Is this irrational thinking?

A year ago I went to a portable potty downtown and I used the toilet paper 🧻 in there. A couple months later or days later can’t remember. My friend was like “I would never use a portable potty or the toilet paper in there. Have you heard about the drug addicts cleaning their needles by poking it in the toilet paper and now a year later it came up again because I masturbated the day before and went to work the next day and as I was using the restroom it hit me what if when I got up and put my pants back on some flung on to the toilet paper next to me. Now I’m thinking great everyone who used the paper is now infected with an std or something bc I MIGHT have std from the day I went to the porta potty a year ago. I feel so alone and lost and anxious and scared. I feel like I’m the only one with this specific scenario. Can I even get infected like that?

SAGUI

Date posted: 17h

Dude, I worry about that too. If it had a shield over it I think it should be fine. I once sat on a toilet and I know it’s stupid but I asked the guy next to me, “Hey, can you AIDS from a toilet seat?” And he laughed but I was genuinely worried.

Jher55

Date posted: 17h

@SAGUI Yea dude, it’s a pain in the ass cause you’d like to move on from it but at the same time it’s serious in a way. And it’s just like damn! What I did for sure that I can remember was I literally rolled out the entire roll so no one would be able to use it and then on top of that where the shield is cause it’s like this metal ones that have another roll up top of the bottom one and once the first one is out the second comes down and it was up there shielded but the bottom you can see it a bit and so I freaked out and rolled some out but I never rolled the tire thing out and after I came back from lunch I was thinking about it like what if I didn’t get enough rolled out and there’s still residue that soaked in and who knows how many people used it within the hour and that’s what scares me.

Jher55

Date posted: 17h

Honestly for all we know I might not even have std and that porta potty might not even have had that to begin with and I’m over here just believing what OCd “thinks is true”.

Mike6060

Date posted: 16h

You wouldn't get an STD from the toilet paper even if a drug addict used it to clean a needle. The blood for one would've been dry and the virus dies with exposure to the air very quickly.

Jher55

Date posted: 15h

@Mike6060 Really? Does that go for aids as well hiv? Or is all that under the umbrella of STD?

Mike6060

Date posted: 11h

@Mike6060 There is also a platform or forum with an abundance of questions already asked and answered there that may be applicable to you and your concerns. However, from one OCDer to another, it's hard to lose the fear, right?

Jher55

Date posted: 11h

@Mike6060 Yea it really is. What’s the forum? And It’s really really hard! And I hate it. My sister told me that HIV(aids) is fragile and can live on cold areas for a bit but eventually die out after a minute or so. So I’ve calmed down but I’m scared if I go to the website you’re referring, what if what my sister told me is wrong? Hence OCD already doing its job.

Mike6060

Date posted: 9h

Yes, OCD doing its job. Don't I understand. Well, do you find your sister to be a reliable source for the information? I'm saying pretty much the same thing she is. If so, there is no need to go on the site. Stick with the facts each time your mind creates a new idea or scenario that threatens you by making you think you got an STD from the bathroom. You ultimately want a reliable source providing you the facts. That's a start. Do you have an issue with STDs often, or this perceived exposure was an infrequent one? Btw, you are definitely not the only one with this issue I promise that. There are many people who worry about getting an STD from objects.

Jher55

Date posted: 8h

I do. She has background knowledge of this stuff. She’s in the medical field. Not a nurse but a medical assistant and deals with different patients to a certain degree. My mind says yes but there is a hint of curiosity as to what I will find in the site but I know that it can go both ways. Either it will benefit me or torture me and elongate the what ifs so I’m kind of stuck. But overall she seems to have the same facts as some other people I’ve seen on here including yourself like you had mentioned. It’s just the HIV AIDS part that I am still concerned. but overall she said if I did have that I would’ve noticed it a long time ago by physical appearance, weight loss and health conditions . And I will. It will be hard just because I have gotten to a point where every little thing is a what if. From work to past events to at home. Every little thing I do. And it scares about everything it can come up no matter the scenario. but the compulsion part is what I fail at bc I “need an answer” which I can get but will never satisfy ocd. And honestly this is the second time out of a year span and it wasn’t a big issue until I let OCD make it an issue with the “what if”. Probably because I am at a stuck point where I believe everything OCD throws at me and I ask for reassurance for every little thing. Bc if I don’t “something will happen”- OCD. Thanks, honestly it feels very isolating because OCD makes you feel like you’re a rare case but in reality, like you said I’m definitely not the only one. Honestly Mike, you sound like a very intelligent person. And you are very good at dissecting this. I appreciate your intel. It definitely has made me give it a different angle. I just have to learn to resist the reassurance part.

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