Danny Pereira-Jardim
- Date posted
- 5y
ocdillustratedocdillustrated
- Date posted
- 5y
There's some all or nothing thinking going on here. The options aren't either devote yourself 100 percent or don't try at all. You have all sorts of options in between. You can pick just one compulsion to eliminate. You can plan erp practice for a certain amount of time. You can keep a tally of times you want to ritualize and do vs times you want to and don't. 50% is much better than 0
AnxiousashleyAnxiousashley
- Date posted
- 5y
We all want our OCD whatever the theme may be to go away as quickly as possible, but the hard truth is that it never really does. It will get easier to cope with as u get better at applying ERP and ACT therapeutic techniques but it is something that you will always have. OCD is a chronic condition. It will come and go. I’ve had OCD since I was 13. I’m currently 28. It has ebbed and flowed but it’s always there. I think accepting that u will always have it is very important. There is always hope though ❤️ it can get much better. I’m currently going through a bad patch right now as I believe a lot of us are.
FathomableFathomable
- Date posted
- 5y
Yeah it does sound like you tend to give up on the process once you do a compulsion, like the day is ruined. Nobody can get it right all the time, and that's a very high bar to set yourself to expect to have a flawless day of constant ERP success. Even people whose OCD is really under control don't usually have perfect days, so it's a big ask to go from constant all-day compulsions one day right to constant ERP the next. As Katie said, there's no reason you need to be "fully devoted" at all. Nobody can give you advice on how to have a perfect day. Hardly any of us ever even have a day like that. It's understandable that you want it to go away ASAP but trying and failing and then giving up because you made a mistake means you truly won't get anywhere. Baby steps, my bud. Perfectionism like this can also make you end up with a whole new OCD theme about doing ERP perfectly, correctly and constantly- and that is a hole you really do not want to go down. Try to do ERP tomorrow one time for 5 minutes and see what happens. A hack which works great for me is to tell myself that I WILL worry and solve the problem but not right now- I'll do it later, I swear, but right now is ERP treatment time and that means sitting with the problem without trying to solve it. ERP isn't about ignoring the thoughts/pushing them away/distracting yourself from them. It's about getting the thought "this piece of evidence might mean you're gay" and not responding to it with mental compulsions OR distracting yourself. It's possible you may be having such a difficult time doing ERP because you are trying to do it by avoiding them. Avoiding is a compulsion. Let the worry be there. Just don't do anything about it. Don't ruminate about consequences. Don't distract yourself with something else. Don't debate, argue with or agree with the thought. Don't answer it. Just breathe and let it be an open question. One which you're not going to solve right this minute. You can survive the experience of being anxious but not looking for answers. Start with 5 minutes, not with a day.
Lou_lourocksLou_lourocks
- Date posted
- 5y
Accept your ocd thoughts. This is difficult for me too, but the less powerful they become, the more freedom you will have. Wish you the best ❤️
AnxiousashleyAnxiousashley
- Date posted
- 5y
@NOCDadvocate-Katie that’s so true. Sometimes it’s hard for us to see the grey areas between our black or white thoughts. Even a little progress IS progress ❤️
Related posts
Anonymous
- Date posted
- 25w
religious OCD
Please help. I have felt so off/wrong all day. I constantly worry that the “bad guy” is going to get me. I have awful thoughts and I constantly want God to know that I don’t mean these thoughts. I am at a point in my therapy where I need to choose to use my ERP but it feels too scary. I then do compulsions, which makes the OCD worse, which makes me want to use ERP less. And the cycle goes on. I am currently sitting in my car crying because I feel so lost and exhausted. I’m not supposed to figure out my thoughts, but today I just went into a spiral of sadness and depression, thinking that I will always feel like this. When my thoughts got really bad at the end of the day, I tried to use ERP even though I was shaking and not believing my responses and I ended up feeling like I missed something and that I gave into the “bad guy.” I have no one to talk when I’m not doing therapy twice a week. I am alone and have no one to talk to when I am like this… please help
Anonymous
- Date posted
- 16w
Need help right now
So been trying to do erp with my therapist for a while now, and tis really hard and feels like it's not working. Il get this weird sensation or feeling that makes me feel"gay" or as if I'm attracted to someone, and I know my therapist keeps telling me" you don't have to put meaning into the thoughts or feelings" but that seems impossible to do because and I'm sorry to say, it makes me feel that specific way. And I'll use the Erp quotes, "maybe maybe not" or"the more I struggle, the worse it gets" or"these feelings and thoughts are here, but I'm choosing to let them be" and I'll do nothing and try to let it be here but it's so distracting and feels very real, and it's like this sensation, small or big and it last all day, and even just sitting with it isn't working. And my therapist will tell me"you don't have to believe in it" and I'm sorry I feel like if it were that easy, OCD would have never been a problem in the first place, or live with uncertainty, however it doesn't feel like uncertainty, but feels very truthful or valid. Idk what I'm doing wrong tho
Annomous_bcye
- Date posted
- 16w
giving up compulsions with ROCD
I still do not have an OFFICIAL diagnosis (I dont have the means to do so) but given my symptoms, past and present in my life hugely suggest OCD is what I am dealing with. I cannot be 100 percent certain but after searching for answers and researching for a long time now, I am fairly certain and confident this is what I am struggling with. Given this step forward, I am making more effort into giving up compulsions. at the current moment I believe to be dealing with ROCD, as I have been having several intrusive thoughts that conflict with my relationship. For starters, recently over the past month or 2, I have been struggling with intrusive thoughts like not being over my ex, being attracted to someone else, losing feelings for my partner and not being in love, etc. I can consciously identify that I dont believe these thoughts to be true but it causes me so much distress and anxiety. It gets extremely unbearable some days, and I have leaned into 2 main compulsions. I have relied on thought checking and googling as my source of relief. At first the googling was genuinely to start finding answers; hence why I have made some of the discoveries I have about OCD including this site. But it developed into every time I was anxious, I would whip my phone out and start googling strictly to find an answer that would reassure me or calm me down. As for thought checking, it acted as a way to reaffirm my love for my girlfriend in my head when I have had the thoughts that collide with my relationship and how I feel about my girlfriend. It worked at first but developed into a compulsion where every time a bad thought got me worked up id either do my normal googling or Id think about that in my head to calm myself down. Over time these compulsions have gotten less and less affective and now when I do them it only gets me more anxious and desperate for reassurance (strengthening the cycle or whatever it is lol). I did some more research and finally have accepted the very real fact that I am going to have to sit in heavy anxiety and not give into compulsions for a while in order to treat this. I have to sit in the thoughts that make me feel all this hightened anxiety and distress without giving into compulsion. to be honest I am scared, the thoughts are more rampant than ever, but I am ready to commit to this. I dont think I am gonna be able to go cold turkey on my compulsions so I am ready for the reality I might relapse on the compulsions sometimes, But am gonna keep going until I can break these shackles OCD has on my life right now. I wanna ask, what is everyones methods they use to avoid giving into compulsion when the thoughts get loud? any advice is welcome :)
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