- Date posted
- 1y
Why did it come back?
The last few days I have felt amazing! No ruminating! Today out of no where… it came back!!! Why?
The last few days I have felt amazing! No ruminating! Today out of no where… it came back!!! Why?
Recovery is not linear! I was diagnosed in 2020, consider myself well into recovery and still catch myself doing compulsions. That’s okay! Practice self compassion and redirect your attention. You got this
I know how you’re feeling, I’m in a similar boat. I was on the right track towards healing, thoughts were getting to a stage where they weren’t bothering me as such, but something happened this morning and now I’m right back at square one. You’ve got this, you will be alright I promise
@Sasquatch1 That’s exactly the same situation as me! Ugh it’s so hard! Thank you for your kind words. I hope you get through this too!
It’s the nature of OCD and mental illnesses in general. That is why staying present in the moment and accepting the things that come up without fighting or judging them/you is very helpful. It gets you used to the silliness in your mind.
I ruminated too much this morning and got distressing mental images (and confirmation) which sent me spiraling again. How do I stop thinking about this and how do I get back to myself? I feel destroyed.
I've been doing well the past month in cutting down on compulsions and have been feeling better however, last night I had a set back that carried on into today. I had gotten very poor sleep (4ish hours) and then something triggered my memory. I think with the sudden anxiety spike and lack of sleep I didn't have the strength to ignore my compulsions. Last night and today I've realised I've gone back into rumination and mentally reviewing the event excessively again and comparing my situation to other people's, but most of the times that I start going down these rabbit holes I don't even realise I'm doing it? Also been fixating a bit on the fear that I've ruined my progress and that I will fall back into the deep end of it all again, that I have done so much work getting myself out of, although trying my best to not be too discouraged. Does anyone have any advice on how to deal with rumination more specifically?
The past month or so I have been in and out of OCD spirals. I’ll have a couple days of spiraling and then a couple days of being better. Then a couple days spiraling and then a couple days doing better. Today is one of those days where I can feel the anxiety under the surface and where I am monitoring it to see/keep it in check. Yesterday I was good, I had good dialogue in my mind, I was content with making mistakes in the past, but being a better human and person these days going forward. I can feel the ebb and flow of it today where the anxiety spikes, my internal dialogue say “am I going to freak out”, “confess this”, “say that”, “don’t say that”, “I’m a bad person”, “I’m a good person that is learning and growing every day” etc etc. Then the anxiety comes down, my mind feels clearer, less noisy and less physical feeling, and I feel like I don’t care about the OCD and me as much. Just been feeling the ebbs and flows of OCD over the course of months and days, and even within the day itself.
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