Danny Pereira-Jardim
- Date posted
- 5y
ocdillustratedocdillustrated
- Date posted
- 5y
There's some all or nothing thinking going on here. The options aren't either devote yourself 100 percent or don't try at all. You have all sorts of options in between. You can pick just one compulsion to eliminate. You can plan erp practice for a certain amount of time. You can keep a tally of times you want to ritualize and do vs times you want to and don't. 50% is much better than 0
AnxiousashleyAnxiousashley
- Date posted
- 5y
We all want our OCD whatever the theme may be to go away as quickly as possible, but the hard truth is that it never really does. It will get easier to cope with as u get better at applying ERP and ACT therapeutic techniques but it is something that you will always have. OCD is a chronic condition. It will come and go. I’ve had OCD since I was 13. I’m currently 28. It has ebbed and flowed but it’s always there. I think accepting that u will always have it is very important. There is always hope though ❤️ it can get much better. I’m currently going through a bad patch right now as I believe a lot of us are.
FathomableFathomable
- Date posted
- 5y
Yeah it does sound like you tend to give up on the process once you do a compulsion, like the day is ruined. Nobody can get it right all the time, and that's a very high bar to set yourself to expect to have a flawless day of constant ERP success. Even people whose OCD is really under control don't usually have perfect days, so it's a big ask to go from constant all-day compulsions one day right to constant ERP the next. As Katie said, there's no reason you need to be "fully devoted" at all. Nobody can give you advice on how to have a perfect day. Hardly any of us ever even have a day like that. It's understandable that you want it to go away ASAP but trying and failing and then giving up because you made a mistake means you truly won't get anywhere. Baby steps, my bud. Perfectionism like this can also make you end up with a whole new OCD theme about doing ERP perfectly, correctly and constantly- and that is a hole you really do not want to go down. Try to do ERP tomorrow one time for 5 minutes and see what happens. A hack which works great for me is to tell myself that I WILL worry and solve the problem but not right now- I'll do it later, I swear, but right now is ERP treatment time and that means sitting with the problem without trying to solve it. ERP isn't about ignoring the thoughts/pushing them away/distracting yourself from them. It's about getting the thought "this piece of evidence might mean you're gay" and not responding to it with mental compulsions OR distracting yourself. It's possible you may be having such a difficult time doing ERP because you are trying to do it by avoiding them. Avoiding is a compulsion. Let the worry be there. Just don't do anything about it. Don't ruminate about consequences. Don't distract yourself with something else. Don't debate, argue with or agree with the thought. Don't answer it. Just breathe and let it be an open question. One which you're not going to solve right this minute. You can survive the experience of being anxious but not looking for answers. Start with 5 minutes, not with a day.
Lou_lourocksLou_lourocks
- Date posted
- 5y
Accept your ocd thoughts. This is difficult for me too, but the less powerful they become, the more freedom you will have. Wish you the best ❤️
AnxiousashleyAnxiousashley
- Date posted
- 5y
@NOCDadvocate-Katie that’s so true. Sometimes it’s hard for us to see the grey areas between our black or white thoughts. Even a little progress IS progress ❤️
Related posts
Wed_Wheel
- Date posted
- 25w
My SO OCD
I have just recently realized that I had SO OCD. This began whenever I was watching porn and had an intrusive thought about the guy in the porn. It was more minor at first, it was a majority of what I was thinking about throughout the day but it didn’t feel as distressing at first. If I had downtime to think about it, it would affect me but if I was just going about my day I wouldn’t notice it. I began going through the compulsions of checking myself. This lasted for a while until another obsession occurred. Then it seemed as if my SO OCD took a step back. I would have flare ups but they would seem to pass. Recently, I had a very bad night of constant compulsions and looking at pictures and imagining things to check myself. After that night it was very distressing, it affected me to the point where people around me began to notice and ask me if I was okay. One of the big reasons I was so upset was my girlfriend, we have been together for over 3 years and I want to spend the rest of my life with her. I was thinking “Oh my god, if I am gay I can never be with her.” I would sit and cry about it thinking I would lose her and that might life would change because I was gay. I finally had enough and talked to her and my parents. We did some research and I was so shocked to find out that I had a form of OCD, it was like a weight being lifted off my shoulders just knowing that other people have been where I am and that I’m not gay. However, I may have naively expected the compulsions and obsessive thoughts to go away now that I knew I had an actual problem. But I found that the compulsions and thoughts were still there and I was going to put some effort into getting better. I have researched and now know what to do when experiencing intrusive thoughts, yet I still have been performing the compulsions which is just feeding into the OCD. I find myself having intrusive thoughts and then start performing compulsions to see if they are true. What really bothers me is when I have an intrusive thought that tells me that I do like something. But when I think about it I have no desire to pursue those thoughts. However when I feed into the compulsions they just seem to feed into each other. It is like my OCD ignores all the things that I know I like and goes straight to panic mode. I am also trying to do ERP and am going to start doing my best to get better. Does anyone have any tips for not performing the compulsions no matter how anxious you are feeling and no matter how real the intrusive thoughts seem to feel?
hannah_77
- Date posted
- 24w
Does anyone know how to make the thoughts weaker?
How do people start practicing erp on their own? Because I tried yesterday, and it helped for like two hours, but it always comes back and scares me. I don’t think i can practice it the right way without help.
Hi_1
- Date posted
- 19w
Advice?
I’ve been stuck in this cycle for the last month or two and am not sure how to get out of it. Basically, I will work on ignoring the thoughts and not responding or engaging plus limiting/completely eliminating compulsions. After a week or two of constant work, the amount of intrusive thoughts in a day goes down. The anxiety each thought causes also goes down with some, but not all, thoughts passing without notice like they would for a normal person. The thoughts that do stick cause anxiety and make me want to ruminate or do other compulsions but I make sure to limit them. After a bit, I’m in a pretty good head space. This is usually when it goes down hill. I’ll start to question if I even have ocd because some of the thoughts (once again not all) pass without notice. The difficulty resisting compulsions goes down and so does the anxiety, only increasing the questioning. I spend a while questioning if I’ve ever had ocd in the first place and then something sets me off or the questioning itself becomes a trigger and I get stuck back into the same ocd cycle with constant rumination, anxiety, and other compulsions. This lasts for a week or two before I know I need to stop and try and work hard to get back to ignoring the thoughts. And the cycle just restarts over and over again. Does anyone have any tips to stop this from happening? It’s really harming my recovery as every few weeks I dive back into the same negative place I was.
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