- Date posted
- 4y
- Date posted
- 4y
Of course. The worst is when you feel in your mind like you are actually enjoying the intrusive thoughts/checking. Just hang in there. We will get through this.
- Date posted
- 4y
Similar things have happened to me bro. It sucks. It feels like your life is slipping away, like you are losing your identity and should just give in sometimes. Hopefully we both get through this.
- Date posted
- 4y
Yes, and the testing.
- Date posted
- 4y
You are not alone.
- Date posted
- 4y
One of the most useful points of understanding that has helped me is that you do not need to carry out the compulsions or the testing. It actually makes things worse, as I am sure it did for you. Whenever you get an urge to do something or check, sit with the anxiety and recognize that part of the ERP is not checking and not needing an answer right away (as if the testing will actually provide any answers).
- Date posted
- 4y
My HOCD is getting to me as well man. ERP is a real big challenge for us. Can you help me out with my situation as well? It’s about a Celebrity. My HOCD is making me feel like I have a crush on a celebrity because I imagine him in different movies (not romantic ones) and whisper his name under my breath. My friends also asked if I would fuck the celebrity (in a joking way) and I said of course not but my HOCD is like “would you want to fuck him” or “you know you want it”. NO I FUCKING DONT. I JUST WANT TO BR STRAIGHT WITH A WIFE AND TWO KIDS, AND YET THIS HOCD KEEPS FUCKING WITH ME.
- Date posted
- 4y
Like the anal sensations?
- Date posted
- 4y
It becomes unbearable sometimes with the urges and compulsions. Like if I don’t do them time just stands still and they’ll just come back once I’m alone again
- Date posted
- 4y
I feel you man. Trust me. Understand that you have power over how you respond. You cannot control the thoughts, but your life will not collapse if you fail to check or act on the “urges”.
- Date posted
- 4y
Like I said, I am going through similar things and, while I am still in the thick of it all, you are not alone. There are other people going through similar things with HOCD (I hope).
- Date posted
- 4y
You’re right. Thank you man. It sucks I hate it so much but it feels better to know that someone else is going through the same thing
- Date posted
- 4y
Thank you man I appreciate you talking to me
- Date posted
- 4y
Anytime
- Date posted
- 4y
I’ve been masturbating to women 2-3 times in the last 6 years. And my HOCD is telling me that I’ve been covering up the fact I’m gay by masturbating to women constantly. But I know I’ve been attracted to women, and I’ve had multiple crushes on women
- Date posted
- 4y
Same man. Try not to worry about it too much. I know that is easier said than done. The checking will just make it worse. Stay away from PMO for a while and try to just live your life. By putting so much energy into this obsessive thought cycle, it is just going to make things feel more and more like reality. The anxiety might even go away and leave you with false attractions and the whole menagerie of uncomfortable sensations. The more you try to analyze, the worse it gets.
- Date posted
- 4y
@nGfloat My HOCD is making me feel like I’m enjoying the thoughts too, which fucking saddens me. Everytime I watch a video with a dude in it, my mind just goes “cute” or “hot” and it feels like I want it when I don’t. Kill me please.
- Date posted
- 4y
@SOOCD Hey bro, I know how it feels, trust me. Still going through it hard making me think I genuinely enjoy some of the stuff when, in retrospect, it distresses me to high heavens. I am going to try not to provide any reassurance, as that is not the way forward. This is not an existential threat. The thoughts cannot actually hurt you (only your response, and the compulsions can). Live life because you, as all humans on this planet, deserve to.
Related posts
- Date posted
- 22w
Idk if this post is even worth it but it seemed like a normal day for me, called off work due to the weather so I get to just stay home and play games all day. Easy day besides dealing with the constant and unbearable battle with my intrusive thoughts/feelings. Took a shower and I just had constant thoughts, (heart palpitations are pretty constant) ended up breaking down and bawling my eyes out. I was diagnosed with HOCD and ROCD about 2 months ago and since it's just gotten worse. It feels as real as it can get and after talking to my girlfriend about the anxiety attack, it feels even more real. I have no desire or enjoyment from what comes from my brain, and at this point I'm on my knees begging the big man upstairs for my old life back, how do I go from being obsessed with women (sexually and emotionally) to pretty much doing a 180 overnight (with the obvious anxiety and worry behind it. No real desire obviously). I'm just at a loss, I've done a little ERP and it seemed to help with the brain fog but besides that, everything that it does to someone, I have. And again there's the doubt I even have OCD and I'm in straight denial. It just sucks.
- Date posted
- 17w
I’ve completely lost myself. I can’t focus on my studies, I can’t go to the gym. Dang it I can’t even be around my male friends normally anymore. I got no idea why or how this happened but the only thing I know for sure is that I never questioned my sexuality neither doubted it. I never cared in general. I just liked girls. I keep testing and keep testing and keep testing my arousal but no matter how many times I see but I don’t feel the same way for guys that I do with girls my mind will always try to make me believe that I am gay. It’s like it’s forcing me into an identity I never asked for. But at the end of the day like my psychologist told me. Sexuality doesn’t change. So since I never felt anything for guys in my life it’s ocd. I’ve been up and down for 5 months now and while the last week I was feeling way better. Monday now and I’m back to zero. I just want to go back when everything was normal. I can’t keep living with this.
- Date posted
- 17w
Like I can’t think straight. This is making me doubt everything I’ve thought about myself and even makes me feel like I like the thoughts when I know I don’t. Like I would be less anxious at a time while I still have the thoughts and my mind would go “oh so you like it you must be gay” or the other one where I’m not anxious and I think of my attraction for girls that I’ve had my whole life and my mind goes “see now you’re not into them you’re gay” like it’s so stupid but so effective. I clearly remember being into girls my whole life but my mind is making me believe that all these attractions and feelings for women were all fake or “a thing of the past”. But I can still get aroused by women but I have this weird anxiety going on which brings these sensations/feelings and it’s so weird. Today I’ve spent my whole day thinking about it like I’ve been doing for 5 months now. I know that this aint normal but my mind just won’t let me live in peace. I never cared about my sexuality cuz I simply liked women my whole life but now my sexuality is a fundamental philosophy. I hate this.
Be a part of the largest OCD Community
Share your thoughts so the Community can respond