I had a major breakdown last night in front of my husband and he said that it’s fine but I know it’s frustrating for him bc I deal with relationship ocd. He told me he just wants me to be myself. Which isn’t so easy when u are so confused by all the contradicting thoughts and feelings in my head. I also felt REALLY intense pains in my chest today where my heart is. I’m really afraid that my anxiety will ultimately cause me a heart attack. I’m CONSTANTLY STRESSED and I’m afraid it’s actually killing me.?

It is fine to breakdown. Especially to those who support you. That's healthy to let it out in my opinion. It can be frustrating to your partner but if you're together there has to be understanding from both of you. Of course it's hard on his side but it's hard on your side too. Communicate to help eachother. What if thisvwas cancer? It's be equally as hard. Trust yourself and do the best you can not knowing if he's the one.

I think saying be yourself can be confusing for us with ocd. I think we have to use erp and whatever other tools help to get to our true selves and not let intrusive thoughts define us.

Be compassionate with yourself. You're doing the best you can. And Anthomy is right. Embrace the uncertainty. There is no test you can take to make sure that he's the one. You just have to wait it out and see what happens. And that's really scary and uncomfortable, but all the billions of people before you didn't have any guarantees in their relationship either, and they turned out okay. And so will you.

I do know he’s the one. Well, I want him to be my one

I just don’t want to loose him bc of my OCD