People who have experienced ROCD- I had a rough day yesterday with my boyfriend due to acting on some compulsions. My compulsion is to seek reassurance. It was just not a good night because he was getting impatient, I was getting sensitive.. just not good. Anyway, we’re good now, but I just feel uneasy. My OCD always continues because after I complete a compulsion, I feel guilty and then I get more irrational thoughts that my boyfriend will leave me... thus I seek more reassurance. How do I get out of this insecure space in my head WITHOUT seeking reassurance again? Does this last a long time?

Lately my ROCD has been flaring up, making it difficult to even be around my partner. I’m having so many troubling thoughts with the one that bugs me most being, “maybe this isn’t my OCD, maybe I’m just in a bad relationship and I’m trying to cover it up and blame it on OCD”. This thought really scares me because there are valid doubts in my relationship but my boyfriend and I have openly talked about them and are trying to work through. My OCD won’t take that as an option tho. It makes me feel like I need to be 100% certain that these things can NEVER happen again or else we need to break up immediately. So anything he says in that moment about trying to do better, my OCD will not trust anything he says and just wait until the next “bad thing” happens. When I continuously bring these things up to my boyfriend even tho nothing has happened between these conversations, it exhausts him making it feel like he can never do enough. I feel so bad because I know it’s just my OCD getting in the way. But then that thought creeps in saying I can’t trust him because I need to protect myself. It’s just an ongoing cycle that is so tiring. I don’t even know what I want anymore. We are very opposite when it comes to emotions. I am very in tune and very emotionally intelligent, and he is not. He is the opposite. I do recognize that my anxious attachment style may be hard for him too but I can’t stop thinking about all of his flaws and all of the things he needs to do to make our relationship better. It makes me feel like I’m the only one putting in effort when in reality that is not true. But my OCD does make me feel like he doesn’t really love me or want to be with me and that he feels forced to be with me or do things for me. It makes me feel like him being with me is like a chore. Can anyone relate? My OCD just makes me feel like I can’t trust anything he says to make our relationship better.

Hi all, I’m F(20) and I’ve been in a relationship with my boyfriend M(20) for 10 months now. Lately it feels like I’ve been getting triggered at the tiniest thing. My relationship OCD is centered around the idea that my bf will leave me, that suddenly his feelings will change and he’ll never look back. Inherently I know this is irrational and I know he loves me very much (as he tells me repeatedly when I compulsively ask for reassurance). I just can’t make my brain stop. I just feel so unsecured. He will mention that one of his friends drove an hour to see him for only 30 minutes. I will then spiral that I am not possibly doing enough and it’s because he’s secretly done with me and he’s longing for a reason to leave and go be with this friend instead. See? Truly irrational. But I cannot stop it. Any tips at all? Maybe I’m at least not alone in this. I often feel literally insane:(

[ vent ] At times, I'll be doing fine, and I won't be thinking about anything, and then boom. I have thoughts like, you don't love your partner, you only say I love you to convince yourself you love him, you don't actually like him. It makes me really upset because I genuinely do like my partner, I genuinely do want to be with my partner, I wouldn't do anything to hurt him, and I love him so much. But I always tend to talk to AI, and AI is always telling me my symptoms are just ROCD. And I just want to get rid of it because I didn't have these problems before, and now I do, and I just want them to go away. Yesterday, I was literally crying because of how bad I felt. My partner does me amazing, he treats me amazing, but my thoughts always lead me to wonder, what if this isn't ROCD and I just genuinely don't like my partner? Even though, as much as I want to, what if I don't, but I really do, and I want to be with him, and I do love him. Recently, I've talked to him about these feelings, and he told me that he's felt like this before as well, but the way he comes with it, he doesn't think about it as much. But me, it goes in my head over and over and over and over and over and over, it's like a loop or a cycle that never ends. And I always look up, how can I heal from ROCD, and it just says to settle with the thoughts, don't look for reassurance, and it's hard not to do that because like, what else am I supposed to do? It's hard for me not to do that because it's so heavy, and to me, for my ROCD, it never shows up as what if questions, it always shows up as statements like, you don't, you don't love him, you don't want to be with him, you're only saying that you love him to convince yourself you do, stuff like that. It's hard