Relationship difficulties

Something is always bugging me about my bf, it’s getting so annoying. I just want to be happy, but something always starts to bug me, and it makes me worry that I should leave or that I should try to change how I feel about the things that bug me. For example, right now it’s the fact that my bf is crazy hyper sometimes when he’s with our friends, and it comes out in the way he acts and the way he talks, and I could be over analyzing it which makes it feel worse than it is, but it can be cringy and even annoying sometimes. Part of these feelings could be coming from the fact that I was probably that way when I was younger, and it probably got bullied out of me, and now I’m always worried of being judged or disliked. But in general I would say that my bf acts “differently” than most sometimes, especially when he’s hyper. I want this relationship to work so so so badly, I want to have a future with him, I’m just trying desperately to work through all the little things that bug me, because I know they mean so little in the grand scheme of things, and yet I can’t stop being bugged by them. I feel a sense of urgency to do something, to change the way I feel and think about it. It’s so frustrating. I just want to live him. He is so amazing, I just want to plan a future with him. But I worry because in those moments when he’s being crazy and hyper and cringy, I start to feel like maybe I don’t actually like him enough, because if I did I feel like I shouldn’t be put off by his weirdness.

Lollipop 🍭

Date posted: 1y

One thing that helps me is thinking that even with a different partner I'd find things I don't like about them. Also ask yourself in which ways these things make you uncomfortable

Anonymous_co...

Date posted: 1y

@Lollipop 🍭 Right, like I know that no one is ever perfect, and I really want to grow and deepen my relationship with him. I care so much about him and I feel safe with him. I guess it’s hard for me to pinpoint what exactly I feel when he acts cringy or hyper or embarrassing, I think I just start to feel judgy towards him and annoyed and maybe even embarrassed sometimes. It can just be a turn off. But I don’t want to be judgy towards him for those things, I don’t want to feel that way about him, it can just be tough sometimes. I’m also good friends with his sister and she is definitely extremely hyper and weird sometimes but I don’t feel judgy towards her, she’s great, and she super friendly, she just has her moments where you start to question her sanity, but she’s really genuine and just a beautiful person. I guess it’s just different when you’re dating someone, because it can be a bit of a turn off. And I worry that it’s bad to feel that way, to feel turned off by that behaviour. And I want to do everything in my power to fix it.

charissepisc...

Date posted: 1y

This is funny because i am the same way. I worry about those annoying things about my partner and if i like him enough. He is really annoying sometimes when he makes inappropriate jokes or just plain isnt funny. Then i feel bad for judging him. I do the same compulsions, trying to change the way i feel about him or trying to love that part of him but i just dont. But i also dont want to leave him and i feel a lot of love for him sometimes too. I think every relationship has burning hatred for the other person here and there lol. Maybe i am choosing the wrong person idk but i dont wanna leave him and dont want him to leave me bc he is the realest thing ive ever had. Maybe just accept that you feel annoyed af when he is like that lol.

charissepisc...

Date posted: 1y

Everyone has their quirks and you dont have to like them

Anonymous_co...

Date posted: 1y

@charissepisces2021 I know it’s really tough, I so badly want to love all those parts of him, but sometimes I can’t and it makes me feel terrible, and it leaves me with a sense of confusion and urgency like I need to fix something or decide then and there how I feel about him and if I’m confident in my feelings. It’s tough. I just want to love him. But I know it’s unrealistic of me to expect myself to always see him through rose coloured glasses. Loving someone doesn’t mean loving all their quirks, it means loving them despite those quirks, and I’m really trying to work on acceptance right now. 🫶

Gmoki

Date posted: 22w

Relationship

I feel so bad I overthink abt everything my bf says and does. I think that if he doesn’t say x y z when I want reassurance then he must’ve stopped caring or is tired of me. I know it’s not the truth and he gives me NO reason to think this way. This is my first healthy relationship and I want to be in each others lives forever. I love him so much and I’m trying my hardest to manage these thoughts but I’m so anxious. It’s so draining I feel helpless and like I can’t go a day without checking his social medias. I want us to be the best versions of ourselves for eachother but idk where to start or how to manage this feeling.

MidoriCora124

Date posted: 22w

My relationship - potential tw???

So I’ve been with my boyfriend for about a month and 27 days and I love him but sometimes I just get the ick when I shouldn’t. I feel that he’s showing me too much affection and repeating things and I don’t wanna be rude and say I’m getting bored. Nor do I want to break up with him. He drove 7 hours just to see me and spent money on me the whole time we were hanging out. And it was fun. The last relationship he ever had was when he was in kindergarten.. so I’m assuming it’s just a new to relationships kind of thing so he accidentally love bombs me but he doesn’t make me feel bad. He’s just so annoying sometimes and I was wondering what I should do. I was considering just being blunt with him whenever I got the ick again. I just feel really bad and like I’m the problem. Thoughts?

Mariabae

Date posted: 20w

im horible

everytime i go out with my bf, he annoys me so much, but i get easily annoyed, he is just being himself and im so so si irritated by him, and i act out and i am rude to him, today i have upset him and he stopped talking to me. i font know what is wrong with me, i dont lnow if i like him, if i still have feelings, if i only want the ideea of the relationship, what if im only attached to him. i dont know anything, i have so many doubts. im so drained, i diny even know if i care that i upset him. i dont know. what if i dont care???

Be a part of the largest OCD Community

Share your thoughts so the Community can respond

Relationship difficulties

Related posts

Be a part of the largest OCD Community

Be a part of the largest OCD Community