- Date posted
- 5y
- Date posted
- 5y
Thank you both for responding and trying to find solutions. I truly appreciate your compassion. My life has been less stressful lately, which is why I thought I could handle signing up for this series. I do feel loved in general, but OCD often convinces me that others love the person I’m “pretending” to be and not the “real” me. I think a little preparation and planning for a really thorough decompression and relaxation after is important. Today, mid-day, my panic finally broke. While I’m still in an anxious state, I’ve found the ability to function again. For now, I’m going to keep trying. I hate to back out of a challenge like this; that’s just showing my OCD that it won. I am allowing for the possibility that I may pull out of the classes later on if it doesn’t improve, but I’m going to try just a little longer, and see if I can overcome. Being brave in these situations is so hard. The mind and body make every second feel like life and death. The fight/flight response turns on and for me, it’s very hard to turn off. Again, thank you both for responding and for anyone who read. After I wrote this post originally, I felt a little better just knowing I’d shared and put my fears out into the world a little. I tend to internalize and keep everything to myself. It’s always a big step for me to ask for help, acceptance, or compassion. I’m glad I did.
- Date posted
- 5y
That sounds horrible, seems like you’ve had a series of unpredicted unfortunate negative events. Perhaps you’re too stressed out to deal with such a level of exposure at the moment. How much stress do you have in life in general right now? Do you feel supported and loved in general? Maybe you should try to do what you can to sleep and rest, and slowly get back at it again, trying to stay healthy and keeping a good foundation for treating yourself. Remember that OCD is your enemy and that this is just one skirmish in a long war. In the end OCD NEVER wins the war.
- Date posted
- 5y
Hey there, I wish you to get better soon! I agree with @ejgh, sounds like too strong an exposure. If you want to stick to these classes, maybe try preparing yourself to them? Not pushing away thoughts about how you felt during the class when it’s over, but trying to sit with discomfort when you’re safely home?
- Date posted
- 5y
And I’ve just remembered how I used to be triggered at mo yoga classes too. It was the worst. So I know it’s hard.
Related posts
- Date posted
- 24w
I feel awful that I keep coming on here whenever I’m down bad but oh my gosh OCD is the most painful shit that I have EVER experienced in my life and I have a physical chronic illness…. I hate to say it but I hate living right now it’s too painful… im crying as I type to the point where my stomach is hurting, I have pretty severe ocd I do have generalized anxiety and idk if that is connected with ocd but because of that I have most of the subtypes REAL EVENT OCD,POCD,ZOCD,ROCD,SOCD HARM OCD, you name it and I got it!!! a lot of also why I have have those theme is trauma growing up and involving those things^ as of right now i’m 25 and a women with the most loving boyfriend in the entire world before my ocd hit me I NEVER questioned my love and care and attraction with the love of my life I always knew I was going to marry and be with this person the rest of my life! Now with ocd it confuses me soooo much and now I think I’m gay and didn’t realize or indenial and listen I get it “don’t look for reassurance!” “It’s not the thing ocd is attacking that is the problem ocd is the actual problem!” Here’s the thing with that if I’m in a relationship and I’m gay that would mean I would have to leave that said relationship and to say that “oh yeah that stuff happens and you’ll move on” is absolutely devastating to me this is THE LOVE OF MY LIFE and your telling me that iv been lying to myself this whole time or that I didn’t realize?!?!? And that sexuality can change (even though some say it can’t google says otherwise and some people have said it can’t idek anymore) and all this other BULLSHIT I can’t take it WHY?!?! why does this have to happen why can’t I just be with my love the rest of my life?!? and yes before anyone says anything I have been attracted to girls more so when I was younger watching lesbian porn liking the body’s and fantazing them sexually it stopped when I got older but I still don’t get disgusted with women who are pretty it just makes me uncomfortable because I’m with the love of my life and before I remember talking to my partner and discussing certain childhood things I experienced and we discussed that we both could be a little bi and for certain I’m (demi sexual so I don’t even really care about looks) and I truly didn’t care!! NOW I do care even with being bi because again I don’t like thinking about anyone else but my partner but I do also know my parents are homophobic and I do think about if I am gay they wouldn’t be okay with that and I also dont want to deal with that so now I sound like in indenial right?!???? I didn’t even care about labels before my ocd it just didn’t matter but now it’s effected my sex life and it’s hard for me to enjoy sex with being so confused I’m so confused I googled everything can you still have sexual fantasies with same gender but still be straight? Can you fantasize about same gender or imagine marrying them all of it !!! And non of that disgusts me it just makes me uncomfortable AGIAN only bc I just love the partner I’m with right now!!! I’m so fucking confused do I have to leave my partner and accept that I’m gay is that going to happen in the future if I get better with ocd and find out it’s been true all along?!???
- Date posted
- 16w
I want to rip out my uterus. Only my hormones can make my OCD and ability to manage it go back to square one. I am spiraling *so* hard. I cannot breathe. My PMDD is going crazy. I’m having a panic attack again. I feel so scared. The POCD is going absolutely insane right now. It feels undeniably real, and my mind keeps drifting to those awful thoughts and what feels like exploring them?? but I can’t for the life of me stop some of these compulsions right now. I was trying to watch something to get my mind off of this but ended up getting triggered twice, so my anxiety is a 10 and I can’t seem to calm down. This panic attack is tuned all the way up.
- Young adults with OCD
- Religion & Spirituality OCD
- "Pure" OCD
- POCD
- Older adults with OCD
- Students with OCD
- Harm OCD
- Mid-life adults with OCD
- Date posted
- 6w
i feel the need to say sorry because i’m posting yet again. i’m having a REALLY DIFFICULT episode of ocd that i haven’t had for a few months now. i experience contamination ocd everyday and have constant anxiety attacks, however because that’s so normal to me and doesn’t affect anyone but myself, it doesn’t affect me in the same way harm ocd does. i haven’t had to deal with really bad harm ocd thoughts for a good bit now so i’m struggling so bad right now. if anyone has seen my previous posts (which i’m sure you have), this came about over a small change that happened a couple weeks ago. it’s now blossoming into a full episode. it’s making me feel paralyzed and not want to do anything, but i know in the past i had to force myself to distract myself by actually doing things. i’m supposed to hang out with my friend tomorrow, but i’m so close to cancelling because i feel like i can’t do it. my physical symptoms are also worse than what i feel like i’m used to and it’s terrifying me into thinking i’m gonna get sick. i just don’t know how to get through it. it feels like impending doom and constant panic. i just want to feel like myself again and happy
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