So I messed up the other day and read a statistic online regarding a percentage of people with harm ocd and mental/anxiety disorders as a whole harming and/or killing themselves... While the percentage wasn't huge, it was still a percentage/larger than I wish that I hadnt accidentally seen... I'm sorry for the huge trigger, but that currently has me still stuck in a panic mode right now.

This could be a great exposure for ERP for you! Find the article with that stat and bookmark it. Once a day, read it. As you do: do nothing to neutralize, change, cancel out, or get rid of any intrusive thoughts and anxieties that pop up. With each new thought, just allow it to be there. Accept that it’s happening, ie “I’m having doubts about whether I’ll act out my fears,” and then just sit with it. Hold that and feel it without doing anything to make yourself feel better or distracted or safer. Just sit. And let it dissipate and leave on its own. We often try so hard to run from doubt and fear. But if we just take the time to feel it, it often leaves on its own.

I saw that one a while back 😂 it was indeed terrifying. But once I accepted that thought, that fact as maybe applying to me, maybe not, accepting the uncertainty that I may or may not do it, then my anxiety eventually fell away. Feel that panic and wait for it to pass and resist compulsions. And when it comes back it will be less and less!

Thank all of you!! After reading so many great things on that particular article, it (ironically) ended with a very scary stat, I've never really felt much depression (as far as I know) but have dealt with numerous types of anxiety my whole life, the whole harm ocd occurred after listening to some music by Kurt Cobain and watching some horrible 9/11 videos on youtube a few years ago, the suicidal/harm OCD went away on its own for a couple of years but I suddenly started having the thoughts again long hours at a job while drunking caffeine energy drinks everyday to stay alert at work.

Thank you so much!!