So I have harm ocd for sure and I get triggered by some m1rder cases like for some reason my brain gets latched to them and the perpetrators my brain goes ‘what if they’d find you attractive’ ‘would you be one of their victims’ and it feels like they’re watching me, if that makes sense, like they’re watching me, is this a symptom of any type of OCD? Please no judgement I’m super scared and I hate that my brain does this
It sounds like you're going through a very frightening and distressing experience. Intrusive thoughts, especially those that latch onto disturbing subjects, can be incredibly overwhelming and make you question yourself. What you're describing, the intense fear and the feeling of being watched, can indeed be a manifestation of how OCD torments individuals. Many people with OCD experience similar unwanted, intrusive thoughts that cause significant distress. If you’d like additional support, feel free to book a free call with our NOCD team. We’d be happy to share more information and explore ways to help. No one has to live in fear of their own thoughts. Also here are some helpful resources: https://www.treatmyocd.com/what-is-ocd/common-fears/im-always-afraid-of-being-watched-is-there-something-wrong
@Brooke Tominey Thank you!
Are you diagnosed or are you generally wondering if you could have OCD bc of this?
@sarah.ek I’m not diagnosed yet but I show a lot of the signs, but my therapist says since I have little to no physical compulsions she’s confused on how I have it, she is not trained in OCD
@emmagracee Wether or not you have OCD, this is definitely Obsessive Behavior. Having little to no physical compulsions isn’t necessarily an indicator of not having OCD, many people have stronger mental symptoms. I actually started off having little to no mental symptoms and lots of compulsions, now I have little to no physical symptoms and lots of obsessive thoughts. OCD can (and perhaps inevitably will) change. I’d suggest you mention this to your therapist and if they don’t react well, you should probably find a new one.
@sarah.ek I told her that but she’s still confused, and that’s hard cause NOCD doesn’t take my insurance
@emmagracee I understand. I myself am not from the US, therefore it is also basically impossible for me to have an NOCD therapist. There are still other therapists out there that do specialize in Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, and you could also possibly introduce her to NOCD as a research tool? Obviously this still seems rather unprofessional from her, but it might help for now
@sarah.ek She doesn’t really research it, she told me they’re MDD intrusive thoughts which don’t line up, or ADHD intrusive thoughts, which I don’t think line up, ever since she said I don’t have Obsessive Compulsive PERSONALITY Disorder, she hasn’t looked into regular OCD since
@emmagracee I’m so sorry to hear about your experience :( Sadly even a lot of medical professionals don’t know much about OCD. It’s so misunderstood. I hope things work out for you and that one day you will be able to get the proper help you need
@OneDayAtATimee Tyy! In your opinion, could this be a symptom of ocd?
@emmagracee Oh 100%! I’ve had Harm Ocd in the past so I can relate. And what your therapist said about you not exhibiting physical compulsions- many Ocd sufferers deal greatly with mental compulsions (like rumination). Because it’s in our heads- that goes unnoticed to people on the outside. Btw just extra info: we all still do physical compulsions in small ways. For example, a lot of ppl use their eyes and hands to type posts seeking reassurance in this app. Some people use their mouths to verbally confess their thoughts. Some people look at a person’s body language when they seek reassurance (to see how the person reacts). These are veryyy subtle physical compulsions that often go unnoticed, just like mental compulsions sadly do as well. Some therapists even say there’s no such thing as “Pure-O” because most likely everyone with OCD does tiny physical compulsions like this
@OneDayAtATimee I think a physical compulsion is at night I feel very unsafe getting out of bed unless it’s an even number, it’ll take me hours to get out of bed at like 2:00 am because my mind convinces me I’m unsafe unless it’s an even number and I’ll be physically hurt, and when I deal with the thoughts I like slap my thigh or chew my hair or rub my face probably not physical compulsions and also I cover my forehead with my hand I feel like I can’t see them anymore when I do that
@emmagracee Those def sound like they could be physical compulsions 👍 Also staying in bed sounds like one as well. Because you’re doing those things in response to an intrusive thought, feeling, urge, etc. For example, you stay in bed to stay safe and we do compulsions in order to stay safe. Compulsions often provide us with relief (but def not always)
@OneDayAtATimee Thank you! Just the topic of the post really gets me this was set off since a guy commented on a post of mine(not on this app on TikTok) and I looked at his account and I went to his reposts and he was reposting things abt Elliot Rogers and it just startled me I hope this is a symptom of harm ocd so I can have an explanation
@emmagracee Oh yeah totally! Being “triggered” by seeing/hearing something harm related is 100% a symptom of Harm Ocd 👍
@OneDayAtATimee Tyy! Have a lovely day!
@emmagracee Thank you :D you as well! 🌞
so this all started not too long ago, for literally no reason at all. but one day i got a random intrusive thought about harming others and it freaked me out bad. since then i’ve been non stop focusing on it and im genuinely scared that i am, or gonna end up like those sick people that have documentaries about them. i’ve never had these types of thoughts before and after me and my mom looked a lot of stuff up we think i have OCD cuz a lot of the stuff it was saying was accurate to me. to anyone in here, does this sound like OCD to you? i’ve always been a nice loving person and these thoughts freak me out so bad and make me feel like i’m a bad gross person. it got to the point i don’t even like looking at myself anymore. i just wanna go back to normal man. another thing to add, when i would explain this to my mom even though i was telling the full truth on how crappy this made me feel it felt like i was lying almost? but i know i wasn’t deep down. i’m just scared that what if i act on something or get in my head too much you know?
maybe a therapist can respond or anyone who relates and experiences this also?? im trying to make sense . ever since ocd started, specifically harm ocd and pocd, sexual themes ocd in general, my brain makes everything sexual or gross. or just makes inappropriate connections with quite literally anything. or any person I see I wonder if they are a p, or if they are “like me”, because im fully convinced at times that im some weird or bad person, and then when i see actual criminals etc i cant help but compare myself to them it’s so weird?????? or sometimes I feel like i cant judge a p because im no different than them?? idk its so weird. rn writing this ik im not a p like what im just struggling with really bad ocd and trauma I hope :( It’s just my brain distorts everything and then it makes me feel worse, like “ur an actual p or pervert because see??? ur brain is sexualizing everything?” hopefully this makes sense
I’ve always struggled with maladaptive daydreaming I’ve stopped but I have harm ocd and my brain would hook onto a true crime story and I’d pretend to be a family member/loved one/victim of a k*ller and would make up elaborate stories abt it. That feels so disgusting I’m so scared this shows in a horrible person doesn’t it? And now my brain is telling me I have found k*llers attractive in the past I don’t think I ever did but what if I did I’m scared
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