Fear of losing control

All of my intrusive thoughts feel like they are centered on my fear of losing control. I picture myself being locked up or tied to a bed because of losing control of my mind. My mind taunts me with intrusive thoughts, words, phrases, images, feelings or lack of feelings. I remember at a young age having anxiety and going to my mother for advice. She told me I was having a nervous breakdown. That’s the last thing a little kid would want to hear rather than the comfort of their mother. Since she uttered those words to me I’ve always had this sense of not being in control. I even often have trouble relaying this to my therapist which causes more anxiety. I think to myself If I can’t get my point across how can I get better. Can anyone relate to my situation?

Sd721

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 42w

Hey, I can absolutely relate. I remember having anxiety/ panic attacks at a young age too. I feel like I get flashbacks of those memories often, and if I let myself focus on them, a wave of intense emotion always comes through. There’s one specific memory that will always stick with me: I’m 10 years old, sitting on my bed, trying to tell my mom how awful I feel and how scared I am, even though I know the things I’m scared about aren’t that big of a deal to other people. She threatened me in response, and told me that “if I don’t stop being anxious about xyz, she will take me to an insane asylum & leave me there.” So much of my OCD is centered around the fear of losing control of my mind or my body, and then fear of abandonment if I do anything “wrong” that might cause someone to judge me. I feel you and I hear you. ❤️ I’m so sorry you went through that with your mom, you are not alone

JV24

Date posted: 42w

@Sd721 Thank you! I do appreciate the kind words. This is a real pain in the ass to deal with. I’m now 41 and been dealing with multiple themes of OCD my entire life. Sometimes I can brush off the thoughts for years. I’ve been great for about 8 years with the thoughts still there but not paying much attention to them. This time my intrusive thoughts are back full swing and causing so much anxiety. Just had my 4th session of therapy. We are trying to figure out the underlying fear. I believe it’s always been the fear of losing control. My therapist pushes me for something deeper. Maybe we are on to something. I’m hopeful but anxious at the same time. I’m anxious that I won’t see results or get better. Thanks again for the reply. Sometimes it helps more than people realize. Stay strong!

Lilly2442!

Date posted: 40w

I have the exact same fear of losing control and I also get vivid images of myself losing control, which then causes more anxiety. How are you doing?

JV24

Date posted: 40w

@Lilly2442! Thanks for asking. I recently been trying some new techniques that I watched on YouTube. My biggest issue is the rumination. If I can catch myself from ruminating and halt it before I get too deep I feel like the thoughts start to ease. It’s so hard not to address a disturbing thought. I’ve been going with the “cool” , “is that the best you can do OCD” phrases. lol How is your journey?

Holl1

Date posted: 21w

OCD

I’ve tried living in the uncertainty today & kept myself busy but I can’t shake this feeling that I’m about to lose control & act on my thoughts. I keep feeling like I need to check in to see how I feel & keep my self safe & when I’m near my trigger it feels like I’m being pulled into doing it & feels like I want to but I’m not using compulsions. My thoughts feel like my own & feeling like I’ll be like this forever. Can someone relate or give advice 😩

Harm OCD

Schoolie93

Date posted: 20w

Intrusive thoughts & Panic

Hello does anyone get such severe panic and anxiety that comes along with bad intrusive thoughts. Then the thoughts give you more panic because you feel you may act on them? Then I worry I’m going crazy, can anyone relate? Thank for reading

kenzieisfound

Date posted: 19w

fear of losing control??

I’ve never been diagnosed with OCD, but I relate so much to what people here are going through. I used to think it was just anxiety, and I felt like I could handle that. But lately I’ve been spiraling—constantly afraid that what I’m feeling is something worse, like psychosis or losing control of my mind. I feel so detached and scared, and I just want peace again. I have anxiety doing the smallest things, like the thought of waking up everyday and even eating give me straight up panic. I am afraid all the time, it’s paralyzing. And a lot of people say someone with psychosis wouldn’t worry that they’re in it, but then I convince myself I’ve been in it this whole time, and haven’t known, and that maybe I’ve been doing weird stuff. Idk. I also get really scared of labels. Even the idea of OCD makes me feel like I’ll never get better or like I’ll be stuck like this forever. I just want to be okay. If anyone has felt this way—confused, overwhelmed, or scared of what’s happening in their mind—I’d really appreciate any support or encouragement.

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Fear of losing control

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