Saskia
- Date posted
- 5y
xMariaxxMariax
- Date posted
- 5y
I don't think that fearing losing them is part of OCD. It is a normal feeling when you love a person, but if you are obssessing about your partner talking to others and loving somebody else and stuff, that is ROCD acting too. Try to look for Awaken Into Love, I think they have a post talking about 2 types of ROCD
SaskiaSaskia
- Date posted
- 5y
You're right! This is more than a normal fear, it's just stressing me so so much that I'm having an obsessive behavior about it. Like it's impacting my everyday life and a few month later the fear of "what if I'm not in love anymore" arrive. Now I got both of them, even if it's contradictory. I'll look at the video of Awaken Into Love as quickly as possible! Thank you again
xMariaxxMariax
- Date posted
- 5y
I guess it is normal. There are 2 types of ROCD. Currently Im dealing with "Maybe I don' love him"and sometimes I get thoughts telling me that he is tired of me and doesn't love anymore without any proof. However I dont obssess about them as I have with the doubts about if I love him or not
SaskiaSaskia
- Date posted
- 5y
Thank you so much to both of you! It's just that the thoughts seems so true sometime that I don't know what to think. I was wondering a lot if the fact that I'm afraid to lose my boyfriend, and afraid of not loving him anymore at the same time is ROCD? Because I see a lot of people talking about the fear of not being in love with your partner, but not a lot about the fear of your partner falling out of love
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 5y
@Olympea You being afraid your partner doesn't love you means you care so much about him. Also if this helps, I have read cases of ROCD where people are afraid there partner doesn't love them. If you haven't already, try talking to your partner about it. I felt better when my girlfriend actually knew what was going on in my head. Also sorry if I have punctuation errors. Im terrible for that when im typing on my phone.
SaskiaSaskia
- Date posted
- 5y
@LoganJefford Don't worry for punctuations errors I'm not an English native speaker! And yes I already talk about this with him and he was so understanding and kind. He always reassure me and I know that my fear probably came from nowhere but it's still here, or it turns into "what if I'm not in love anymore" sometimes. It's veery weird
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 5y
ROCD is an annoying subset of OCD. I have it and I too get thoughts like "what if I don't love her". That annoying voice in your head will always try to find the next best thing to stress you out if you start to gain control of a thought. But, remember these thoughts do not mean they are true. It may feel real but if someone truly wanted to end the relationship with their significant other. They would do it without any obsessive thoughts. In conclusion, you care about your partner, you love them and they love you.
SaskiaSaskia
- Date posted
- 5y
xMariaxxMariax
- Date posted
- 5y
And I understand, Ive been dealing with this since March and it has been hell. My thought have been about me not loving him or loving him only as a friend
SaskiaSaskia
- Date posted
- 5y
I understand you so much this is so hard to deal with!
scaredbunnyscaredbunny
- Date posted
- 5y
I agree with @xMariax, ROCD latches on the fear of abandonment. For instance, I used to think my husband (boyfriend at a time) will leave me. It was crazy but at least I knew that I didn’t want him to go, so I felt sane. However, after the wedding and his not leaving me and insisting the he loves me for a few years, I think I was forced to acknowledge that I am safe with this relationship. But now I’m so hooked on being scared of abandonment that now I fear that something from within me will ruin everything.
skeletonroseskeletonrose
- Date posted
- 5y
I just made a post about this too sort of it’s so hard to figure it out. Do you feel like you love him or do you feel like you don’t? Or is it confusing? Ugh this struggle is so hard
Related posts
Anonymous79276
- Date posted
- 19w
Relationship ocd
I can’t stop thinking to myself “what if I don’t love her” but deep down I know I love her and that’s why I’m getting pissed off with these unwanted thoughts because it’s putting doubt in my head when in reality I love her what should I do?
clair_m88
- Date posted
- 16w
Help :( ROCD & object permanence
Does anyone else struggle with object permanence in relationships? Like whenever my partner is out of the house I immediately think negatively or I find things wrong with the relationship or him… For background my partner and I always fight over chores (I know it’s common but it’s annoying) I definitely pull more weight than him and I think he has ADHD, which makes him struggle to help and be aware of helping. Lately we’ve been somewhat good with splitting meals and dishes whatever, I know it can change with work stress, fatigue whatever. But last week my partner was out of the house watching his uncle’s dog so he was barely home. He was sleeping over at his uncles house and would come home for meals sometimes and stuff like that. I started becoming super fixated on him not helping with the dishes before he left and would constantly feel urges to yell about it. Even though the week prior everything was good when it came to that (sometimes with my ROCD I’ll even question myself and be like was it?) so I have started 4 separate fights arguing about dishes and chores and mentioning that he doesn’t help enough and if this continues I’ll have to leave… it’s so hard for me to snap out of it and just realize that he was going back and forth and didn’t think to help because he was busy with helping his uncle. And then I get such a negative view of him in my head that I nitpick his appearance, I make comments, etc, because my underlying fear is he doesn’t care to help, he will never change, and we will fail. So it’s almost like I’m looking to have a reason to run before I actually need to? It’s a constant cycle for me and I’m truly so exhausted by myself. But also relationships are so hard for me because I struggled SO much with trying to depend on others that I almost don’t let myself depend on others…. Any advice is appreciated but also just like do you also experience this? Thank you & pls be kind 🥺🥺🥺
LizM99
- Date posted
- 8w
Is this something OCD does?
Whenever anyone starts to feel like their thoughts are less triggering or they feel a moment of happiness/ relief OCD tells you that you want the thoughts back or you actually like having the thoughts and maybe thats just the person I really am? I feel like im going insane😢
Be a part of the largest OCD Community
Share your thoughts so the Community can respond