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My heart goes out to you and others who are going through stressful and traumatizing events and grief. These things are among the hardest experiences humans go through in our lives. Having OCD makes it even more complicated. You know, sometimes OCD "wins the lottery" and things we obsess about actually happen. It's hard and scary. Working with your therapist to come up with specific exposures to address some of the themes coming up will help. Doing ERP every single day will also help. My heart is with you 🩷 I know things are hard right now, but I also know you will get through it and get better with some support and being willing to do the hard things. Practice self compassion (Kimberley Quinlan is a great resource) and let yourself grieve.

i understand. keep fighting and doing ERP. “maybe i am in a simulation and they’re torturing me for their entertainment”

If you ever need to talk or vent i will listen. The world is not against you and I promise it will get better🫶

Cannot tell you how much I relate to this. Couple months back someone in my family died of cancer and I was unfortunately exposed to the really graphic reality of it and then my childhood dog who I considered my best friend in the whole world died. Other people in my family have been having bad health issues and of course my ocd has spiked through the roof because e of all this. I’ve been trying to regain my hope in life but it really is a struggle. I am with you. Sending love ❤️