- Username
- spf420
- Date posted
- 4y ago
Yeah i was just talking about this with a peer consultant and it's perfectly normal for us to mourn the loss of what could have been. I'm so sad, angry, and resentful at times for all that OCD stole from me. A normal teenage experience. A normal development into sexual maturity. Milestones of a regular person. jealousy over those who did not have to face these issues. Anger towards those who unknowingly triggered me. It's sad to feel this way, but it's normal and OKAY! Eventually we will come out the other side stronger because of it all. Like they say, "no use crying over spilled milk."
This makes sense. I do struggle with that last phrase. I have found with my Ocd and depression Its hard for me to get over things going wrong or not how I wanted. Its hard not to feel like a brat because that’s how I feel it looks to other people. Its almost as if im so confused and disengahed from a situation once it starts to go south. Do you have any suggestions of how to deal with this depressed feeling when simple things go wrong?
@spf420 I struggle a lot with it as well. I dwell in the past and i think "i wish i wasn't there at that time and maybe i never would have had ocd" but, the truth is, we can't change the past. But we have absolute control over the future. I don't know exactly how it is i get over things, it's a mix of everything. I start to feel better about myself, i talk to my mom (i get great support from her) and i talk to my therapist. I try to distract myself with things that make me happy. But, when i'm depressed, even that can't do it. Honestly it's about gradually building up your strength to fight it back with positive thoughts.
Yes it can be a tough pill to swallow and I am confident that most people who suffer from OCD have thought about this in the same way you have (myself included). And even though I think it is harsh, the reality is that we are stuck with the brains that we do have - we can’t change these facts. So the options we have are to spend time wishing things were different, or accept the facts about our OCD reality. I tell myself that even if my life would be objectively better without OCD (it might, it might now), I can’t change that part about me. So I have to choose to make the best life I can with OCD, even if it is not as good as a life I think I could have without it. The same would be said for a parent who recently lost a child, someone who is blind, etc. these people also probably think something along the lines of “if only “x” hadn’t happened, things would be okay.” All of us in these scenarios have a decision to make, will we spend any amount of time wondering how much better things could be, or will we accept reality for what it is and make the best of things as they are? Btw I am not saying you are wrong for thinking this (we all have at times and I do empathize with you), just don’t get too caught up in it, because it is a fantasy. Wishing you the best!
Thank you! It does help to know I’m not the only one who has thought this
We can also not be satisfied with a life with OCD. I understand that it’s always going to be a reality for me, but my hope is for it to be as minimized as I can.
When I look at pictures of myself, I see a young woman who deserves a fulfilling life that is not dictated by OCD and anxiety. I feel sad that so much of my time, my energy, and my choices have been consumed by OCD. I spend so much time in my head, ruminating and worrying and trying so damn hard to figure out that one thing that my OCD urgently presses me to solve. Sometimes I don't enjoy things that I want to because I'm overwhelmed with my compulsions. I've struggled with this for years, and lately OCD has been telling me that the struggle will never end--that I'll never feel in control of my life. I know that this isn't true, but I'm so scared that it could be. My faith doesn't feel bigger than my fear right now. How do I change that? I don't want to live like this anymore. As I'm writing this, my OCD is telling me that I'm incapable of recovery, but I know I can recover. I deserve to recover. I'm in therapy with an OCD specialist outside of this app and I'm going to increase the frequency of my sessions from once a month to once a week because I deserve an amazing, fulfilling life. And to whoever is reading this, you do, too.
Or feel like if they allow themselves to recover from OCD then bad things will happen? Any answers or feedback will be greatly apprecaited So I ask this question as I have struggled really bad with OCD for almost 4 years now. So bad that I haven't worked in that time and I have spent all of my savings as I have had to live off it. I am 36 now and up until 4 years ago I had always worked and had a nice amount of money saved for a house deposit. The really frustrating thing is that I feel that I know exactly what it is I need to start doing in order to get a grip of my mental health and this horrific OCD but because I don't feel worthy of being happy and free of ocd and because I've told myself that if I do then something really bad will happen it stops me from allowing myself to get better. I've had over 150 hours of councelling in the past few years aswell as some ERP but because but because off these feelings I can't seem to get better
I’ve experienced OCD since I was 11 years old (I am 29 now), and was diagnosed with it in 2021. So, I’ve lived more than half of my life dealing with this disorder in silence. I’ve recently been feeling like I’m no longer a good person. That all of the things I’ve held close to my heart and loved, no longer matter to me. As much as I try to go back to those things, it sometimes feels so foreign and makes me feel anxious. Has anybody else experienced this before? If so, what are some things you’ve done to help you find happiness and joy in the things you’ve cherished?
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