- Date posted
- 5y
- Date posted
- 5y
Something I find that helps me rationalize my ROCD - is comparing my thoughts vs behaviors. I’ll have horrible thoughts about just ending it with my boyfriend, cheating, etc - but then none of these ever come to fruition. In fact, they are the complete opposite of the true affection I feel and the way I show my love through actions. It makes me realize the thoughts are crap. When they pop up, I try to have the “oh here we go again” detached mentality, instead of having a full anxious reaction. Hope this helps. :-)
- Date posted
- 5y
love this way of looking at it! thank you
- Date posted
- 5y
Have you talked to her about it? I find that I only voice about 1% of the junk that OCD puts in my head and because of that I often assume my husband is more aware of how its affecting our relationship than he actually is. You don't need to give specifics, just give her a heads up that if you're acting weirdly it's not something she is doing. As for your side of things all you can do is learn how to accept the discomfort and realise that it's only affecting you so badly because it's the opposite of what you actually feel and value.
- Date posted
- 5y
Soooo helpful folks thanks
Related posts
- Date posted
- 21w
me and my girlfriend since we started dating we be only had one problem, and that is my fear of everything of losing her of her cheating, and it’s all caused by OCD. my texts are massive and i get worried i know i love her and she makes me calm i know i love her. we had a conversation yesterday and basically she said that she feels suffocated with my texts and my fears. she went on trip were she doesn’t have her phone. and yesterday i spent the entire day crying about her. my head is filled with intrusive thoughts. and last night i got so stressed that it seemed like the love went away or i couldn’t remember the love, but it’s impossible because i was crying about her yesterday. this struggle my relationship is having is making me so stressed. pls give me advice
- Date posted
- 5w
Hey, I really need your opinion – I think I might be struggling with Relationship OCD, and these thoughts are driving me crazy. I’ve been officially diagnosed with OCD, and I believe I also have ROCD. My obsessive thoughts often focus on one specific girl from my boyfriend’s past. She had messaged him a few times, and I think she liked him – but he never liked her back. He barely knew her, never found her attractive, and never wanted anything with her. She’s just a good friend of his best friend – not an ex or anything like that. He told me that he happened to be in the same group as her a couple of times – once at a birthday party and once at a fair – just because his best friend brought her along. He made it clear several times that she’s not his type at all, neither in looks nor in personality. He described her as someone who likes to go out and party a lot, and said that’s just not what he’s into. He also said he didn’t ask about her – these things were mentioned to him before our relationship. Almost all of this happened before we met – except for one thing: the fair. That was just one day before our second date, back when we had just started getting to know each other. She was with his friend group that night. He said he only said hi and bye to her, nothing more. The next day, when we met again, we were talking about his friends’ heights. He casually mentioned that his friend was the same height as that girl – 1.70 m. Ever since, I keep wondering: If she meant nothing to him, why did he even talk about her? Or did he actually talk to her that night, even though he said he didn’t? I know he said they barely exchanged a word, but somehow he still knew that detail. I just find that strange. Another example: He once said she was “kind of slutty.” Then, one or two months later, when I brought it up again, he said he didn’t know if she was or not, and that he didn’t care at all. That really confused me. I keep wondering: Why did he say something like that in the first place if he supposedly doesn’t care about her? I also notice this really frustrating cycle: When I talk to him about something that doesn’t make sense to me, I feel brief relief. But then, almost immediately, another thought or detail pops up that feels “off” again – and I feel like I have to bring that up, too. I can’t tolerate the uncertainty. It’s like an endless loop. These little “inconsistencies” – or what I perceive as inconsistencies – make me spiral, even though I do believe he’s being honest with me. I want to trust him. But I have this constant urge to bring up every little thing that doesn’t feel logically right. Every detail stays in my head for days, and it’s really hard not to talk about it. Does this sound like Relationship OCD to you? Do any of you go through this constant analyzing and doubt? I’d really appreciate your thoughts. I’m slowly ruining my own relationship.. Today, for the first time, my partner cried because of it .. I didn’t know how to deal with my thoughts, and seeing him like that made me realize that I really need to change something. Anything that doesn’t make sense to me feels unbearable. And as soon as I talk about one thing, the next thought comes into my head, something else that doesn’t make sense and leaves me feeling uncertain again. I honestly feel extremely helpless right now.. Just as a side note: I was officially diagnosed with ROCD in a previous relationship, not with my current partner, but in a past one.
- Date posted
- 4w
Hi, I have been experiencing the worst relationship anxiety. I have been with my boyfriend for well over 3 years. He is truly amazing and helps me in almost every way. We are both faithful Christian’s. About 7 months ago is when I began having doubts and intrusive thoughts about the relationship: “Am I attracted to him?” “Do I love him?” “Why am I doubting?” “Does God want me to leave?” And it has taken its toll on me. I am to the point now that my worries have worsened into “Do I actually want to be with him?” “How do I know if I want to be with him?” No matter how many times I tell myself that I DO want to be with him, I still question it. Can someone please help me. I don’t want to break up with him. I just can’t even trust myself anymore. I also have not been officially diagnosed with OCD. But, I relate to everything ROCD and have been diagnosed with anxiety.
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