gender identity ocd tips

I'm starting testosterone soon and suddenly I'm feeling more anxious about regret and being wrong. I was on reddit (that was my first mistake) and a post popped up on my feed and it was a cis woman saying she did some soul searching and realized she wasn't a trans man after all. she said that she was a tomboy growing up and dealt with trauma that she needed to detach from. it shook me a bit and now I'm scared that I'm making the wrong choice. does anyone have any tips to get rid of this constant doubt?

Anonymous

Date posted: 17w

Taking hormones for any reason would be scary and it’s okay to take time on big decisions like that. Hormones control so many things and when we stop producing them or start taking them our chemistry is affected so dramatically. It’s a big deal and it sounds like you’re considering something that will make a huge impact on your life. It’s okay to take time to think it through carefully before proceeding.

adrian1225

Date posted: 17w

i don’t think there is a way to get rid of the doubt & fear, at least not entirely. i got top surgery in august 2021, and throughout the whole process of finding a surgeon, getting it approved by insurance, & pre op appointments i had this worry in the back of my mind: what if i regret it? even though there was an overwhelming amount of evidence that indicated that was not going to be what happened. i’ve been MUCH happier, more comfortable in my skin & generally more confident since getting the surgery, but i don’t think a single moment has gone by where i haven’t been at least a little scared that eventually i might think i’ve made a huge mistake and be really unhappy that i don’t have breasts. but i haven’t felt that way yet, and i have no way of knowing what i will feel later. all i know is how i feel now, and the way i feel is happy and right being flat chested. and honestly, even if maybe someday you have an epiphany that you’re not actually trans, if transitioning is something that makes your life better now, how could you ever regret it? even if it’s not what you wanted forever it’s what you wanted at some point, and that counts for something. also there’s no shame in stopping if you feel it’s not right for you. it doesn’t automatically mean you’re wrong or have made a mistake. sometimes reality just differs from our expectations, and that’s okay.

sofiaraaah7

Date posted: 17w

I have the same OCD but in reverse, as a cis girl fearing transition. Tell you what, the possibility of detransitioning is very low, (below 1% I think) and OCD LOVESSS to make a very small possibility into a 100% probability, but it really is just a malfunction in our brain that falsely detects a non-existent threat. I know it feels very real and threatening though and I’m sorry I don’t have better advice but I’m here for you if you need further help. Gender OCD sucks :((

xoxoacid

Date posted: 19w

How do I get rid of these thoughts or calm down

I've been really overwhelmed with thoughts of detransitioning even though I don't want to like thinking I'm not a boy. It's been making my anxiety go up like crazy but I've never had this problem this much before, and I've always felt so proud of who I was and stuff but I don't know why this is coming up all of a sudden and I'm scared. I don't want to detransition but these thoughts won't go away. I often have feminine interests and have been trying to get into a better mindset and I feel like those things are making me feel more feminine and I don't want to feel that way.

gwen_weaver

Date posted: 15w

am i trans or am i confused?

My boyfriend is ftm, and I’m very supportive of him and his journey with gender. It opened a lot of conversations between us about each others gender/sexuality. I’ve known for a long time that i’m pan, but I’ve struggled a lot with my own gender. My OCD causes me to doubt myself a lot, one day i feel hyper feminine and have no desire to identify as a man, but the next day I am extremely dysphoric about my body/hair/voice and wonder if I’m ftm as well? and then it goes away the next day. Some days I don’t even feel feminine OR masculine. I spend a lot of my time ruminating over if i’m trans, and abt the possibility of me spending the rest of my life either not knowing, or settling for whatever’s easiest for myself and everyone around me. I don’t know if I actually believe I’m a man, or if I’m pretending, or if it’s just in my head. Its like I don’t know what to trust since my opinion is different every day, and it feels like I can’t trust my own intuition. It’s starting to affect my sex drive, my sleep, my self confidence, and my self image. It’s really confusing me and I’m wondering if anyone can relate or has some advice. Thank you:)

Dreamydream

Date posted: 12w

TOCD

2 nights ago I saw something on my phone and it has now spiraled into me scared of being trans or being gay because i don’t want to be… now i have a huge fear of what if i am gay and am attracted to woman or what if im not comfortable in my body and want to turn into a man. It’s freaking me out - my ocd always makes me question my character! Has anyone experienced this 😩

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