughters and I met a woman who was down for just freinds with benifits and that’s all I wanted .. but we ended up liking eachother a lot .. so it became a relationship .. I just liked her to much to let her go.. but then I remembered why I was afraid of relationships .. I’ve been in and out of my head ever since.. but I like her to much to wanna leave .. and she’s very understanding .. but still.. I don’t like disappointing .. every time we try to get intimate I get in my head thinking I won’t do good or work cause I’m in my head .. and I get scared and it pisses me off lol.
I told my fiancé about it and she has been so kind to me. We are married and have a daughter. My wife got me started on meds and comes with me to all my visits to the psychiatrist. I’m glad I have her by my side
@Ocd surfer What ocd themes do you struggle with ? If you don’t mind me asking ! And that’s also a beautiful thing ! That’s what I want.. I seem to have found it but my relationship ocd I got I’m always doubting it doubting I love her or when I doubt she loves me I get scared but as soon as she shows me she loves me and is here for me I go right back to thinking do I really love her ? Or do I wanna be single and play around even though I didn’t give a shit about playing around with anyone before I got with her lol. Ocd is a bitch I swear .
I was open today to my partner about my harm ocd and just explained how I’d never want to do anything or do anything and what the ocd cycle is and how the intrusive thoughts give me so much anxiety and how my amazing therapist helped me overcome it and he was very understanding and supportive which I am so happy about I had a feeling he would react this way but I feel a weird weight Being left of my shoulders
@Anonymous Thats really awesome 👏 I’m so proud of you and happy for you
@Anonymous I’m glad you feel relieved 😌
Thank you I appreciate it!
Thank you!
I am in the same boat, dating someone casually but it’s been a few months and things are progressing. Not really sure when to tell. Kind of scared
@dorseela000 I would say something right away .. that’s just me though. With every relationship I’ve had I made sure to lay it on the table within the first month or so .. it’s better than not telling and your hiding your disorder . If the person can’t handle that then they weren’t the right partner or support system .. that’s just me though .
I’ve had so many moments of clarity with my OCD that I love my boyfriend and I’m beyond willing to go through this to be better and be with him. in the back of mind I’ve in a way known I was at least somewhat sexually attracted to women (I’m a woman) since the start of the ocd it was always like “okay. Fine, but I don’t want to date a girl” I only just realized this after the ocd started, I never really argued with this. my ocd has always revolved around if I’m romantically interested in women and not men. I’ve done so many compulsions through this year and a half and 9 times out of 10 have come to the conclusion that I don’t want to be with a woman romantically. I always end up feeling like I know I love my boyfriend. But the doubts don’t stop about whether I want to spend my life with a woman instead, my heart literally breaks to think of not being with my bf and imagining him with someone else. I don’t want to be with a woman I know deep down somewhere underneath the anxiety that that’s not what I want. It doesn’t feel natural for me, unfulfilling. I want to tell my boyfriend about the possible sexual attraction to women (ik it’s still ocd related) but I’m scared that once I tell him, I’ll realize that I actually do want to be with women and not with him. Ugh I’ve spent hours today ruminating about this after being solid in my commitment with him for a little while, I’m stuck in this loop and idk how to get out right now
I’ve been really struggling the last week and I need some help. I’ve been seeing a guy for about 2 months who checks a lot of my relationship boxes. He’s so kind and we have a lot of fun together. The first few weeks I was totally smitten but had moments of fear about being committed. We talked about it and decided to take things slowly, and then I would have days of feeling like every thing was perfect with some fearful feelings in between. Two weeks ago now my SO-OCD and ROCD started to come back a little as well as my more anxious-avoidant behaviors. I started to get more scared of the future and it was more intense. At the end of last week, he asked me to be his girlfriend and I said yes. He is exactly the type of person I see myself marrying and has great values and is so secure about me. Until last week, he generally made me feel so safe and secure. Ever since saying yes, I feel so scared and anxious and my SO-OCD and ROCD is on max. I also find myself getting more annoyed and irritated about things that were minor annoyances or non-issues before. I’m having intense physical responses to both OCD themes, and the nagging thought and feeling that I need to end things with him because we aren’t right for each other. It makes me feel so sad and guilty. Sex is becoming harder because of the thoughts too, whereas at first it was perfect. I don’t know who I can talk to about this without them telling me to just break up with him. Everything is so new so I think they’d chalk it up to my intuition. But I do want to be in love and have less fear around relationships, so I don’t want to give into the fear. I think it could help me to set boundaries and have space for myself more often. I think I need some advice or insight. I know I shouldn’t ask for reassurance, but having some around how other people have felt at the beginning of a relationship would help. Why is it that the label is freaking me out so much? How do you guys set boundaries to prioritize yourself when you feel this way?
I posted the other day about my subtype of staring ocd but I’m supposed to start a new job next week. I work in wellness/beauty and will be seeing people half naked. It doesn’t trigger me as I’m treating clients but only when I’m not supposed to be looking (like normal interactions). It happens when people wear very revealing clothes or are super curvy and my eye goes to that area. It also happens when people are adjusting themselves and my eye goes to their hands. It’s very embarrassing and I quit my last job because of this and I don’t want to make more people feel uncomfortable. It left me very depressed and hopeless. It’s such a frustrating type of ocd to deal with because it impacts me financially and socially. I just want to feel okay. Anyways, I’m writing this because I’m wondering if I should share with my new employer about this issue so I don’t weird anyone out or keep it to myself? I’m not sure what to do. I need money as I have a mortgage and two kids and would like to help my husband. I’m currently on Zoloft 50mg, have done therapy but this is such a hard type to treat as it’s not the cleaning type. I know I’m not supposed to ask for advice about what to do but I need to know so I can make a decision and not get cold feet.
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