Advice please

I have a huge problem, and I don’t know how to stop overthinking it. For context, my boyfriend is not the type to jump to conclusions like “Oh, that girl looked at me, she must like me.” He’s always realistic and doesn’t assume things without reason. Lately, I’ve lost most of my friends, and now the only person I have besides my boyfriend is my best friend of five years. We’ve been through everything together—friendship breakups, different social circles—and in the end, it’s always been the two of us. Right now, it’s just me, her, and my boyfriend in our little friend group, and we all get along well. We even have plans to go to a festival together this summer. But this past Friday, my boyfriend told me something that completely threw me off. He said that he doesn’t want to make assumptions, but it seems like my best friend might be looking at him in a certain way. He wasn’t saying it’s 100% true, just that he noticed something. The problem is, I already had this intrusive thought before—“What if she likes him?”—and now that he mentioned it, it’s making me spiral even more. I feel like I’m acting weird around her now, and I hate it. I feel like I’m betraying her in my own mind by even considering this idea, because I know she loves me and would never do something like that. It’s completely absurd, yet I can’t stop thinking about it. To make things even more complicated, my 18th birthday is coming up in two months. My plan was to go on a small trip with both my boyfriend and my best friend, but when I mentioned it to my dad, he shut it down immediately and said, “You don’t have to take her everywhere.” And now, I feel stuck. I don’t know how to tell her that I might just want to go with my boyfriend without making her feel left out or hurting her feelings. But at the same time, this is a huge milestone in my life, and of course, I want my best friend there. I hate that these intrusive thoughts are making me question everything—“What if she likes him? What if she ends up liking him?” My mom recently told me a story about a woman whose best friend stole her husband, and now my brain won’t let it go. I’m dreading the idea of us all being in the same hotel room this summer for the festival. It’s like my mind is preparing for something bad to happen, even though nothing has actually happened. I don’t want to think this way. I don’t want to feel uncomfortable around her. How do I stop these thoughts from ruining everything?

I’m at a loss about what to do. I’ve been with my partner for about a year. I’ve wanted to be with him for 3 years and now I finally have him, I got out of a really toxic 11 year relationship about 4 years ago so I’ve had plenty of time to heal, things where going so great at first in our relationship and I’m still very much happy with him, I love him more than anything, but the past 5 6 months I’ve been having a constant fear that he’s gonna cheat or watch 🌽behind my back any chance he gets , I know that’s a touchy subject for some, but me personally it just makes me feel that I’m not attractive enough,or feel like I’m not good enough, I’ve never found evidence of cheating, and I’ve found 🌽 in his history once but I told him how I felt and he told me he understood how I felt and wouldn’t do it again,and I know the constant asking everyday and needing for reassurance with it is putting a tear in our relationship, I just want to fix it. Does anyone have any advice on how to redirect my brain whenever I start overthinking about it when I’m not around him? It just puts so much stress on me when I’m not around him cause I’m just constantly in my head about it.

Tw* abuse / coercion I recently broke up with an ex we were on and off five years. I woke up this morning with disturbing memories of things that he did. Previous of my ex I dated a guy in 9th grade who took advantage of me he asked me to perform an ( oral act) I didn’t know how to do. I agreed and he was rough with me eventually I told him to stop multiple times and eventually I was able to break myself free from him. Now my ex of 5 years we made out a lot but we hadn’t made it to a certain part. In public he would always groupe me and when we would go back to his car to make out ( I was 14 he was 17). As teenagers I didn’t have a problem about the making out we were both horny teens but my issue was this one night. I remember the exact date we made out but he was more aggressive then he usually was and he wanted to take things further I told him no I’m not ready for that. Every time I said no he would make out with me more aggressively to change my mind and at some point we both ended up in our underwear. He then kept begging me to basically ( continue with the rest of it ) I told him no multiple times until I eventually gave in and said yes because he wouldn’t budge to me saying no and every time I did he would make out with me more aggressively. Once I said yes the rest was history. I remember that night I layed in bed crying and my skin felt disgusting like I wanted to rip it off. I slept there with no blanket without changing my clothes because I felt shame. Now that I left him finally I still get disturbing memories of that night and the other times after that he would beg me to do acts and if I kept saying no he would grab me aggressively or groupe me aggressively. I have never told anyone in my life this story because idk how they would react to this. I feel like I was sexually coerced and abused and he will do it with another girl. And I blame myself for thinking he would ever change. Prior to me breaking up with him we would make out but even when I told him no he would start kissing me aggressively until I gave in and when I denied it all together he would act like a baby. I hold myself accountable for us making out but sometimes I didn’t want to and he would ignore that. Other times he would groupe me in public and make out with me then beg for head. Sometimes I wish I had someone to guide me and teach me about people like this because I am an older sister of sisters. I have a father that I am not close with and he’s narcissistic like my ex. I just hate the memories because they literally come at any part of the day. I feel like some of the things he did to me I forgot some of them and that’s why they come back.