- Date posted
- 6y
- Date posted
- 6y
I was married 39 years and I hit my wife and she just divorced me and moved away. I am crushed I cry all day like a tired baby relationships are precious and marriage is forever. I looked at girls like all men do my wife helped me! We were a beautiful pair and I ruined it. I say that because I value relationships and forgiveness. life will be even tougher, these little issues help us build our defenses for the big problems . Thank you for hearing me out and good luck.
- Date posted
- 6y
Thank you for being honest
- Date posted
- 6y
Decide if you can trust him in the future after this - if this is going to make you feel like you can’t trust him, the relationship will suffer and won’t be worth the pain. Trust is the most important element to a relationship and he has betrayed yours to an extent. No one can tell you what to do, but he did was hurtful and not acceptable within the bounds of a relationship, whether you guys are young and inexperienced or not. Ask him what his intentions were by doing that and if he wants to be in a committed relationship, but ultimately it’s about if you’ll feel secure in the relationship or not. I think this is a justified reason to worry, it’s probably not your ocd.
- Date posted
- 6y
What's up?
- Date posted
- 6y
@nocturnalgyal my boyfriend and i got in a fight we were on good terms, we both messed up i guess. while such happened he went back and texted a girl “ i wish u were single” i talked it out i got mad he apologized it semeee genuine and i took it i’m anxious it isn’t right what i decided should i forgive him? it’s so weird i’m so scared i don’t wanna feel like breaking up but i kinda do. ): should i just let it go i don’t know i feel gross
- Date posted
- 6y
Sorry, it's hard to follow. So you guys got into a fight and he ended up texting some random girl "I wish you were single"? And he aoolized and now you're conflicted with ending the relationship right?
- Date posted
- 6y
@NocturnalGyal Yes ): i don’t wanna end up but everyone’s telling me too and i feel like i havw too i wanna forgive him but it’s impossible to wrap my mind around that right now i’m so overwhelmed ): idk what i need to do
- Date posted
- 6y
wow Thank u so much for ur honesty really helped me look at the bigger picture .. do you personally feel like rhis is just a small issue that can be let go or would that be dumb of me ):
- Date posted
- 6y
I’m somewhat young i’m still in highschool i guess i’m immature and i need mature advice on if this is worth ending it or what ):
- Date posted
- 6y
it’s slowly turning into an obsessive thought i have rocd so it would make sense but my heads telling me i just say that because i don’t wanna break up and want reassurance on what to do hm..
- Date posted
- 6y
Honestly, what you need to do is have a serious convo with him. And tell him how that text message made you feel. And just ask him what he was thinking when he texted that. Communication can go a loooooong way, even if it's hard. So before making any impulsive decisions, just have a talk with him about it. How long have you guys been together?
- Date posted
- 6y
I've had a very similar experience. To be honest it depends how you feel about your relationship. I was completely destroyed at first because like you, I did not want to end things but felt like I had to. We ended up just taking space for a few days then meeting back up to talk it out. We are still together. In the end, I found out that my boyfriend was struggling severely with mental health issues that I had no idea about. I'd say you have to talk to him and tell him to be honest with why he did it and you need to evaluate if you both want the same thing for your relationship. You need to see if he really regrets his mistake or if there is something else going on. Take some space to breath before making any decisions okay? Don't decide what you should or shouldn't do based on what you think others will think of you.
- Date posted
- 6y
thank you so much @mochi i think i am going to talk to him about it in person ): and forgive him because he did it out of anger and impulsiveness and he seems really genuine ,, hm
- Date posted
- 6y
you’re right @fifi95 thank you so much ?❤️
Related posts
- Date posted
- 24w
I don’t know where to begin, this is going to be very long. But whoever responds I appreciate you dearly. I’m 20 years old, I’ve dealt with a lot in my childhood with abandonment and insecurity issues from my family. Aswell of not having a role model of a healthy relationship shown to me as a child. Me and my boyfriend have been together for 3 years, my first healthy relationship. Last year I discovered OCD (I am diagnosed but I ignored my mental health as a teenager like anybody would) I started to get these feelings that I don’t love my partner/he’s not attractive enough/ etc etc. I’ve discovered that it’s ROCD. I made threads on Reddit asking for advice googling for reassurance, all the things as one would do with ocd (as I’m doing now!) One day I woke up and that theme was gone, I felt normal in my relationship for about 4 months with no terrible thoughts. As of about 2-3 months ago, my theme switched. Now I have a fear he doesn’t love me, he’s cheating, he doesn’t want to marry me. It has utterly consumed me (just like my last theme!) I check his phone an unhealthy amount (guess what I never find anything!) He always lets me go through his phone, but as anyone would he gets annoyed and frustrated. I always am searching for signs if he’s acting weird, will get into arguments 24/7 because my brain keeps telling me he’s cheating, I get fake scenarios in my brain, hell I even bought Snapchat+ to stalk his snap score. But ever single time I find nothing. A lot of things trigger me and I over analyze everything, phone calls who his texting. When I do search his phone I check his EMAIL because of how paranoid I am. When I see things on social media about people cheating I SPIRALLLL But what really triggered me was this scenario, his family loves to joke around with me and mess with him at the same time, especially with our relationship, saying I have a leash on him etc etc making jokes (which I can take but when I’m in an ocd spiral and they have no idea something’s are triggering) anyways, we were out to lunch and his mother texts him “are u at some girls house” he told me straight away then responded “why would u say that” then she proceeded to say she’s messing around with him. And sent a picture of me and said I’m with Hailey at lunch, then they had a normal conversation after. Obviously this sent me into a spiral, it still bothers me. I was so upset and anxious, when we got back to his house I went through that man’s phone like it was my only job in the world. And I search EVERYTHING not one thing goes untouched. (I sound insane) anyways we went back to his place, then he called his mom to come in his room and asked why she said that, she felt guilty and said she was messing around she had her hands in her head (mind you she’s been drinking probably just messing around with him when she texted that) she told me not to worry ever about that kind of stuff because her son is not that type of man, she proceeded to leave the room then texted me about how sorry she was and didn’t mean to freak me out and felt like shit about it. Ever since then she’s been acting kind of weird towards me (not really) maybe she’s uncomfortable or there’s another women idk LOL. Anyways yea what the hell do I do I literally can’t function properly.
- Date posted
- 22w
can someone help im confused by my actions adults only please preferably women (im a woman and feel more okay talking to women)
- Date posted
- 19w
Hey everyone. I hope you all are doing okay. I’m currently struggling in the worse way I have through the course of my relationship. We are doing long distance right now, and I am unfortunately in the worse place I have been in. The uncertainty is absolutely unbearable. He is doing a cool new, consuming job 7 hours a way. He loves it, but I fear him loving the job so much that he stops caring about me. I have definitely noticed a shift in the amount of time he texts me and the energy he can give to the relationship. The job actually started off with 2 weeks of no phone. He has it again now though. We saw each other a couple of days ago in person for the last time we would in about two months. I was okayish when we were in person though I knew I would spiral later. And spiral I did. He left and I broke down. I am worried I will lose him. I start a really intensive EMT program in a week. It will be all-consuming for me. I can’t sleep very much and I don’t feel like eating. I know it’s pathetic. I am constantly consumed by these fears. I think I know what I need to do to combat them. Accept uncertainty but it feels like the possibly of it ending feels more real than ever. And I literally can NOT stop thinking about it. My brain feels in danger!!! I just worry that bad stuff is actually happening. I think we are going through a rough patch, but I also just feel more alone than ever. Drowning in my mind. What do I believe? I have a past of ocd, so it wouldn’t be surprised if it’s getting intertwined. Most people would say: it’s okay to ask him for reassurance about the relationship!!! But I feel like that’s the trap for me. I don’t know how to move forward. I know things are tough for us right now. But I’ve been floating back and forth on a spectrum of well maybe I just have trust to maybe this literally won’t work out!!! Texting and communicating over text is really hard for me. I am constantly analyzing it: how much energy is he giving? How much energy am I giving? Well I don’t want to do all the emotional labor, and be the main texter. But I also don’t care about texting that much and get exhausted with this back and forth.
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