Deleted post.

It could be that your attracted to masculine women b/c you see them as another form of a man 👀 this sounds weird but I heard a lot of women that are “attracted” to studs are attracted to the masculinity but not the woman as its own entity. Idk if that makes sense. And I also resonate with you. I rarely have/had celebrity crushes and most of the men I liked it was a mix of personality and looks. Attraction is a unique experience and doesn’t have to look like the “norm.” Not everyone is driven by sex. I also tend to be attracted to people I know in real life. I really can’t process how people feel strongly for people they never met it’s kind of insane to me

I know what you are going through, it’s the same thing that is bothering me for like months. I really wanna help you, but I don’t know how since I’m the one struggling with past memories. All I can say, you’re not alone. Stay strong and don’t let ocd take control of your day ❤️

I am similar to you, I always got feelings for someone after I knew them, kind of Demi sexual in a way! I never look at abs and that it’s sexy.

What makes you think you like women?

I know you posted this a while ago, but I’m in an OCD flare up and I also am currently triggered by my memories. My memories tend to trigger me a lot and are centered around who I had crushes on in the media and who I paid more attention to (men vs women). I feel like I remember paying more attention to how women looked and women’s bodies, or I have more memories of women being “sexy”, but I think that’s my OCD trying to look for proof. I also know I was a super self conscious kid and wanted to look different than I did. I’m curious how you’re doing now? Hopefully better than you were when you wrote this