Does listening to a song as a kid make me gay ?

I have hocd and when I was going through my old songs from 2020, I saw that I had this inappropriate song called slumber party by ashnikko in my likes and it’s making me worry because I was a child listening to that song and I didn’t even know what that song meant nor did I even know that wlw relationships existed until I got older. I recall only listening to that song because it was trending on tiktok at the time and i thought of it as a “confidence booster”. I looked this song up on tiktok and saw everyone saying how this song was their gay awakening and how the straight women are in denial if they listen to it. I’ve always been into boys and seeing those comments on tiktok confused me because does this mean that I am secretly gay and had no idea? I keep going back and trying to remember what I was thinking about in the exact moment and now I’ve scared myself into believing that I was thinking about me and another women and now I don’t know if it’s true or not. Is this also a sign of false memories?

Jeffrey

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 12h

OCD is the doubting disorder and can create doubt about anything. You know who you are attracted to so when those intrusive thoughts come up - don’t engage them. Or practice non- engagement responses like maybe maybe not, or for today I am attracted to men, I’ll deal with being attracted to women if it happens. Don’t try to figure it out. OCD will get louder the more you compulse .

GratitudeGirl

Date posted: 10h

Any comments or any song or lyrics do not affect who you are as a person.. let us say that a person IS in fact gay, that is just a word and a label it does not actually influence who you are.. if you have always been attracted to boys then that is your truth.. I agree with the other comment on here.. if there is a feeling it does not define you and it does not become permanent it is just a monentary feeling.. you have the right to identify however you identify.. I would say a way to to do exposure therapy would be to keep listening to that song and reminding yourself that the song itself doesnt make you anything it is just a song and you are just enjoying the tune.. you are in control of your truth

lalaland3

Date posted: 9h

@GratitudeGirl Thank you so much for this ! I keep thinking and trying to figure out what I was thinking in that moment and idk what’s true or not and I’m struggling from false memories !

GratitudeGirl

Date posted: 9h

@lalaland3 If you have no evidence that you thought it or said it then you can try to move on from that.. maybe I can suggest you that now since you know your truth you can write it in a notebook and when you feel worried you can check it again.. some sort of a soothing statement that reminds you of who you are.. take care

lalaland3

Date posted: 8h

@GratitudeGirl Thank you!!!

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