worryqueen
- Date posted
- 5y
b2192b2192
- Date posted
- 5y
If it makes you feel better I'm a 28 year old woman and when I was in my early 20's I let my dog lick me down below, I experimented when I was a child also. I have felt guilty ever since but it doesnt change what happened. Honestly the fact this happened when you were a child is completely normal. Your OCD will make IIt feel so much worse but that is normal behaviour for a child we all get curious of weird things like that. Your therapist will not judge you on this. I've told a therapist over the phone about what I just told you .. it was really scary but she was so kind.
worryqueenworryqueen
- Date posted
- 5y
Wow, thank you. Hearing that helped a lot. I think I've just been reading into it too much, literally. I've looked up the mandatory reporting policies, and it says child abuse is one of them so I'm scared what i did counts as that. I'm glad you got help, and that your therapist was kind. I hope mine is the same :)
b2192b2192
- Date posted
- 5y
Well they say confessing is the worst thing you can do as it just continues the OCD cycle. I wanted to tell my best friend about what I did, there is no reason to tell her i just wanted reassurance that i wasnt a monster. But I just decided not to tell her. However I did tell my family and they havent judged me they've been really supportive. Are your family supportive, telling your mother about something like this might help just having at least one person to support you so they at least know what your going through.
worryqueenworryqueen
- Date posted
- 5y
Yes it's a bad compulsion of mine. I have actually confessed in the past about this to my sister and mother, they said it was fine and to let it go. I did for a while, but I didn't tell them about the sleeping part and I feel like I should confess that but I dont want to. I brought it up recently with my mom that I feel guilty about some childhood sex acts and she was understanding and supportive, but I think I want to keep the details with a therapist even though my ocd tells me I have to tell everyone everything.
b2192b2192
- Date posted
- 5y
@worryqueen I agree with you , I am exactly the same. My OCD just finds more and more things to confess. I search the I internet everyday just to see if other people have done the same or if I'm a criminal. I'm trying to do it less and less and it is getting better but I just wish it would go away. I think telling your therapist is a great idea, and you have already done the brave part in telling you parents so your OCD will hate this.
worryqueenworryqueen
- Date posted
- 5y
@b2192 Yes I completely understand. Searching the internet just makes it so much worse since I can never find a clear answer. I hope my therapist will have as much understanding as this community does :)
b2192b2192
- Date posted
- 5y
What are you worried about? no judgments Here Also therapists are there to understand and I highly doubt anything you have done or thought about is going to make the suggesuggest you are a danger to anyone.
worryqueenworryqueen
- Date posted
- 5y
When I was ten I played doctor with my younger sister, and also put her hand on my breast while she slept. I feel terrible about it :( idk what they're going to say
b2192b2192
- Date posted
- 5y
Honestly I've been the same, thinking that I was going to be locked up and that everyone will hate me if they knew. It's a horrible feeling, but I keep telling my self that i dont do this anymore and neither do you. The fact we feel bad about it shows we know these things aren't good behaviour and that's a good thing.
worryqueenworryqueen
- Date posted
- 5y
Yes, I agree. I have such black and white thinking, and whenever I make a mistake I feel like I'm on the "bad" side. It's just very hard living with the person I've done this to, I feel like I should confess but that would do more harm than good to her, so I've been told
b2192b2192
- Date posted
- 5y
How old are you btw ?
worryqueenworryqueen
- Date posted
- 5y
I'm 18!
b2192b2192
- Date posted
- 5y
Your still so young. I'm really sad for you that your having to go through this at such a young age. But again what happened with you back then was completely normal, I know I shouldnt keep reassuring ha.. but i just want to remi d you because i know how awful it is to feel like that. I hope everything goes well with the therapist x
worryqueenworryqueen
- Date posted
- 5y
Yeah it's become a problem, I've been obsessing over it for a long time and I'm not sure it'll ever go away, but thank you :)
Fear Strikes OutFear Strikes...
- Date posted
- 5y
@worryqueen When is your therapy appointment? This will be more quickly treated if you are honest with your therapist. In the end, it will be up to you to take the leap of faith and share this torturous memory with your therapist. This is why therapists exist.
worryqueenworryqueen
- Date posted
- 5y
@Fear Strikes Out I'm supposed to schedule my appt on Monday, so I'll probably do it Thursday or Wednesday so school is out of the way. I plan to be honest, but I cant keep thinking on what the reaction will be, and if I'll get reported or not. It's making me even more anxious about getting help and I hate it.
Fear Strikes OutFear Strikes...
- Date posted
- 5y
@worryqueen I really don't want to provide reassurance but, in truth, if I thought there was even a small chance of the therapist reporting, I would advise against disclosing. This disclosure is needed for your treatment to succeed.
worryqueenworryqueen
- Date posted
- 5y
@Fear Strikes Out So you think the best thing to do is to not disclose this information? I feel like I'm stuck. Not sure what to do now.
Fear Strikes OutFear Strikes...
- Date posted
- 5y
@worryqueen No, I think you should disclose this memory to your therapist. That will result in a more effective treatment outcome for you.
worryqueenworryqueen
- Date posted
- 5y
@Fear Strikes Out But you said that if theres even a small chance I could get reported that I shouldn't? I'm confused
Fear Strikes OutFear Strikes...
- Date posted
- 5y
@worryqueen I made it more confusing by the way I expressed it. My bad... I was trying to say that if I thought there was any real chance of it being reported that I would say as much. Point being, I am very confident that it's not going to be reported.
worryqueenworryqueen
- Date posted
- 5y
@Fear Strikes Out Okay, thank you for clearing that up :) I probably wont tell my therapist the whole truth right away, but I will lead up to it. Just to test out the waters first.
Fear Strikes OutFear Strikes...
- Date posted
- 5y
@worryqueen Understood...
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 5y
I'm the same which is why I haven't spoken to anyone yet..but well done for getting to this stage! Good luck ❤
Rhonda1997Rhonda1997
- Date posted
- 5y
We kind of have similar experiences/past events that we feel guilty about, for example I feel really anxious that I’m a bad person because I suddenly remembered something a few months ago that I did to my sister when I was like 10-11 that I had completely forgot about and had not thought twice about until now :/ but I feel like mine seems worse then yours though
worryqueenworryqueen
- Date posted
- 5y
I feel you :( only difference is I've remember this for years, cant seem to blow it off my mine though. Something someone told me though is that instead of calling yourself a bad person, say your ocd thinks your a bad person, not that you actually are
Rhonda1997Rhonda1997
- Date posted
- 5y
@worryqueen Yes that’s true ?
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- Date posted
- 16w
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