- Username
- lovely5
- Date posted
- 5y ago
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- Username
- FernandoVFernandoV
- Date posted
- 5y ago
I don't think I am in the position to tell you what to do or even suggest possible solutions. There is so much I don't know and can't see. The only perspective I can speak from is that of how much harder is for men to deal with depression in general - in most cases we don't even know we are going through something like that. As much as you love him, you need to take care of yourself first. Make sure that you kindly communicate that to him so that he is aware. Sometimes that's what it takes for us to snap out of our dream.
- Username
- FernandoVFernandoV
- Date posted
- 5y ago
It's tough. What you are going through is not easy at all. However - for men shame and sadness is a tricky affair. I am not justifying him. It's just that it's probably hard for him to reach out for help.
- Username
- lovely5lovely5
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Yea I get that. But he doesn't do anything. Like I'll ask him to do laundry and he will put it in the washer but not the dryer. Like he's home all day? Wtf. I feel like after 4 months of having to do everything I'm at my breaking point.
- Username
- scaredbunnyscaredbunny
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Hey there, I thinks it’s really childish, irresponsible and consumerist behavior on his part. I’m very sorry to hear you have to live like that right now. I can totally understand how you don’t want to break up, but what about co-living, but kind of separately? For example, each of you cooks their own food, does their own laundry, spends their own money. It’s not a question of love, it’s a question of some basic quality of life. You can love him, and even support him, emphatize with him maybe, but after all if he’s willing to go to the bottom, you’re not just expected to go there with him. And maybe he needs to visit his GP at least and ask about depression?
- Username
- lovely5lovely5
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Thank you. That makes a lot of sense. I've been trying to do this as it's easier. Especially because I'm vegetarian and he's not so we already eat different meals. The problem is because of my OCD when he doesn't clean his share. I can only leave it a day or two before I'll do it. I can't stand to look at it. Which I'm working on....
Related posts
- Username
- Anonymous
- Date posted
- 4y ago
Hi all... I’m not sure if this is the right place for me here... but I’m suffering... not because I have an OCD I’m here for my husband... who suffers from OCD ( I think) along with a lot of other traits... but it’s hard.. because he doesn’t admit he has a problem.. so obviously I’ve been suffering and been having major anxiety and depression... I’ve sought for help for myself only realise that the root of all my anxiety’s my husband’s behaviour.... I’m not saying I’m perfect... and I know I might not be welcome here because I don’t get OCD... but since my husband has too much of an ego to realise he needs help... I’m only looking for ways to cope from my end... this marriage is long lost in the endless fights we have but I’m too afraid to leave him... because I know he needs help.. n I want to help... also because he also obsesses about me... and I feel trapped...
- Username
- 7710 ❤️
- Date posted
- 2y ago
I really need someone to talk to… just to vent… if not.. i just need get this out and everything can ignore if they want.… I don’t know what to do… I know I’ve been severely obsessing for 2 year about if I truly love my partner or not for 2 years… I am severely saddened about how I feel right now…. Before I knew I wanted to love him and stay.. it felt genuine like I was really mentally sick… but now… my partner looks like a stranger to me, I get annoyed at him easily even if he’s just sitting still… it’s like he’s a different person to me and I hate it… I wanted so badly for me to know if I love him or not… and it’s like our time together never happened… I don’t cuddle talk or do much of anything anymore with him and it bothers me… I feel no emotional connection with him… maybe his flaws are too much for me… 😢😢 I don’t know…. I want to love him again like before but I completely feel like I’m lying to him and myself… I don’t wanna end my relationship I really don’t want to… I do t know how badly ROCD can get but… this is the worst I’ve ever had… my relationship is gonna die… 😢 I’m sitting here quietly crying while he is asleep….
- Username
- elafever@uus...
- Date posted
- 2y ago
Struggling
I feel really scared. For the past 3 months I’ve been having these thoughts that I don’t love my husband and I can’t stay with him. It’s gotten to the point that I have a hard time even being in a room with him because it causes me so much anxiety.I don’t want that to be true at all. I want to feel about him the way I used too. We have built a life together and have been through a lot. I am so scared I am going to lose everything. My husband, my pets, my house, my job. I can’t tell if this is rocd or if I truly don’t love him anymore. I probably shouldn’t even be posting this because it’s reassurance seeking.
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