takingmylifeback
- Date posted
- 5y
Soph Soph
- Date posted
- 5y
I think sometimes what keeps us in our ‘locked’ state is wanting and searching so badly to get out of that state? I’ve read a lot about the benefits of acceptance not only of your thoughts and doubts, but of your current state itself, and by just saying to yourself ‘ok, imma be unsure about my sexuality, but I can still choose to love my boyfriend and know that that’s enough to be able to stay with him! Maybe in the future I’ll not worry about my sexuality, but for now, this is my lot.’ I’m still struggling with HOCD myself and that core fear of sexuality changing (hopefully working on it), but I found that when I said to myself ‘I’m just gonna accept that for know I can’t truly be sure, oh well I’m just gonna get on’ and I found myself still living as a straight woman and daydreaming about guys and getting less and less intrusive thoughts about women.
takingmylifebacktakingmylife...
- Date posted
- 5y
I am 100% going to try this!! Thank you so much for your input
Stronger. Stronger.
- Date posted
- 5y
With practice and proper training, you will be able to be in a place where this thought doesn't even come up, or comes up and passes much quicker. When you engage in compulsions you feed your thoughts and they last much much longer! I would recommend stopping that phrase (unless your couselor has recommended it) and starving the thought instead. Meaning, don't talk back to it. Acknowledge the intense whirlwind of brain chatter in your mind and the crazy sensations it's causing in your body and then set a timer for 5 minutes and just let it be. Everytime you try to tell yourself something, "maybe, I am, maybe I'm not, omg, what if I am? I don't want this, ect." Tell yourself "No" outloud to break the compulsion and recenter. Try this for 5 minutes and see if your anxiety slowly goes down.
takingmylifebacktakingmylife...
- Date posted
- 5y
I’m definitely going to try this!! I guess in those 5 minutes you’re trying to repeat that same thought to yourself or just try to breathe and stuff?
takingmylifebacktakingmylife...
- Date posted
- 5y
Also thank you so much this was really helpful
Stronger. Stronger.
- Date posted
- 5y
@takingmylifeback Well I'm guessing with the severity of your thoughts they are pretty common throughout the day? I don't think you have to repeat anything, the repeating is just to get you triggered which you already are. So your job is to notice when you're going down that rabbit role, go sit yourself down, set a timer for 5 minutes and resist the urge to talk to yourself or analyze anything. Just sit there. Just feel. And breathe. And sit.
Where’sMySerotonin?Where’sMySer...
- Date posted
- 5y
I relate ? I just want actual answers too instead of forcing myself to be okay with uncertainty. Because in reality, IM NOT OKAY WITH UNCERTAINTY. Sometimes we can’t possibly know answers and we just gotta do our best. We’re strong and gotta learn to trust ourselves!
takingmylifebacktakingmylife...
- Date posted
- 5y
THAT IS WHAT IM SAYING like I’m not okay with it and stuff but you stay strong too
Stronger. Stronger.
- Date posted
- 5y
I understand how you feel. I personally don't like the stance of "accept uncertainty" because it doesn't make any sense to me. I in no way am willing to accept that I might murder my family or sexually harm a child. Nope. Not ever going to be okay with that. A lot of people practice being okay with the uncertainty and that's great if it helps them but just know there are other methods out there. These different CBT techniques are tools to pull out of a toolbox. Not every tool works on every job, and not every person wields each tool equally well.
Stronger. Stronger.
- Date posted
- 5y
@christinejg94 Side note though, ERP is teaching me to be okay with the feelings that uncertainty brings. And I feel like that's where the magic happens.
takingmylifebacktakingmylife...
- Date posted
- 5y
@christinejg94 Yea I completely agree with this. I usually compare what I have to POCD for some reason and I think that I would not be okay with saying “maybe I will maybe I won’t” on doing anything to a child like that is just a lot
takingmylifebacktakingmylife...
- Date posted
- 5y
@christinejg94 Yea for sure
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