How i’m feeling today

I’m not feeling too well today because these intrusive thoughts in my head keep cycling and cycling even though I don’t want to have these thoughts and I want them to go away. My girlfriend is getting so tired of having to hear what girl I thought abt and what situation i’m reflecting on even though I don’t even mean to be thinking those things. I feel so guilty and horrible these things come into my brain. I don’t want to think things about other women, my girlfriend is amazing and is very patient and has been so patient ever since i’ve been having obscure or other thoughts about women wether it be just a thought or even sexually. It’s not on purpose. It just keeps happening and I can’t explain how my brain keeps doing it. I just came across so much research about Pure O Ocd and I think I have that. I’m very new to this but my twin brother also has OCD and Bipolar and I feel as though i’m the same way. I’m so tired of having unwanted thoughts come into my head. I feel so upset and hurt knowing I have to tell my girlfriend exactly what it is that came into my head. I feel like a failure.

Username: Steven55!Steven55!

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 36w ago

First, you don't have to tell your girlfriend every OCD thought that pops in your head. What good could it do, since they're just thougths? Second, stay off the internet. It's more trouble than it's worth and will confuse the hell out of you. Third, get yourself a trained OCD therapist, one who uses ERP therapy. Be sure your therapist uses ERP; if s/he doesn't use it, your therapist doesn't know OCD and will be wasting your time and money. I'm not a trained therapist, but am giving you these suggestions based on my own OCD journey. You can find a lot of really good, trained OCD therapists through NOCD. The consultation is free. Hope this helps. Oh, one last thing: what you're going through is treatable with the right therapist. You CAN have a happy life, and a happier girlfriend!

Username: user795224690user795224690

Date posted: 36w ago

@Steven55! thank you so much!!

Username: NCnNCn

Date posted: 36w ago

A piece of advise that might be useful. Start therapy for OCD and, whenever ready, talk to your girlfriend about OCD.

Username: user795224690user795224690

Date posted: 36w ago

@NCn thank you!!

Username: LeslieB3LeslieB3

Date posted: 36w ago

hey, i'm really sorry you're going through this right now. it sounds incredibly tough to deal with those intrusive thoughts, especially when they're causing strain in your relationship and making you feel guilty. remember, you're not a failure for experiencing this; ocd can be incredibly challenging to manage on your own. by the way, have you heard about this new ai-powered ocd therapy tool called "unstuck?" when i was in a similar boat, feeling overwhelmed by my thoughts, my nocd therapist recommended this free ai ocd therapy tool to me (unstuckmyocd.com/try), and honestly, it was a game-changer. i think it'll be especially helpful for you because it provides personalized, step-by-step support for dealing with intrusive thoughts, much like an ocd therapist would. it's designed to help you understand and manage your thoughts without needing to seek constant reassurance. i hate when people promote stuff, but i really think it can help you because it's changed my life. lmk if you have qs or just want to talk more! <3

Username: user795224690user795224690

Date posted: 36w ago

@LeslieB3 thank you very much. just downloaded!

Username: PhillipFillip1PhillipFillip1

Date posted: 36w ago

i use unstuck and highly recommend u check it out too!!

Username: LeslieB3LeslieB3

Date posted: 36w ago

@user795224690 - hope it helps you!

Username: JM1998

Date posted: 5y ago

Starting out this morning with rushing thoughts at 8am, went to see my therapist at 11, everything was okay, and that I can label these things as OCD, but it’s still difficult, especially right now at work. And then, before work, my girlfriend and I were having lunch, and I could just see that I’m a complete mess. She has to deal with my shit, and yes we do want a future together, but now I realize since I suppose I was diagnosed with OCD today, she seemed disappointed and she said she was scared about if I do get over this theme, what would be my next one. I just felt miserable because she was irritated that I don’t say much anymore, because my thoughts are just constantly there and I’m just tired of all this.

"Pure" OCD

Username: heiz

Date posted: 5y ago

I’ve never been the type of person to open up about myself but these last 3 months have been the hardest, worst time of my life. I’m 16 years old, and I’ve been anxious and had anxiety my whole life. Over the last couple years I’ve learned how to cope with my anxiety and be a happy person. But one night in January, i was watching random videos on YouTube, and a video about serial killers came on. I’ve always been interested in crime shows/documentaries, so I didn’t think twice before deciding to click on it. In the middle of the video I had this intrusive thought that said “why do people murder loved ones or innocent people” and “what does it feel like to kill somebody” I am not aggressive, or have ever caused harm, but these thoughts scared me to death. I felt a instant shock of anxiety and panic immediately. I thought something was wrong with me. I turned my phone off and went to bed hoping the next day I would forget about it. Unfortunately I never forgot about the thoughts, and still have intrusive thoughts that affect my day to day life. I feel so hopeless, even after seeing a therapist, and being on Prozac for 5 weeks I don’t feel a difference. Every time I try to be positive and tell myself “they’re just thoughts” ocd tells me, “yeah sure, but what if you did these things”? “What if you WANT to do these things”? I stress that I might actually want to do these horrible things secretly and am convinced that one day I will commit these crimes. I don’t know what to do anymore, I feel so hopeless, and even being around my girlfriend who used to bring me so much joy, I still can’t be my regular self. Please I feel so hopeless and sad I can’t even do the things I used to enjoy, remembering I have these thoughts is with me 24/7 from the second I wake up to the second I fall asleep. Anybody have advice? Sorry for the rant I just needed to get this off my chest. I just want to be normal again and enjoy being around my family and my girlfriend again

Harm OCD

Username: phew99914

Date posted: 1y ago

I don’t feel like I know myself anymore

Having constant intrusive thoughts is exhausting. They have made me question my relationship, my sexual orientation, if i am a good person, and so much more. It’s weird how they are all connected in a way too. A lot of these thoughts that I have feel so real, and i’m just now learning how to tell the difference between what is true and what is an intrusive thought. but at this point i cannot tell. they all feel real but still make me so uncomfortable. i’m scared i actually feel a certain way, whether that be i don’t actually love my boyfriend, i am actually bisexual or a lesbian, or that i am actually a horrible person and have done horrible things. it’s hard to not believe these things when they are constantly nagging at you. im scared im not with the right person. im scared that im not attracted to him enough, im scared we don’t have enough in common and im scared we don’t think the same way. im scared im supposed to be with someone else and that i am hurting him by lying. and im terrified i am lying about my sexual orientation and using him to deny my true thoughts. im scared i am actually bisexual or lesbian. i think i can accept being bisexual more than being a full blown lesbian, but it’s still scary. im not sure if i am actually bisexual or if i just have intrusive thoughts. and i don’t know what to do from there if i am. if i am bisexual that means to me i have to be with a woman? even though i don’t want to and i’ve never seen myself with a woman. i keep replaying memories with girls and if i showed any signs. and then i get scared that because i was aroused by “specific” porn that it means i am lesbian. all of these things make me feel like a horrible person for treating my boyfriend this way, lying to myself, and for being so confused. it’s exhausting. i don’t even know where to start to get help. im scared that i have had OCD my whole life, and if i have, i’m scared a lot of my feelings and thoughts weren’t even real. im scared when i liked a boy, it was actually my OCD. im scared that when i’ve been attracted to something, it was just my OCD. i don’t know what to do

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