Struggling with OCD focused on health fears and anxiety about death.

Illness/death ocd

I’m new to this app but wanted to just get it out there. I have ocd that comes out as obsessing that I have some unknown disease or cancer that is killing me. It gets really bad before I travel and causes me heart palpitations. Before I travel I’m convinced I’m going to die on the trip so then I start having heart palpitations which leads me to think I’ve got some rare heart cancer. It’s a weird circle. I’ve had an echo so I know there’s nothing wrong with my heart but my brain doesn’t care. This worry extends to my kids where I constantly think something bad is going to happen to them. It got 10x worse after my stepdad died in a motorcycle accident a few years ago then my mom and brother had cancer. It seemed to have solidified that death is going to happen so no self talk is working. It’s exhausting.

Username: PPittsPPitts

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 1y ago

Same! Been like this for years. Worries about death or my health. Recently diagnosed with OCD which explains a lot. Mine also worse when a trip is coming. I think being away from home drives that. I have some health issues but parlay them into worst case. At 55 my hip is shot and I have arthritis in several spots, and reflux. Can’t take much for the pain as it makes mu tinitus worse. So I constantly worry about how I will get by as things progress. And of course - any small symptom I turn into something that is fatal. My NOCD therapist helped me a lot. I was great for a few months - but it’s easy to feel good when things are good. Working on managing my ocd and staying positive when things are tough. Eat well, exercise and get plenty of rest. Appreciate the mention of resources above. It always helps to know you are not alone. Hang in there.

Username: Jacalyn W.Jacalyn W.

Date posted: 1y ago

@PPitts Thanks so much! Yes, it drives me crazy. I’ve had this since I was a child but it wasn’t until about 5 years ago when a therapist diagnosed me with OCD. My death anxiety kicks into overdrive to the point of feeling like I’m going to hyperventilate if I don’t accidentally forget something when I leave for a trip or I’m on my way home. It HAS to be an accident or “it doesn’t work.” Basically if I don’t accidentally forget something then it means I don’t have to come back for it therefore I’m going to die for sure. In my mind I have to be alive to come back to get the thing I forgot so I can’t die but if I don’t forget something then I’m for sure going to die. It literally makes zero logical sense but my brain 100% believes it.

Username: VGHVGH

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 1y ago

Hi, I’m sorry you’re going through this. I spent years struggling with health anxiety. You have found the right place to be. Have you reached out for therapy with NOCD. It was where I learned the tools to overcome my OCD. Explore NOCD’s YouTube channel there are some great videos. “Needing To Know For Sure” by Winston and Seif is a great book. Mark Freeman and Kimberly Quinlan also have some great content on health anxiety. Glad you’re here, reach out anytime.

Username: Jacalyn W.Jacalyn W.

Date posted: 1y ago

@VGH I’ll check out the YouTube channel. I haven’t reached out to a therapist yet from NOCD

Username: OCDisAwful1204OCDisAwful1204

Date posted: 19w ago

I’m going through this right now. I’m leaving tonight for the beach (7 hours away) and I’ve been having anxiety/heart palpitations ALL DAY. Like FREQUENTLY. it’s really freaking me out.

Username: wannabeokay

Date posted: 4y ago

I believe I have undiagnosed OCD but was wondering if anyone else goes through this struggle. I constantly think of ways my loved ones might die. Whether that be from an event happening or a situation I am in with them and I am afraid to leave them in fear that they will die and I will be left alone. For example, I could be indoors with my family and they all go outside without me. I immediately imagine a tornado coming up, knocking over a tree and killing my family with me left to survive. Or I think of certain scenarios where a disease (especially with Covid-19 going around) could infect a loved one and my mind creates vivid images of how they could die of the disease. Does anyone else experience this? How do you cope?

Username: paylo28

Date posted: 51w ago

Health Anxiety/OCD

7 years ago I was a raging drug addict. I took any and all kinds of drugs without second thought of consequences. When I had my first child it’s like a switch flipped in my brain. Within her first 6 months of life I had over 12 visits to the ER. I was (still am) constantly afraid of developing a life threatening disease / illness or having a sudden health event (stroke / heart attack / heart failure / brain tumor / cancer ) develop. I’ve seen over 10 Specialist from autoimmune, heart, eyes, neurology , stomach , skin, etc. I’ve got a seemingly well bill of health but I become so hyper aware of every small change within my body. It’s. Constant state of fear and anxiety. Headache = likely tumor / aneurysm , small pain in chest or arm = heart problems , mild cold = covid or some rare disease , etc. Lately, my heart has been my fixation. I was having tachycardia going to the ER 2x a week. EKGs normal, 24hr monitor normal, X-RAY normal. Shortly after I notice my resting heart rate went down as low as 50bpm. I looked through my history over the months and that seems pretty normal for me I just hadn’t noticed before. Now I’ve been worried about my heart for weeks even tho my dr says I’m okay. It’s exhausting to be afraid of sickness and death 24/7. When I get focused on these thoughts it pulls me away from my kids and husband and daily tasks. I either full blown panic or shut down in fear. Anyone else relate? What helps you? I don’t want to rely on medications as I have so many adverse reactions to the 10+ I’ve tried! - oh year here’s another one - I’m afraid of allergic reactions as well I CONSTANTLY fear I will have an allergic reaction to medications / foods or over dose on things like Tylenol and Ibuprofen or mix meds and have reactions.

Username: Alittlebital...

Date posted: 38w ago

Health concerns

Hey everyone, I’m not sure if this is super OCD related, but I figured I’d post just to maybe feel less alone. I’m always worried in the back of my mind that I might have cancer, and it’s not for nothing, I have had two types of cancer before I was 10 years old. The fear doesn’t take over my life, but it’s definitely there. I recently got sent to check a large lump that appeared on my thyroid, and all diagnostics coming back so far are ruling out the easy non-cancer options. I’m worried, it’s not an unfounded worry, but it’s starting to interfere with my life in a way that feels like OCD. I’m scared, and if I’m completely honest, I’m extremely sad. The last thing I want to do is get life changing bad news in the middle of an OCD spiral. Anyway, thank you for reading, I think I just needed to get that off my chest ❤️‍🩹

Young adults with OCD

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Struggling with OCD focused on health fears and anxiety about death.

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